Her Great Expectations. Joan Kilby
gear. “Maybe she’ll heal you.”
Jack stepped back from the curb as Renita drove off. He watched the red taillights disappear around the corner, then he turned and walked back to the house. He was sure Sienna was highly competent with diseases of the body; possibly she even had knowledge of illnesses of the mind. But his sickness was in his soul.
While he craved company, he shunned true intimacy. He knew that about himself and accepted it with a clear-eyed fatalism. Sure, the love of the right woman might heal him. But what if it didn’t? He was capable of inflicting damage without wanting to, without even being aware he was doing so. His one disastrous attempt at a relationship after Leanne had shown him that.
Anyway, he had an idea Sienna had a wound or two of her own. If they could be friends, maybe they could heal each other.
He stepped onto the path to his door and stopped. She was standing beneath the porch light, her hair a burnished mantle flowing over her shoulders. Her feet were bare. Her shoes and purse dangled from her fingers. In the space of a few hours she’d come all undone. It was a sexy look.
Friendship was a beautiful thing, but he felt a stab of regret for the possibilities he was denying himself.
“The taxi’s on its way,” she said as he climbed the steps to her. She shifted her shoes to her other hand. Glanced up and down the street. She was back to being nervous. “It’s still warm.”
Jack leaned against the pillar supporting the veranda roof. “I’m glad you were able to come tonight after all.”
She glanced at her watch. “I wonder where that taxi is.”
“It’s only a little after twelve.”
“Oliver didn’t know I was going out. I left a note, but I’ve never been gone when he’s come home before.” As if realizing what this told him about her social life, she shrugged and gave him a sheepish grin. “I don’t get out much since my divorce.”
“Was it messy?” he asked, sympathetic.
“No more than most, I suppose.” Her mouth tightened as she glanced away. “Anthony and I talk. Oliver keeps us amicable.”
Why did he get the impression that despite her casual manner, she was hurting inside? “Are you sure you wouldn’t like to join us for golf tomorrow?”
“I’d only slow you down. I’m guessing you’re pretty good, with all the free time you have to spend on sports.” She blushed and tugged on a strand of hair. “Sorry. I didn’t mean that as a dig.”
Maybe not consciously, Jack thought, but he decided not to take offense. Instead, he said mildly, “We don’t play competitively. Renita’s not much more than a novice.”
“Thanks, but it’s the one day of the week I can spend time with Oliver. And I need to make sure he does his homework.”
“Is he a good student?”
“He could be a whole lot better,” she admitted. “He’s smart, but he doesn’t apply himself.”
“Fourteen is a tough age for school. I hated it.”
Sienna’s gaze flicked to his clearly expensive house and back to him. “You really don’t work at anything?”
“Life’s short,” he said flippantly. “I live for pleasure.”
Suspicion clouded her eyes. “Then how do you get money?”
“I’m not a drug dealer. Nothing illegal is going on.”
“But you must have worked at some time in the past.”
“The past is a foreign country. I lost my passport.”
“Mr. Mysterious, eh?” She leaned on the porch railing, studying him. “Are you really content with just hobbies?”
He sensed she wanted to like him. He wasn’t being egotistical to think that. And he was attracted to her. Yet it was clear she couldn’t help judging him. Self-indulgent. Lazy. Hedonistic. He could almost hear the pronouncements flowing through her mind. Those qualities weren’t what she, a doctor, stood for.
“I’m not a bad person,” he said, attempting to make a joke of it. “In fact, you and I operate by the same code—‘First, do no harm.’”
“You don’t do harm by having a job.”
“I had a job once. I ran a light-aircraft charter. I was a pilot. I also built and repaired engines and navigational systems.” He gave her a twisted smile. “A ‘Jack’ of all trades, you could say.”
“That sounds amazing,” she said. “Why did you stop?”
He shrugged. “I got tired of it.”
“Really?” she said, dubious. “Will you ever go back to it?”
“No. Never.” It had been a great job, one he loved. But he’d screwed up big-time. Leanne had paid the price. “Look, it’s best not to have expectations of me. I don’t like to disappoint.”
“Are you warning me off?” Sienna asked.
“No, that’s not it. Not exactly.” But he suspected she had a fairly rigid definition of success and he didn’t meet the criteria.
“It’s okay.” Her glance went past his shoulder. “There’s the taxi.” She bent to slip her shoes back on. From somewhere she found a hair tie and tamed the mass of auburn curls into a ponytail.
“Thanks so much for a wonderful evening, Jack. The food was marvelous. Your friends are lovely.” She was smiling as she circled around him, one foot on the next step down. “I really enjoyed myself.”
“Come again, anytime.”
“Love to.” Her tone was light.
The taxi’s headlights were behind her, so he couldn’t see her expression. Did she mean it, or were her cool gray-green eyes sending another message entirely?
In a way he supposed he had been warning her off. He’d built a comfortable life, one he could live with. His friends understood him—well, as much as anyone could understand someone who didn’t spill his guts at the drop of a hat—and enjoyed him for who he was.
The problem with women was they always thought they could change you. He was quite happy being himself, thank you very much. He didn’t want anyone, not even a redheaded Venus, rocking his carefully balanced boat.
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