All I Am. Nicole Helm

All I Am - Nicole Helm


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soul morning, noon and night.

      This day was blowing hard. “Whatever. I’ll go. Can we stop talking about it?”

      “I’m only trying to help. Don’t you want to—”

      She walked away. If she had to hear someone in her family say “do something more” one more time, she might be inclined to throw a punch. Unlike Anna, Mia wouldn’t fight back. She’d look hurt and make Cara feel like a jerk.

      Because that’s what you are.

      Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. She stomped down the hill, leaving Mia behind on the porch. Where was she even going? She couldn’t leave; she’d already promised Mom she’d eat dinner with the family.

      She’d have to pass Dell and the guy he was talking to in order to get to her quiet spot by the creek, but so be it. If they were talking business or farming, Dell wouldn’t give her a second glance. He and Mia had that insanity in common.

      She tried to cut behind them, but a bark distracted her. She glanced at the truck parked next to Mia’s vegetable barn. She recognized that truck and the four dogs in the back.

      Wes. In all his flannelly, bearded glory. What the heck was he doing here? Well, it wouldn’t be hard to find out. “Wes?”

      He turned, eyes wide. “Cara.”

      “Wait, you know my name?” She didn’t recall giving it to him, and he definitely hadn’t asked.

      “You two know each other?”

      Cara gave Dell a brief glance before continuing her examination of Wes’s face. She wondered what he’d look like with a haircut and a shave. She had a sneaking suspicion he might be kind of hot. Luckily, Mountain Man was not her type. “Wes helped me out Saturday when that stupid hair ball attacked me.”

      “Oh. Huh. Well, Wes, unless you have any more questions, you can email us the quantities, and we can bring it to the market when they’re ready.”

      “Yeah, sure.”

      Dell gave her a quizzical look, but she ignored him. “You bring your menagerie everywhere?” she asked Wes.

      “Pretty much.” He had his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his jeans. He didn’t look at her. His eyes were locked on his dogs.

      “Well, I guess I’ll leave you two to chat.” Dell gave her another what the hell? look.

      She shrugged. She wasn’t sure what the hell, either. But Dell left them alone, walking back up the hill to Mia.

      “You make dog treats. What are you doing buying stuff here?”

      “Sweet potatoes,” he said, as if that explained everything.

      “Sweet potatoes?”

      “Organic sweet potatoes. And peas. And carrots. Ingredients. For the dog treats.”

      “Dogs like peas and carrots?”

      “In my treats they do.”

      “Huh.” She cocked her head and studied him at point-blank range. Rumor had it he was not very nice. Considering the way he’d treated Pipsqueak’s owner on Saturday, she’d figured that rumor was true.

      But she wasn’t intimidated. His stiff stance, hard jaw and grizzly appearance just made her wonder what had made him that way. Well, besides war. She inwardly rolled her eyes at herself. War was probably enough.

      But how exactly did a guy go from soldier to organic dog treat maker? It probably wasn’t any of her business, but curiosity was a hard thing for her to ignore, even if she knew her questions would be really, really, really not welcome.

      “I should get going.” He headed toward his truck. Cara followed, and the German shepherd—Phantom, if she remembered right—put his paws on the side of the truck bed and panted at her.

      “Aw. Aren’t you cute?” Cara held out her hand, letting the dog sniff her before patting his head. He gingerly licked her fingers, much to her delight. “He likes me.”

      “He likes everybody,” Wes said gruffly.

      “Aw, cute little baby.” She trailed her palm over his head, then scratched the soft fur behind his ears. “Aren’t you the sweetest?”

      He gave her a tentative lick on the chin. When she looked at Wes, he was staring at her. Intently.

      * * *

      WATCHING PHANTOM LICK Cara was weird. Like thinking-about-being-the-one-doing-the-licking weird.

      So not normal.

      Which seemed about right. He hadn’t been normal possibly ever. His brief foray into romantic relationships in high school had ended in disaster. So he steered clear of women who made him feel anything. At least then he didn’t have to be a laughingstock.

      And, in all honesty, aside from his market days, he steered clear of all people. Not just women. Everyone.

      Needing to get out of here and fast, Wes opened the back of the truck to get the dogs into the cab. “Move it, guys.”

      Phantom, Flash and Toby obeyed and hopped off the bed, then into the truck cab. Sweetness, the little jerk, jumped on Cara’s legs, pawing and yipping happily until Cara slid into a sitting position on the ground. Then Sweetness curled up right on her lap.

      Toby and Flash jumped out of the truck and sniffed around Cara suspiciously. Only Phantom continued to obey the order, though he looked on from the passenger side window. If dogs had complex human emotions, Wes was pretty sure Phantom’s would be wistful. Or longing. Or something.

      Yeah, his head definitely wasn’t screwed on right. “Get off her, you morons. In the truck.”

      “Aw, they’re sweet. Our dog died a few years ago, and Dad hasn’t had the heart to replace her. I miss her.”

      He liked the way she smiled at the dogs, the way she let Sweetness on her lap without hesitation even though the dog was getting dusty paw prints all over her skintight jeans. And she was right—the dogs did like her. Of course, they weren’t exactly picky.

      “All right, kiddos, do as your daddy says.”

      “Um, no. I am not their daddy. They are dogs. I am a man.”

      Cara grinned up at him. “Thanks for the animal kingdom lesson. I figured a guy who took his dogs everywhere with him would think of himself as a daddy.”

      “No.”

      This time Cara laughed, a low, sultry sound that made him think about making her laugh more often.

      A joke in itself. He didn’t know how to make anyone laugh, let alone a pretty woman. Just looking at her legs folded across each other made his hip ache.

      She stood up, and Sweetness whined after her. “Aw, she loves me.”

      “In you go.” Wes gave her collar a gentle tug until Sweetness jumped into the back with the others.

      He turned to face Cara. “She likes women better than men. Except for me. Usually.” Looking down at her bright red mouth and blue-green eyes, he felt a stirring in his gut that had not been there in a very long time.

      Attraction. Interest. And, weirdly, it didn’t come followed by panic.

      Didn’t matter. Not allowed. So he turned and climbed up into his truck, Sweetness yipping in his ear, trying to get close to the open window and Cara.

      Cara hopped up on the stair. Again. “You’re trying to convince me I need a puppy, aren’t you, little girl?” She leaned in his window. Again. Second time in a week this strange woman was poking into his personal space.

      She reached for the dog, letting Sweetness lick her hand. Which put her breasts about two inches from his face. Uhh.

      When she pulled back, she seemed to realize how weird that had been.


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