Mind Over Clutter. Nicola Lewis
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My name is Nicola Lewis. I’m 44, married to Graham and mum to two fabulous daughters, Amelia and Francesca, who are my absolute world.
I grew up in Walthamstow, in east London, but I now live in a village in rural west Essex, and I just adore my life. I love music and lip syncing (ha ha!), kindness and having fun, and living every single day to the full. But what I’m really passionate about – and what makes me tick – is organising and decluttering. In fact, I enjoy it so much that I’ve made it my business and my life’s mission. And now I want to help you transform your life too and enjoy all the benefits that decluttering brings. Because This Girl Can Organise (TGCO) is all about getting stuff done – with a big smile on your face.
It all started eighteen years ago when I got my first job as an FX (foreign exchange) assistant working for an investment bank in London. I was literally over the moon and loved the idea of being a ‘working girl’, just like Melanie Griffith in the movie of the same name. I wanted the tailored suits and designer bags, the big hair, to be independent, earn my own money and, of course, have fun in all the clubs and bars. My career and salary grew over the years and I was proud to work for some of the biggest investment banks in the City of London.
However, it wasn’t all plain sailing and I encountered a few storms along the way, especially when my first daughter was born. Don’t get me wrong, my career was really important to me, but so was becoming a mum and all the changes that brings. Like most first-time mothers, I wasn’t prepared for this transition, and not only were the back-handed comments from some of my colleagues after I returned to work hard to digest, they also made it difficult for me to focus. Holding down a full-time job while being a parent is never easy and it was probably one of the biggest challenges I’ve ever had to face. It was painful and I felt constantly guilty, trying to do the right thing and please everyone, which in reality was never enough, while constantly comparing myself to others. And although everything appeared to be OK on the outside, inside I was hurting.
The worst thing was that there was nobody I could confide in. I worried that if I talked honestly to people about what I was experiencing, I’d be labelled ‘weak’ and ‘overemotional’ and would be penalised accordingly.
I remember how, on some days, I would head into work feeling really positive, fresh and raring to go, only to find within minutes of arriving in the office that I had to choose between my career and my family. I felt guilty about leaving my family at home, but nobody really cared if you had a child in nursery or you’d snatched just four hours’ sleep the night before – you just had to put on a brave face, carry on, accept your lot and be thankful that at least you had a good job. Even now it makes me feel sad writing this part of my story, and I wish I could go back in time and tell the young mum I was then that there was no need to worry and it would all turn out OK. However, I guess we all have to ride these emotions at some point in our lives.
Those first few years were very tough, and I felt as though I was slowly losing my identity and sense of fun. Every morning I would sit on the train on my way to work, writing lists and schedules. This enabled me to get everything out of my head on to paper and to plan ahead for the week, the month and even the year – anything just to help me smile, feel better about myself and give me something to look forward to. Inside, I felt trapped and I knew there had to be a better way to live, but my husband had just changed careers and was starting off as a freelancer in the entertainment industry and we desperately needed my salary to pay the mortgage and the bills. I felt that I had to make some sacrifices to help build a secure future for my family.
After the birth of my second daughter, I decided it was time for a change. I needed something new and exciting – something I would enjoy doing. So I swapped my old full-time job for a completely different part-time one as Ground VIP Customer Service Assistant for Harrods Aviation at Stansted Airport, looking after private and HNWI (high-net worth individual) clients. Yes, it was a bit random and involved a huge drop in my salary, but this career step was all about being happy and moving towards what the real me was interested in. So, I transferred my skill set from working on bustling trading floors to busy runways for the rich and famous.
For three years I enjoyed my work and had a lot of fun. I really loved meeting new people, being super-organised, professional and smart. Then one day I was approached by an old work colleague and offered a position at an investment bank in Canary Wharf with a big pay cheque and flexible hours. And it was part-time. The dream job, right? Well, actually, wrong. The moment I walked back into that open-plan office I knew I’d made a huge mistake. Yes, I had the right experience and qualifications, but I didn’t have the passion or the