A Family for the Rugged Rancher / Soldier on Her Doorstep: A Family for the Rugged Rancher / Soldier on Her Doorstep. DONNA ALWARD
complicated look and he spun on his heel, heading out the door again without waiting for her to answer.
Talk? Emily put her fingers to her lips. They were still humming from the contact with his. They wouldn’t talk about this at all—not if she could help it.
CHAPTER SIX
LUKE MADE THE last turn around the field, leaving a swath of sweet-smelling grass behind him and a sense of relief in its wake. The sun shone benevolently down on him right now, but by tomorrow night that would change. The forecast was for rain and thunderstorms. As long as the fine weather held out for another day the first cut would be done and baled and, most importantly, dry. If everything went on schedule. And if the repairs he’d made to the baler held. A lot of ifs.
He checked his watch. Nearly lunch. The Orrick brothers had been raking the east field and would eat their meal in their truck. Luke could have brought his lunch with him, but he looked forward to going back to the house and seeing what Emily had cooked up. Usually he appreciated the thought of peace and quiet and solitude at mealtime. But lately he’d found himself looking forward to Emily’s quiet greetings and Sam’s chatter.
As he turned the tractor south towards home, he frowned. This wasn’t something he should let himself get used to. Cooking or not, being around Emily wasn’t the best idea. Not after yesterday. What had he been thinking, kissing her like that? He’d got carried away. She’d turned those liquid brown eyes on him, so hurt and insecure. She’d hate his pity, but he was sorry that she had to carry the weight of her family on her own, knowing there was no way out from beneath the weight of responsibility. Sorry that she’d been married to a man who didn’t appreciate all she did. Her lip had quivered and he’d wanted to make it up to her somehow.
Oh, who was he fooling? He touched the throttle, speeding up as he hit the straight dirt lane. He had wanted to kiss her, plain and simple. Still did, if it came to that, even though he knew it was a huge mistake. He could justify it six ways from Sunday, but the truth was she was the prettiest thing he’d laid eyes on in forever. She was out here in the middle of nowhere, but she didn’t turn up her nose like so many of the girls did these days—like ranching was some sort of second-class occupation. She breathed deeply of the air, enjoying the space and freedom. And the way she touched Sam, ruffling his hair and showering him with hugs. It was the sort of affectionate touch that was second nature to a mother. The kind he’d grown up with. His mother had been firm but loving. His father, too.
Until his mother had died and everything changed.
The house was in sight, and he spied Emily and Sam in the vegetable garden. For a moment it felt so incredibly right. But then the feeling grew heavy in his chest. It couldn’t be right. Emily was far too hurt from her divorce, no matter what she said. And Luke liked Sam but he didn’t want kids. He didn’t want to be married, either. The last thing he wanted was the burden of caring for a family, risking putting them through what he’d been through. Each time he visited his father he was reminded of what the future could hold for him. Seeing his dad suffer quelled any ideas Luke had about a family of his own. No, he’d run the farm and leave the marriage and kids thing to his sisters.
And no matter what Emily said, she was the marrying kind. She wasn’t the kind of woman a man trifled with. She certainly wasn’t the type for an eyes-open-no-strings fling. So that left them right back at boss and employee.
He pulled up to the barn and wasn’t surprised to see Sam bounding along to greet him. He was a good kid. He minded his mother and was polite and didn’t get into things he shouldn’t get into. “Hey, Sam.”
“Luke! We’re weeding your garden and I only pulled up one bean.” His face fell a little. “I hope that’s okay.”
“One little bean plant isn’t going to make any difference, don’t worry,” Luke assured him. The boy had clearly forgiven him for any slights made earlier as he aimed a wide smile at Luke. He noticed Sam had lost his first tooth and couldn’t help but smile back at the lopsided grin. “Tooth fairy give you anything for that?”
“A dollar,” Sam announced proudly.
Luke cleared his head, pushing away the earlier thoughts of kissing Emily. Sitting on a tractor for hours always gave him way too much time to think. What was he so worried about? It wasn’t like he was falling in love with her or anything. It had just been a kiss. Nothing to lose sleep over.
Except he had. It had been ten past midnight when he’d checked the alarm clock last night. Replaying the taste of her, the feel of her in his arms. He walked towards the garden with Sam, watching Emily bent over the tiny green plants. His gaze dropped to the curve of her bottom and his mouth went dry. She straightened, standing up in the row of peas and put her hands on her lower back, stretching.
Little pieces of her hair curled up around the edges of one of his baseball caps, the curved brim shading her eyes from the sun. She wore cutoff denim shorts and a T-shirt the same color as the lilacs by the front verandah, the cotton hugging her ribs, emphasizing her spare figure. His gaze caught on the long length of her leg and he swallowed. It was impossible to stop thinking about yesterday when he’d held her in his arms.
“We might actually get this first cut done before the weather changes,” he remarked as he approached the rows of vegetables. Now he was reduced to talking about the weather? It wasn’t a good sign when he felt the need to keep things to nice, safe topics. He looked over the garden. Half of it was neatly weeded and tended, the tiny shoots healthy and green. The other half was slightly scraggly. “Thank you for doing the garden. It was on my to-do list.”
“It was no trouble. The inside of the house is under control now and it was too beautiful a day to waste. I like being outside, and so does Sam. Don’t you Sam?”
Sam nodded, his bangs flopping. “Yup. Mom showed me what a pea plant looks like, and a bean and the carrots, too!” He held up a small pail. “And I took the weeds to the compost pile, too.”
“You’re a good help,” Luke said, unable to resist the boy’s excitement. How often had he done this very thing? All the kids had. Working in the garden had been part of their summer chores. “I like working in the outdoors, too.”
“Mom said you’re too busy to take me on the tractor or anything.”
Luke angled his head and looked at Sam, assessing. Sam was what, almost five? At that age, Luke had already been helping in the barns and riding on the tractor with his dad. The memories were good ones, and Sam hadn’t experienced anything like that.
“I’m going to be raking hay this afternoon. You can come with me if you like.”
Maybe it was a bad idea. He was trying to keep his distance and he wasn’t sure Emily would appreciate him encouraging her son. But neither could he stand the thought of the boy feeling alone, left out. Luke knew that helping his dad had made him feel a part of something. The sound of the machinery, the time out of doors, the sense of accomplishment. What could it hurt, just this once?
Sam’s eyes lit up and he practically bounced on his toes. “Mom? Can I?”
Emily’s dark eyes were centered on him again and he felt the same tightening as he had yesterday when he’d held her body against his. Lord, she’d been sweet and soft and when he’d kissed her every single thought in his brain had gone on vacation.
“You don’t have to do that, Luke. You’re busy. Sam can wait for another time.”
Sam’s shoulders slumped in disappointment and he scuffed a toe in the dirt, the action reminiscent of his mother. Clearly Sam had wanted to go, and it was no big deal having him on the tractor with him. Hadn’t the boy suffered enough disappointments lately? Luke looked at Emily, knowing she was acutely unhappy with the path her life had taken. He knew she was trying to do her best, but that cloud of unhappiness affected Sam, too. She couldn’t keep him tied to her apron strings forever.
“It’s just a tractor ride,” he answered. “I’m going to be sitting there anyway, raking what we cut yesterday. The boys will