Perfect Crime. Helen Fields
experiences. I feel as if I’ve lost touch with everything I joined the force to do. All police officers have a healthy dose of hero syndrome. It’s why we throw ourselves into the middle of fights, and – yes – dangle off high walls to preserve that one piece of evidence that’ll be gone by morning. I don’t have a death wish. Quite the opposite. I need to feel alive again.’
‘Damn, I forgot the bath,’ he said, dashing off towards his bedroom.
She heard the water stop flowing and cupboard doors banging. He reappeared holding two huge crimson towels and offering her a hand up.
‘Ava, I understand you’re feeling stuck, but you could have died tonight. That’s more than just desk boredom.’
‘It’s not just my desk,’ she groaned as she hobbled towards his bathroom. ‘There’s nothing – and no one – to go home to. Work is my whole life, so when I’m not sure why I’m doing it any more … God, listen to me moaning. I love my job, you know that. But I’m in my mid-thirties. I haven’t been in a relationship in forever, and the last one I did try was a disaster. My best friend calls me a work-in-progress and that might be funny if it weren’t true. I don’t go out. I don’t do social media. I can’t even bloody well cook! How sad is it to count down the hours until you’re back behind the desk you’re starting to hate?’
She dropped the blanket on the bathroom floor and pulled her top over her head. Callanach turned away to give her some privacy. Ava winced audibly as she lowered herself into the hot water.
‘I’ll give you some space,’ Callanach said, reaching for the door handle.
‘Actually, could you stay?’ she asked quietly. ‘I mean, with your back turned, obviously. I may be sad and lonely but I’m not that desperate.’
‘Charming,’ he laughed, sitting in the bathroom doorway but staring out into his bedroom, his suitcase as yet unpacked on the floor and his passport thrown onto the bedcovers. ‘Dizzy?’
‘A little,’ Ava admitted, dunking her hair backwards in the water and screwing up her face at the cloudy swirls of red that came out of it. ‘Hey, thanks for looking after me. And I’m sorry for what I put you through up there. I haven’t even asked if you’re hurt.’
‘Couple of bruises from when you landed on top of me. For someone who can’t cook, you can certainly eat.’
Ava laughed. ‘Bastard,’ she said, throwing a wet flannel at the back of his head.
They both knew it wasn’t true. Ava was thinner than ever. Callanach had only been away a couple of weeks, but he’d noticed it as soon as he’d seen her at the city mortuary.
‘So, I hope you don’t mind me asking, but of all the medical suggestions you had, you didn’t mention Selina. Is everything okay, only it seemed logical to me that you might have offered to let your accident and emergency doctor girlfriend take a look at me?’
Callanach stretched his arms above his head and breathed deeply. ‘Ex-girlfriend. Very amicable and I’m sure if I’d have asked, she’d have been only too happy to have helped out. It just felt like I’d be taking advantage, given how badly I’ve let her down.’
‘Your decision then, not hers? Stop me if I’m prying.’
‘Good. I’m stopping you. You’re prying,’ he replied gently.
‘Did she not go to Paris with you?’ Ava continued.
Callanach tutted. ‘Really?’ he asked.
‘Well, I am naked in your bath, so I feel somewhat entitled to be questioning you about your private life, especially given that I’ve just poured my heart out to you about what a pathetic loser I am.’
‘You recognise that I just saved your life, right? Was that not enough, or do you still feel as if I owe you the extra pound of flesh?’
He turned to stare at her, forgetting his promise to remain facing the other direction, not that her modesty was compromised from his angle. All he could see was the top of her head and her eyes, beneath which he knew she was grinning wildly.
‘We talked about her joining me in Paris, but I had too much to sort out with my mother. Selina suggested we book a holiday together later in the year – something to look forward to in the summer. I knew it wasn’t right. She’s an amazing woman.’
‘Way too good for you,’ Ava said gently.
‘Agreed. Anyway, I told her just before I left. She wanted me to think about it while I was away and maybe give it another try, but I’m wasting her time. She needs to be free to find someone who can be everything she deserves. I’d planned to call her tonight and make that clear, but then you decided to pull this little stunt.’
‘Oh God, I’m sorry, Luc. Why is life never simple?’
‘At least you took my mind off it. Are you ready to get out yet?’
‘Yeah. Tired now,’ she said. ‘Would you mind helping me up? My muscles are starting to seize.’
‘Sure,’ he said. ‘Eyes closed, I promise.’
‘You’d better. I couldn’t stand to see the look of disappointment on your face after being used to Selina’s five feet ten inches of pure legs and all-round Spanish gorgeousness.’ She reached a hand out to put on Callanach’s shoulder as she climbed gingerly from the tub and picked up a towel. ‘Okay, I’m decent.’
‘Why do you always do that?’ he asked.
‘Ask for help getting out of the bath? I’m not sure I make a habit of …’
‘Put yourself down and make a joke of everything. Is that really how you see yourself, or are you just pushing men away?’ Callanach asked, letting her lean on his arm as she left the bathroom.
‘It’s too late for serious conversations,’ she said. ‘You take the bed. I’m already invading your space. I’ll be fine on the sofa.’
‘No, you won’t. You’ll sleep on the bed and I’m staying next to you. I don’t like the look of that bump and you shouldn’t be left alone. Now lie down. I need to put some Steri-Strips on those wounds.’
‘How come I never noticed you were this bossy before?’ she smiled, lying back against the pillows.
‘You never nearly fell from a castle wall when I was responsible for your safety before,’ he said, peeling the stitches from a pack and applying them every inch along the gash to her leg.
‘It was awful,’ Ava said, suddenly serious and biting her nails. ‘I really thought I was going to fall. It seemed to take hours and I was aware of everything. Every part of my body, the weight going through my hands, the pain in my shoulders, you yelling. I could taste the blood running from my head. And I really, really didn’t want to fall. I hope that’s not how our dead man felt. I’ve been scared before, Luc, but never like that, so out of control. I felt utter hopelessness.’
Callanach finished what he was doing and looked up. Ava was tearful and pale in spite of the hot bath. The eye beneath the bump on her head was beginning to blacken. He could count on one hand the number of times he’d seen her cry since he’d first met her and she’d been through hell on more than one occasion. Drawing the covers up to get her warm, he went to dim the lights and draw the curtains before climbing onto the bed next to her and sliding an arm beneath her neck.
‘It’s all right now,’ he said. ‘You’re safe. Go to sleep. I’ll be right here if you feel ill or have a nightmare, or … anything.’
She was silent for a couple of minutes, crying against his shoulder.
‘I’m not going to thank you for saving my life,’ she said. ‘It’s not enough to say it. I’m not even sure how to start. I’ve never in my life been able to trust anyone the way I can trust you. Natasha maybe, but it’s not the same. I owe you everything, Luc. I hate what brought