Dating and Other Dangers. Natalie Anderson
little grid detailing “all about this blog” …
EthanRush—supposedly “shamed” as Mr 3 Dates and You’re Out over on WomanBWarned wants those women to get real and for guys to wise up to the dating reputation dross that’s online. Come hang out here, boys, and get clued up to the reality. And get way better dating advice than any you’ll read over there.
Because he was so much more of an expert on dating than Ms OlderNWiser, and she was going to know it. He chuckled as he composed his first entry. There was nothing like a direct challenge to get his blood pumping. Grin wolfish, he started typing the beginning.
GuysGetWise: The chick flick is your friend
According to the self-proclaimed guru over at WomanBWarned, OlderNWiser, going to the movies is a dumb first date destination.
Wrong.
A cinema is a nice, totally safe environment that can push the defrost button on even the most hardened ice queen—like OlderNWiser herself.
You can round it out more if you want by going for pizza before, if necessary—NOT the usual cheap delivery, guys. This first time it’s got to be gourmet. Be seen to be making an effort. But, as we all know, there’s nothing worse than being stuck at a pricey restaurant with a vacuous woman who has no conversation while waiting hours for two strips of potato, a fifty-pence-sized piece of steak and some weird green oil drizzled in dots on the edge of an oversized white plate. Instead go for pizza to say hi, and then ease off the pressure for a bit.
The movie gives you a couple of hours to settle into each other’s company—you’re close, but not too intensely focused on each other. Afterwards you’ve got something to talk about to start you off. And then, once she’s started, she won’t stop. Babes like to talk—and they will if warmed up. After a movie she’ll be in the mindset. So let her share with you.
Immutable dating fact: the more you let her share, the more she’ll want to be with you. It’s that simple.
You might wince, but the chick flick in particular is your friend. She’ll get the warm fuzzy feeling. Go for the one-two punch—the chick flick followed by dessert. She’ll be as gooey inside as the chocolate pudding she’s spooning in. And, bud, you will benefit from the happy ending hormones she’s riding on.
Brace yourselves and get her to a rom-com, feel-good kissy flick. That’s what I’ll be doing with Ms OlderNWiser. It’s the perfect first date softener. And us guys like soft.
Ethan paused, his fingers hovering above the keyboard, his lips twisting as an evil urge gripped him.
Stay tuned for how to nail her on the second date.
He hit “publish” before he had second thoughts. Hey, he’d said it all along—there was a lot of rubbish out there on the internet. And she’d shredded his rep anyway, right? This was his way of reclaiming his own image. He didn’t really give a damn about what the anonymous readers on the ends of the ethernet thought, but he was not a cheat—yes, he played, but all the playmates had fun. And he’d get even the world’s most uptight woman to appreciate some fun.
His blood quickened, but he forced his brain to stay open for duty. He went into the WomanBWarned site and registered—under his own name—and then went to the Mr 3 Dates and You’re Out thread to comment.
EthanRush: Looking for another side to this little story? What happened to balance and verification of information? Neither of those things are apparent on this bitch-fest. So how about a challenge? The woman in WomanBWarned herself—OlderNWiser—has agreed to a series of dates with me, Mr 3 Dates and You’re Out. As she’s Chief Judge and Executioner around here, she’s agreed to give me a fair trial.
Three dates, of course.
She’ll play them her way. I’ll play them mine.
We’ll report back and you can decide—who’s the honest one and who’s the user?
Who’s the victor?
The comment appeared beneath all the others. He’d well and truly thrown down the gauntlet. What he needed now were some supportive comments to get traffic his way and stack the odds in his favour. Happily, he had some guys who knew him well enough to know his tongue was—partly—in his cheek. Guys liked sport, and he was a team player. His team would get behind him. He put the link on his social networking page, then shut the laptop and closed his eyes.
And then it hit him.
This was mad. This wasn’t what was supposed to have happened. He was supposed to have gone in there all guns blazing and torn shreds off her. Demand she take down the thread, take down the whole damn site, and totally threaten to sue her.
Okay, he had threatened that.
But only after he’d been struck by a far more entertaining idea. The threat had simply been a way to push her into accepting that far more entertaining idea. With her OlderNWiser handle he’d figured he’d be facing down some ancient hardened up crone, but in reality she looked like one of the fairies on his three-year-old niece’s miniature china teaset. All fine bones and fine features in her heart-shaped face, with her hair tumbling loose and kinking at the ends. And, yes, his thoughts had immediately kinked.
He’d have to be careful how he played this, because he refused to end up in a mess. He did charming and nice—never messy. But he’d teach her a lesson—Nadia Keenan was going down.
No, not sex—there’d be no sliding along sun-kissed limbs, no stroking delicate collarbones, no relentlessly touching ‘til she begged for mercy and then screamed her ecstasy in his mouth. No matter how vivid that fantasy was, an even bigger temptation bit. He’d get her hot and twisted and then be a total gentleman. Restraint all the way. And she’d hate him even more than she already did.
He couldn’t get over the contradiction—she looked sweet but she savaged people with her vindictive website. Who’d hurt her, and how? She’d said it wasn’t personal, but there had to have been a guy who’d broken what little heart she had. Her online ID even acknowledged she was OlderNWiser.
He flipped the laptop open again, went back to WomanBWarned and clicked on the archives link.
To win any game you had to be prepared. You had to understand your opponent’s weakness.
Nadia wished Megan was home, but she was in Greece for three weeks, meeting her boyfriend Sam’s family, meaning the flat they shared was quiet and empty and totally lacking in advice—the walls weren’t answering back.
She pushed aside the clothes-hangers in her wardrobe, desperately searching despite knowing exactly what items were there and that whatever it was she wanted wasn’t.
Because she didn’t know what she wanted and she didn’t have the funds to shop.
She had to ace it over Ethan Rush, but he had every angle covered. Good looking, intelligent, loaded—that was obvious from his clothes and his confidence. Everything came easily to him—even her acquiescence to his stupid idea. She had to shake him from his self-satisfied, smug little perch. But how?
She picked up the bag she’d tossed on her bed. Her phone rang just as she got hold of it. Megan—hooray for serendipity.
‘What do I wear to a date I don’t want to go on?’ Nadia asked straight off.
‘A date?’ Megan’s high-pitched amazement was no surprise. ‘Why don’t you want to go?’
‘Because he’s a complete jerk who’s bullied me into it.’
‘Nadia,’ Megan scoffed, ‘no one bullies you.’
Ten