Finding Dr. Right. Lisa B. Kamps
go out somewhere, get something to drink and maybe have some fun. Unless you have something against having fun, that is.” Nathan had meant the last comment jokingly and was surprised when her expression turned even gloomier. She bit down on her lower lip then hesitantly looked over at him, her dark eyes wide and sad.
“Why do you think I have something against having fun?”
“What?” Nathan stared at her, surprised to hear her voice waver when she repeated the question. A horn blared behind them and he muttered to himself before turning onto a side street. There were no empty spots here to pull into, so he double-parked before turning his full attention on her.
“I don’t, you know.” Her voice was small and soft, nearly lost in the underlying noise that made up Baltimore’s nights. She cleared her throat and sat up straighter, and Nathan had the distinct impression that she was trying not to squirm. “I think our ideas of fun are probably just different, I guess.”
“Oh, yeah? So, what’s your idea of fun?” Nathan asked. She shrugged one small shoulder, refusing to look at him. He took a deep breath and looked around, then smiled. Without a word he put the car in gear and drove off.
“Where are we going?”
“To have some fun.”
The smell of beer and Old Bay rushed from the open door and mixed with the damp smell of the harbor, creating an aroma that was both bitter and appealing. Catherine wrinkled her nose and pushed a hand against her rumbling stomach as Nathan led her through the crowded bar to a back table that was barely large enough to seat one person. He pulled the chair out for her then commandeered another for himself, sitting too close for comfort.
“Do you like steamed shrimp?” Nathan’s voice was a warm whisper against her ear, causing a shiver to work its way through her. She tried to pull away, to put some distance between them, but there was no room to move. She swallowed against the lump in her throat and nodded, then sighed when Nathan stood and walked to the bar. It was hard not to notice the stares he attracted, including her own.
Catherine pulled her gaze away and looked around the smoky room, taking in the anonymous faces of the crowd and wondering again why she was there. Nathan had said nothing about their destination, only smiled when she asked. It had been a bit of a surprise when he wheeled the sports car down the cobblestone streets of Fells Point and led her into the waterfront bar famous for its steamed shrimp. She had heard about it before, of course, but this was her first time there. It made her think about other things she had missed out on.
What was with her tonight, she wondered. Every thought working its way into her mind was dismal, morose and depressing. If she wasn’t careful, she’d turn into an old biddy with no life. Not like she had much of one as it was…
Catherine rubbed her hands along her arms and tried to warm herself against the inner chill that threatened to take over. Too much of her time lately had been devoted to Matty. No, she corrected, not her time. Her life. She would never trade those moments for anything, but with Matty discovering a life outside their world, it made her wonder what was left for her.
“You okay?”
Catherine jerked around, surprised to see Nathan sitting next to her, surprised that she had been so deep in thought that she hadn’t noticed his return to the table. She nodded and offered him what she hoped was a passable smile then accepted the mug of beer he held out for her.
“Our shrimp will be ready in a few minutes.” He motioned to the mug in her hand. “I wasn’t sure what you wanted to drink. Is beer okay? I can get you something else—”
“No, this is fine.” She took a small sip to prove her point then sat the mug in front of her, running a finger around the smooth edge of the glass.
“Are you sure you’re okay? You look…preoccupied.”
“Just thinking.” Catherine shrugged, not wanting to look at him but watching him from the corner of her eye as if some force drew her attention to him. He was sitting so close to her she could feel the heat of his legs next to hers, the occasional brush of his foot against her own. Tall, well-built and confident, his presence was nearly overwhelming. People in the bar stopped to look at him, noticed him when he did nothing more exciting than sit there. Catherine shifted in the wooden chair, wondering if people actually recognized him or if they merely reacted to the energy that surrounded him.
“Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. We can leave—”
Catherine reached out and closed her hand over his arm to stop him from standing and shook her head, trying to ignore the vibrant heat that sent a jolt tingling through her where her flesh met his. She heard the words coming from her mouth, unable to stop them. “No, please. I want to stay.”
Nathan glanced at the pale, shaking hand on his arm, then into Catherine’s brown eyes and saw the wariness swimming in their dark depths. He took a deep breath to protect himself from the vulnerability that trembled through her and tried to offer her a carefree smile. The expression felt stiff on his face, must have looked stiff, too, because she suddenly removed her hand and looked away, a tinge of pink fanning her cheeks.
“I’m sorry. You’re right. Maybe we should leave.” She grabbed her purse and pushed her chair back, rising so quickly she stumbled. Nathan reached out and grabbed her, wanting only to steady her. His hand closed around her arm but instead of helping her, the contact stole whatever was left of her balance and she tumbled straight into his lap. The breath rushed out of Nathan in a hiss as her purse connected solidly with his left knee; a thousand needles of pain shot through his leg.
“Oh, God. Oh, God. I am so sorry. I didn’t mean…Oh, God!” Catherine tried to scramble from his lap and elbowed him in the stomach, stepping on his foot in her hurry. He reached out, wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her back to his lap, mostly to stop her from inflicting any more damage.
“Catherine, stop. It’s okay. I’m okay. Just…don’t hit me again. Please.” He felt her body stiffen against him at the laughter in his voice, then realized she was shaking. He tried to shift her weight so he could see her face, thinking that she was finally laughing. A jolt clenched his stomach when he saw that she was doing her best not to cry.
“Oh, damn,” he muttered. He looked around, realized there was no one who could explain why this woman was suddenly crying and felt completely helpless. She wiped at the single tear rolling down her face, refusing to look at him as he awkwardly patted her shoulder. He searched his mind for something to say, something to do, and came up blank. “Catherine?”
“I’m sorry. I’m fine. I’m sorry.” She jumped from his lap and took a few steps away from him, then suddenly turned and raced out the door before he could stop her. He stared at the spot where she had been then shook his head in confusion.
Nathan motioned to the bartender to cancel the shrimp order then walked out the door, wondering what he had done to upset Catherine so much. He looked around, finally seeing her standing against the wrought-iron railing set up along the water’s edge. She stood just outside the ring of light that fell from the street lamp but he could see that she was no longer crying. Her back stiffened at his approach but she refused to turn around.
“Are you all right?”
Silence.
“Um, did I do something to upset you?”
More silence. Nathan shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and shifted awkwardly, not knowing what to say or do. He stared out over the still water, watching the lights across the harbor twinkle on the black surface.
“I’m sorry if I did something to upset you.”
“No, I’m the one who should be sorry. It’s nothing you did.” The whispered words were choked with emotion as she glanced at him then quickly looked away. “I guess I’m not used to…I mean, it’s been awhile since I’ve gone anywhere and…”
Catherine’s voice trailed off awkwardly and Nathan leaned closer to get a better look. Her eyes