New Year, New Man. Natalie Anderson
and confusion in Josh’s eyes when he looked at his daughter. “How long did your dad ride bulls?”
“I don’t know. Forever,” Claire mumbled. “I think since he was like seventeen or something.”
“That’s only a few years older than you. And how old was he when you were born?”
“Eighteen. My mom was, too.”
“Yeah, well. Take it from someone who knows—young parents don’t always know what they’re doing. Your dad is trying. That has to count for something.”
“Was your mom young when you were born?”
“Nineteen.” Claire sniffed, and Sara dug in her pocket for a tissue. “Here, use this.”
Claire blew hard then said, “She’s really pretty. Your mom. She came to the ranch a few weeks ago. Tried to kick Dad and me out.”
“That sounds like Mom.”
“Are you close with her?”
Sara laughed softly. “Not exactly. You’re changing the subject.”
“I’m good at that.” Claire shifted away from Sara and smiled a little.
“Me, too.” Sara reached out a finger and ran it along Claire’s cheek. “Have you talked to your dad about how hard it’s been here for you?”
Claire shook her head. “I can’t.”
Sara watched her without answering.
“I don’t want to make it a big deal. I guess it’s not that bad,” Claire said with a sigh. “I mean, I like the mountains. And how the air smells. Like it’s...”
“So clean it almost hurts,” Sara finished.
“Exactly.” Claire picked at an invisible spot on her jeans. “And Brandon’s okay.”
“The kid who helps your dad in the barn?”
“He’s fifteen. His family owns the property across the highway. He’s kind of nice.”
“And cute.”
Claire looked up, pink coloring her cheeks as she met Sara’s gaze. “Do you think so?”
“He’s got those great big blue eyes, right?”
Claire sighed. “And that smile. He’ll actually talk to me. But he’s got a girlfriend, I think.”
“You can still hang out when he’s here. Just friends. I bet your dad would love an extra hand in the barn.”
“I don’t know anything about horses.”
“Just like he doesn’t know anything about what teenage girls are into. It’s up to you, but I know your dad does care about you. He wants you around. That counts for something. Maybe if you seemed interested in something he knew about, it could help with that bonding you mentioned.”
“I wouldn’t be in the way?”
Sara smiled. “April and I get in the way. Ryan is always in the way. You’re the one Josh wants around.”
“I think he wants you around, too,” Claire said softly, then asked, “Is Ryan your boyfriend?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Do you have a boyfriend?”
“Nope.”
“Do you want one?”
Josh’s face came to mind, and Sara tried to ignore the shiver that curled through her belly at the thought of his mouth on hers. “I’ve given up on men.”
Claire studied her, looking suddenly older than her thirteen years. “Aren’t you a little young for that?”
“I’m twenty-eight. That’s like one-foot-in-the-grave time in Hollywood.”
Claire nodded as if she understood. “My mom turned thirty-one last year. That’s when she started to freak out. Party more. She gets Botox and some other wacky stuff.” Claire stood and looked in the mirror above the dresser, pinching two fingers to the bridge of her nose. “She said I could have my nose done as a sweet sixteen gift. That’ll be cool. I might look a little more like her and she’ll...”
Sara turned Claire to face her. “Listen to me. You are perfect the way you are. Plastic surgery isn’t going to change your relationship with your mother.”
“You don’t know—”
“I do know. I spent years jumping through hoops to win my mother’s approval. Guess what? Never happened. Maybe it never will. I hope it does for you, Claire. I hope your mom gets healthy and realizes how precious you are to her. Until then, I know your dad loves you. Even if he isn’t great at showing you how much.”
“I just want to fit in here,” Claire said miserably, her green eyes, so like Josh’s, welling again.
“I know, sweetie.”
“Would you take me shopping sometime?” Claire asked. “None of my clothes are right for Colorado, you know?”
Sara thought about the women in Feathers and Floss. “Are you looking for Wranglers and studded belt buckles?”
“No.” Claire laughed. “Just clothes to hang out in. If you don’t have time, I understand.”
Sara gave her a quick hug. “I have time. How about before the weekend? I’ll drive us down to Denver. We can make it a girls’ day out. Go to lunch. Get our nails done.”
“Really?”
“Of course, I may only be able to afford one sock, but we’ll do our best.”
“Dad has money. I could ask if we can use his credit card.”
Sara almost choked from laughing so hard. “I bet he’d love that.” She pushed the hair off Claire’s innocent face. “I pay my own way. But, heck, yeah, we’ll get his card for you. A shopping trip is one thing dads are always good for.”
“Was your dad good for that kind of stuff?”
Sara’s father had been a nameless stuntman on one of her mother’s B movies. An on-set fling for Rose, who hadn’t even told him she was pregnant and had never shared his identity with Sara.
“I don’t know my father.”
“Oh. I guess it’s good that Josh wants me to live with him anyway.”
“He doesn’t like it when you call him Josh.”
Claire grinned. “I know.”
“How much did you see him before this summer?”
“A couple of times a year when he had time off from the tour. He’d come to my school and take me out to dinner. He sent me presents from the road. Lots of stuffed animals and things like that. I’d never been to the rodeo until...” Claire wrapped her arms tight around her chest. “The accident was my fault. Did you know that?”
Sara had read a half-dozen articles about the horrific accident that had ended Josh’s career. It still made her sick to her stomach to think about the images she’d seen on YouTube. But none of the reports had mentioned Claire. “Why do you say that?”
“I was there.” Claire scrunched up her face. “Mom was having a bad time. It was winter break and she was stuck with me. She found out there was an event a few days before Christmas and flew us both down there. I think she wanted to dump me with him for the holidays. She didn’t tell him we were coming. Right before he came out of the gate, he looked up and saw me. It broke his concentration.” Claire drew in a shaky breath. “They let the bull go right at that moment and...” Her voice broke off as she shook her head. “The whole arena was silent when it happened. I thought he was dead. The bull was so big and it landed right on him.”