Take It Back. Kia Abdullah
it with her tongue and licked the sticky substance off her lips.
‘What is up with you anyway?’ She glanced at Jodie in the corner. ‘You’ve been totally deranged lately. I know your mum’s been ill but FFS.’ When Jodie said nothing, Nina sat up in exasperation. ‘Come on. It’s not like she’s got cancer; she’s ill coz she likes to drink. Why should you have to stay home and suffer for it?’
Jodie grimaced. ‘She’s going through a rough patch.’ In truth, she was no worse than usual but Jodie needed a reason to hide.
Nina sighed ostentatiously. ‘Look, I don’t mean to be a bitch. It’s just that there’s nothing to do in this shitty place. I’m bored and I’ve missed you.’
Jodie stirred in surprise. She felt a sudden warmth for her friend, normally so poised and aloof.
‘Christ, don’t get all emosh on me.’ Nina rolled her eyes but then gestured to the bed. ‘Come on, tell me what’s up.’
Jodie walked over and sat gingerly. Nina, for all her bluff and bravado, showed a keen sense of awareness whenever things were wrong. At school, she wielded this power for both good and evil, lending succour to the girls she liked and cruelly skewering those she did not. In year eight, she would pick out the girl who’d started her first period, or the one wearing a bra for the very first time and use it to tease them without mercy. Now, eager to learn what was wrong with Jodie, she honeyed her voice so that it was soft and warm, and encouraged her to speak.
Jodie shifted on the bed, wanting to please her friend but sick at the thought of sharing her story.
Nina placed an arm around her. ‘Come on. Whatever it is, I’ll help you fix it.’
Doubt lanced through Jodie’s stomach, mixing with the dead weight of fear. She opened her mouth to speak, then quickly closed it again. She took two rapid breaths, then gathered her strength and said, ‘You remember Kuli’s party?’
Nina’s interest was piqued, her brows arching over jade green eyes. ‘Yeah. What about it?’
‘At the party, the last time I saw you, you were dancing with that boy from Redbridge.’ Jodie’s words were soft and stilted. ‘After a while I couldn’t find you so I went out to the canal. I felt stupid in your clothes and wanted to be alone. After a while, I heard footsteps.’ Jodie tensed, fearing Nina’s reaction. ‘It was Amir.’
Nina’s face flushed red. ‘Who was he with?’
‘No one.’
Her eyes narrowed. ‘Okaaay. And then?’
Jodie picked at a thread in her quilt. ‘He came up to me and started talking.’
Nina frowned but said nothing.
‘I told him that I couldn’t find you and he said he knew where you were; that you had gone to a private party.’
Nina stiffened. ‘That bastard. What rumours was he spreading about me?’
‘It—it wasn’t about you,’ stuttered Jodie. She searched her friend’s face for clues. Nina acted indifferent to Amir but she had once pondered to Jodie that since both she and Amir had green eyes, their children would certainly inherit them.
Jodie was tempted to backtrack, to bury her worry and tell Nina nothing. But wouldn’t it all be revealed regardless? And wouldn’t Nina be angry that she hadn’t been honest? Jodie laced her hands in her lap and cautiously continued. ‘He told me he would take me to the party. Instead, he took me to this warehouse a few metres down the canal. I don’t know if you know it – the tall one with all the broken windows?’
Nina shrugged impatiently.
‘When we got inside, the others turned up.’
Nina threw her ball against the far wall. ‘They had a party without me? And you were there?’
‘Nina, please, that’s not what happened,’ said Jodie, needing her friend to listen. ‘Hassan, Mo and Farid came out of nowhere. They were all drunk and rowdy.’ There was a catch in her voice and she willed herself to be calm, for Nina couldn’t stand theatrics. ‘They started to tease Amir, egging him on, and he … he started touching me.’
Nina’s eyes grew impossibly wide. Then after a pause of breathless silence, she burst into peals of laughter. ‘Ha, good one!’ She pushed Jodie’s shoulder in jest. ‘You’re such a fucking psycho sometimes but you know what? I fucking love you.’ When she saw that Jodie was silent, her laughter grew shrill. Then, it came to an abrupt stop. ‘Jodie?’
Big glassy tears welled in Jodie’s eyes. ‘They took turns.’
Nina stiffened. ‘Doing what?’ Her voice was suddenly hard. ‘What did they do?’
Jodie pulled her hoodie tight around her body. ‘They raped me.’
Nina’s face grew pink. ‘Jo, tell me you’re kidding.’
Jodie shook her head, blinking quickly so that her tears would spread on lashes and not across her cheeks.
Nina shot up from the bed. ‘What the fuck?’
Jodie registered her anger and worried about what she might do. ‘Nina, please don’t confront them. The police are going to—’
‘You’ve gone to the police?’ Nina’s mouth goldfished open and closed. ‘Jesus Christ, Jodie. Everyone always said you were a freak but I’ve always defended you. What the fuck are you doing?’
Jodie flinched with surprise. ‘That’s not—’
‘Those boys didn’t touch you!’ Nina was suddenly furious. ‘Our whole school knows you’ve been mooning after Amir for years. I’ve seen the way you look at him, the way you sidle up to me when he’s in a three-mile radius just in case he should come up to me and notice that you exist!’
The last three words hit Jodie like blows: a strike to her head, then one to the neck and the last a punch in the stomach.
‘My God,’ spat Nina. ‘How did you come up with something so twisted?’
‘Nina.’ Jodie’s voice was pleading. ‘I’m not making it up.’
‘Look, no one’s going to believe you and you’ll make a fool of yourself, not to mention me who’s always defended you.’ She flung a hand at the door. ‘Does Massi know about this?’
Jodie bridled at Nina’s affectionate name for her mother. ‘Yes,’ she whispered.
‘And?’
Jodie felt her heart contract. ‘She reacted like you.’ She closed her eyes so that hot tears now spilled across her face. She felt her resolve bend beneath the pain almost until it was broken. Desperately, she willed her friend to believe her. She could accept that her mother in a stupor of drink couldn’t see right from wrong, but not that Nina – who had only ever seen Jodie do good – would accuse her now of being a liar.
Noting Jodie’s distress, Nina firmly gripped her shoulders. ‘Look, Jo, I’m not doing this to be a bitch but if your own mother and your own best friend are telling you something, you should listen to them. If you told me that those boys got you in that room and slagged you off or called you names or pushed you around, I would have gone and ripped their fucking heads off. But everyone knows you’ve been in love with Amir for, like, ever. No one’s going to believe you. Plus …’ Nina shrugged, ‘they’re good boys, they pray and they respect their families. No one would believe they’d do what you’re saying – even to a normal girl.’
Jodie’s stomach lurched with a deep-seated anger for trusting her friend.
Nina tossed a glance at the wall clock. ‘Look, it’s getting late. I’ve got to get home. I’ll call you as soon as I get there.’ She leaned forward and planted a kiss on Jodie’s head. ‘We’ll fix this. I promise.’
Jodie