Play It Again, Sahm. Meredith Efken

Play It Again, Sahm - Meredith  Efken


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I’m sorry about what Hannah said. She was rude. You going to talk to her about it? I’ve half a mind to let her know what we Texans do to little chits who diss on our family members.

      You hang tough now, you hear?

      Veronica

From: Rosalyn Ebberly <[email protected]>
To: VIM <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Ouch!

      Dearest sister,

      You can relax— I’m perfectly fine. Hannah obviously has a lot of repressed anxiety and an emotional hunger for acceptance and a sense of superiority. These things are inflicted on the juvenile psyche and manifest themselves in a variety of ways, include an inability to gauge appropriate social behavior. I wonder how her relationship with her father is? Regardless, I’m not planning to speak to her about it at all. It’s not my problem.

      Anyway, rest assured I am not allowing her emotional unrest and woundedness to disturb my personal sense of peace and well-being. I just picture Jesus as my bubble of light, surrounding me as I float down the sewers of life. No matter how murky the waters, they don’t need to contaminate my inner wholeness. Oh, Ronnie, I can’t tell you how freeing it is! This sort of thing would have made me so angry a year and a half ago, but now…it just rolls right off.

      Though I would like to know what you were going to say… Sharp as a what? You have my permission, dear girl, to “speak Texan.” I don’t even care if it’s put on or genuine. Those sort of petty issues no longer have the power to upset my spiritual centeredness.

      With love,

      Rosalyn

      “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.” Proverbs 14:1 (NASB)

From: VIM <[email protected]>
To: Rosalyn Ebberly <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Ouch!

      Was going to say, “She made you look about as sharp as a mashed potato.”

      Therapy or not, you are still one bizarre chick, sis. Shrink turned you into a Buddhaesque freak. Either that, or you’re on some pretty strong drugs.

      Veronica

From: Rosalyn Ebberly <[email protected]>
To: VIM <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Ouch!

      LOL! Neither. I’m high on the peace of Jesus and emotional wholeness.

      Rosalyn

      “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.” Proverbs 14:1 (NASB)

From: VIM <[email protected]>
To: Rosalyn Ebberly <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Ouch!

      I think Buddha-enhanced drugs would be less scary than your evangelical-induced Nirvana. But you know I love ya anyway.

      Veronica

From: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To: Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject: Whatcha doin’?

      Hey, hotstuff, what are you doing?

From: Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Whatcha doin’?

      Working, of course. Nobody warned me that interior design would entail marital counseling. I’ve got a meeting tomorrow with the Kerricks, who are fighting over the design of their master suite. She said she wanted “red walls and gold satin curtains” and his response was “Great, we’ll be sleeping in a bordello.”

      She said, “And how would you know about that?”

      “Well, how else is a guy going to get some action, huh?”

      And then they were off. I know FAR too much about the Kerricks now. Blech!

      So my job tomorrow is to calm them both down before they decide to get a divorce and leave me with an outstanding bill. This is NOT what they trained us for in school!

      What are you doing? Where are the kids?

      Love ya!

      Dulcie

From: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To: Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Whatcha doin’?

      I’m e-mailing you. The kids are…let’s see… MacKenzie is doing a hair-singeing experiment with the lighter, and I gave the twins permission to take their dolls to the roof and play up there for a while.

From: Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject: Very. Funny.

      Your humor is sad, as in S-A-H-D, stay-at-home DAD SAD. You obviously are bored and don’t have enough to keep you busy. You could bring me a snack or something.

From: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To: Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Very. Funny.

      A snack? Do I look like a live-in maid? Sheesh. I cook for you, I clean for you, I care for the kids—and this is the thanks I get? Bring me a snack? I’m insulted.

From: Dulcie Huckleberry <[email protected]>
To: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>
Subject: Re: Very. Funny.

      You might as well—you’ve still got a dish towel over your shoulder. You look like housekeeper material to me. Just missing the apron.


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From: Thomas Huckleberry <[email protected]>