Cross Her Heart. Sarah Pinborough
For Irvine, thank you for having the faith!
HIM
Bitch.
He grips the edge of the paper so tightly the neat lines of carefully written words twist into odd zigzags that crunch some sentences but highlight others, taunting him.
I can’t cope.
You’re too angry.
You frighten me when you hurt me.
I don’t love you any more.
The world is shaking and his breath comes heavily as he scans to the end.
Don’t come after me. Don’t try and find me. Don’t try and find us.
He reads the letter three times before it sinks in. She’s gone. They’re gone. He knows it’s true – he can feel the fresh emptiness in the house – but still he rushes through the rooms, pulling open hollow cupboards and drawers. There is no trace of her, however; no passport or driving licence, none of those important things that frame her life.
Don’t try and find us.
He returns to the kitchen table and crumples the letter, suffocating her words in his clenched fist. She’s right. He is angry. More than angry. He’s raging. It’s a white heat inside him. He stares out through the window, the battered ball of paper damp in his sweating palm. Vodka. He needs vodka.
As he drinks, a seed of a plan takes hold in the dark soil of his mind and starts to grow.
She has no right to do this to him. Not after everything they’ve been through.
He will destroy her for it.
LISA
‘Happy birthday, darling,’ I say, from the doorway. It’s only six thirty and I’m still bleary from sleep, but my kitchen hums with teenage life. It’s like a surging wave hitting me. I don’t remember ever having this much energy. It’s a good feeling. Full of hope and confidence.
‘You didn’t have to get up, Mum. We’re just leaving anyway.’ She’s smiling as she comes to kiss me on the cheek, a cloud of apple shampoo and pink deodorant, but she looks tired. Maybe she’s doing too much. Her GCSEs are coming up and