Modern Romance May 2015 Books 1-8. Кейт Хьюит
frown dividing her brows, Chrissie made an instinctive move forward and rested her hand soothingly on his forearm, feeling the muscles that were pulled whipcord tight with fierce tension. ‘I’m sorry, Jaul.’
As if he found her touch unbearable, Jaul shifted back a defensive step. ‘For what are you sorry? That I was too much of a fool to appreciate that my father would say or do anything to wreck my marriage?’ he framed with unleashed bitterness. ‘Chrissie, I would’ve trusted him with my life! He was a difficult man and very controlling but in many of the ways that mattered he was a good father.’
Discomfited by his rejection of her sympathy, Chrissie stiffened. ‘And you loved him, of course you did. I loved my mother when I was a child even though I had a pretty miserable childhood. Parents don’t have to be perfect to be loved. But I still don’t understand why your father stayed so dead set against his own mother and me when he knew your grandfather was the one at fault.’
‘My father chose the easy way out. He was never going to admit the embarrassing truth. If he laid the blame of cultural differences at his mother’s door, he could continue to idolise his father and believe that he was right to protect me from all Western influences.’ Jaul’s brilliant dark eyes veiled. ‘Apparently he was afraid that I may have inherited Tarif’s fatal weakness for women. I was finally able to understand why I had to rebel against him to gain the right to study in the UK.’
Chrissie was listening closely. ‘You had to...rebel? You never told me that before.’
‘I was ashamed of it. I was raised to believe that a decent son always respects a parent’s greater maturity and wisdom,’ Jaul admitted grudgingly. ‘After the experience of a military boarding school followed by army life, I longed for the freedom to make my own choices.’
‘Of course you did,’ she whispered feelingly, newly aware of what a domineering old tyrant his late father had been. ‘And I respect you more for having taken a stand and it’s hardly surprising that you went a little wild when you first started university. I never appreciated how restricted your life had been before you came to the UK.’
Jaul studied her lovely face fixedly, the turquoise eyes soft with compassion. He was shaken that she was still trying to comfort him when he didn’t deserve comfort because he had let her down worst of all. ‘But that period of going wild almost cost me you,’ he pointed out. ‘It gave you the wrong impression.’
Tears stung her eyes and she blinked them back in desperation as she sat down on the flat tiled edge of a fountain. ‘There was no way I was going to resist you for ever...the attraction was too strong.’
‘I have never wanted any woman as much as I wanted you,’ Jaul admitted in a raw undertone and he bent over the tray stationed on a table by a pillar to fill a glass and extend it to her. ‘I have never loved any woman but you...’
At that statement, her hand shook a little as she accepted the glass, hastily sipping the cool sweetness of fruit juice. He had never loved anyone else, she was thinking, that surely had to be a point in her favour.
His lean, darkly handsome features were grim and taut with tension. In a restive, uncertain gesture he raked long, elegant fingers through his luxuriant hair, tousling it. ‘I loved you yet I let you down. You were alone and pregnant and I wasn’t with you. I accepted my father’s lies.’
Chrissie’s heart was thumping very hard. ‘Jaul—what’s brought all this on tonight?’
‘Yusuf was with my father when he visited you in Oxford. His conscience was uneasy and he was eager to clear it,’ Jaul recounted flatly. ‘I was appalled when Yusuf described what happened that day. It shames me that my father could have treated my wife in such a way and that I was unable to prevent it from happening.’
The backs of her eyes were gritty with tears because she was remembering what had been one of the worst days of her life. Confronted by King Lut, she had felt alone and helpless, not to mention devastated by her father-in-law’s complete rejection of her as his son’s wife. ‘You were in hospital,’ she reminded him shakily. ‘There was nothing you could have done.’
‘Yusuf told me the truth.’ Jaul was ashen below his dark skin, his brilliant eyes tortured as he gazed at her. ‘But let us be honest here—Yusuf told me truths which I should’ve accepted when you spoke them.’
‘Yes,’ Chrissie cut in to confirm without hesitation. ‘I have never lied to you...’ A split second of silence fell before she coloured and added, ‘Well, only once and I’ll sort that out later.’
‘I swallowed my father’s lies about you and in my bitterness and hurt I learned to distrust my every memory of you. When I came back to find you last month, I should have listened more, thought deeper.’
‘Naturally you trusted your father’s word when he told you that I’d taken the money and run.’
‘How was it natural?’ His tone derisive in emphasis, Jaul set down her glass with a definite crack. Dark eyes flaming gold, he studied her, nostrils flaring, beautiful stubborn mouth tight at the corners with strain. ‘You were my life. You were my wife. My first loyalty should always have been to you. Will you please stop trying to make excuses for my failure to support you when you most needed me?’ he demanded hoarsely. ‘I let you down in every way possible—’
‘Your father did this to us. He separated us, lied to us both and hurt us both,’ Chrissie responded shakily. ‘Put the blame where it belongs, Jaul. You were in a coma and then you had surgery and were struggling to recuperate. You weren’t in any condition to fight my corner or yours. When your father lied to you then, you were very vulnerable—’
‘I’m trying to say sorry, trying to grovel but you won’t let me,’ Jaul muttered unevenly, his eyes suspiciously bright.
‘I don’t want you grovelling. I don’t want your guilt—’
‘This is not guilt, this is...shame,’ he labelled roughly. ‘You are my wife and I let you down and I don’t want to lose you. There’s nothing I won’t do or say to keep you as my wife!’
Recognising his increasingly emotional frame of mind, Chrissie almost smiled. ‘Oh, I think I worked that out straight after that pre-nuptial agreement was stuffed beneath my nose when I looked as though I might be ready to walk away from you,’ she confided.
‘It was an empty threat,’ Jaul confessed grittily. ‘A pre-nup has no standing as yet in a British court of law. In addition you signed it without the benefit of independent legal advice and you were very young at the time. I knew that the pre-nup wasn’t worth the paper it was written on.’
It was Chrissie’s turn to be taken aback. As she had listened her eyes had widened and her soft mouth had hardened. ‘I should’ve called your bluff. But maybe I didn’t fight more because I didn’t want to. Has that occurred to you?’
His lush black lashes swept up and down over his frowning eyes. ‘But why would you have behaved that way?’
Chrissie stiffened, reluctant to give him the words of love that were as effective as chains in binding her to both him and the twins. He knew the truth now about his father, her pride and her sense of justice finally satisfied. He knew what she had endured and he knew that she had not accepted a financial settlement in lieu of their supposedly invalid marriage. Keen to change the subject of why she was being so tolerant of his stubborn misjudgements, she said with forced lightness of tone, ‘Who on earth lit all these candles?’
‘Zaliha supplied the candles and the snacks. I lit them. The fountains have been kept in good working order and only had to be switched on. I couldn’t allow any other female staff in here because they would have been very much shocked by the murals.’
Chrissie scanned the hundreds of candles and hid a smile, touched by the effort he had made on her behalf. ‘The murals may be shocking but this place is beautiful all lit up like this.’
The beginnings