The Affair. Amanda Brooke
it was deserted.
I stayed close to a wall that had an overhanging roof to give me some shelter, and the sound of the rain hammering against the tiles was so loud I didn’t hear him come outside, not until he’d sneaked up next to me.
‘Looking for an escape route?’
I was looking out over the canal, watching it trembling in the rain. I was trembling almost as much, if I’m being honest, and I wouldn’t look at him when I said, ‘You too?’
‘Yeah, this kind of thing is my idea of hell. I could do with a stiff drink.’
‘So could I,’ I said. OK, maybe I was only trying to sound older, but I really could have done with a drink.
‘It’s school tomorrow.’
‘Don’t remind me.’
‘Your schooldays will be over before you know it, Scarlett. And in spite of all the stress with exams, I bet it’ll be one of the best years of your life. It was for me.’
‘You can remember that far back?’
He laughed. ‘You’re growing up fast, aren’t you?’
It was a comment I’d heard loads of times, usually from older men who were staring at my boobs, but he just looked out across the water. I can remember wanting him to look at me. I took a deep breath so my chest would stick out more, and made a pout. ‘Who says I’m not already?’
‘Fed up being treated like a child?’
‘Or ignored completely. Everyone’s too busy worrying about Liam.’
‘Oh, you’re not ignored, Scarlett.’
‘You think? For the last hour it’s been all about Liam and how he should get out more. I’m sure Mum thinks he’s going to hack into some government network from his bedroom and bring the country down. Either that or she’s worried he’ll never leave home and she’ll be stuck with him for ever.’
‘He’ll be fine.’
‘I know he’ll be fine,’ I said through gritted teeth. ‘The point is I don’t care.’
‘So what do you care about? What would make you happy, Scarlett?’
I liked the way he talked to me, like he was really interested in what I had to say, like I had an opinion that mattered. I could have told him that what I wanted most was to be noticed instead of gawped at all the time, but I’m pretty sure he knew that.
I didn’t actually get the chance to say anything because just then a gust of wind caught the rain and blew it towards us. I turned to the side but he stepped in front of me, like he was protecting me. When I turned back to face him, I was too scared to look up.
‘Are you getting wet?’ he asked, whispering the last word.
He’d put his hand on the wall next to me, blocking me in and I had no idea what to do next. I’d had boys making crude comments before, but this was way different. For one thing, I most definitely wanted the attention this time. OK, I knew it was bad and Mum would be horrified if she knew, but I’d been dreaming of being this close to him. And in my fantasies we’d gone way further. But I wasn’t expecting it to happen for real and that’s why I panicked. ‘I’d better go,’ I told him.
‘That’s a shame,’ he said. ‘I thought we were kindred spirits for a moment, Scarlett. My mistake.’
He lowered his arm and trailed a finger down my arm, which sent this weird electric current through my body. It felt so strong that it seriously made me flinch.
‘Sorry,’ he said quickly. ‘You should go.’
I didn’t move, and I suppose I was curious more than anything. It was like I had this power over him. He was tempted to do something he shouldn’t, something that was very, very bad, and it was all because of me.
I looked up and whispered, ‘Or I could stay.’
I was actually daring him to move closer and I couldn’t believe it when he did. He pushed against me and it wasn’t the first time I’d felt someone with a hard on, but that had only been Linus and I don’t think he had a clue what to do with it. This was a man and he definitely knew what to do. He took hold of my hand and later he told me exactly what he had been tempted to do, but at the time he was being the perfect gentleman. He kissed my palm. ‘Run away, little girl,’ he said.
And I did run away, but I can’t tell you how much I regretted it. I played that scene over and over again in my mind afterwards and I swore that next time, I wasn’t going to let him off so easily.
The Accusations
Nina’s head was throbbing but she didn’t have the energy to move from the breakfast bar to search out painkillers. Rubbing her temples, she suspected the intense pressure around her forehead had been caused by all those months of sticking her head in the sand. How had she not seen this coming?
There had been plenty of signs that Scarlett was heading for trouble, if only Nina hadn’t been so preoccupied with proving to the world, and Sarah especially, that everything was fine. If she had been worried about anything, it had been Liam and his complete withdrawal from society. She couldn’t have named one of his friends, whereas she had met most of Scarlett’s, or the girls at least. Her daughter had been more circumspect about introducing her male friends, but as it turned out, Scarlett hadn’t been as interested in boys as Nina had presumed. At what point had she fallen for this man who had got her pregnant, the man who had abused her? Had Nina met him? Did she know him? According to Scarlett, he was going to support her, just as soon as he had told his wife.
Groaning, Nina dropped her head on the counter. His wife. She knew what Sarah thought, but what she was suggesting was unthinkable. She was wrong; except, no matter how many times Nina repeated this mantra, a seed of doubt had taken root in her mind and it was growing at an alarming rate.
She reminded herself that she was still in a state of shock. It was going to take a day or two for the news to sink in, and whatever happened next, it would ultimately be Scarlett’s decision. Her daughter would need to know what support her family, and Nina in particular, were willing to offer. Bryn had given no view on what Scarlett should do, but he didn’t disagree when Nina had said any ideas Scarlett might have about keeping the baby were utterly ridiculous. But this was an alien world she found herself in and stranger things had happened.
She had wasted too much time the day before, paralysed by fear while Scarlett and Liam hid away in their rooms. Bryn had been at a loss how to help, but had eventually got the message that his wife needed space too, and she had been relieved when he had gone out to work on Sunday evening. But the moment he had returned that morning and slipped into her bed, Nina had got up. She didn’t want to talk to him, she didn’t know what to say and, more tellingly, she hadn’t wanted him to touch her.
Was she really as blind as Sarah seemed to think? Had she been taken for a fool and willingly put her family at risk? Was everything her heart had been telling her a lie?
With her head spinning, Nina tried to straighten up and as she did, the overhead spotlights blazed into life. She wasn’t sure who was more shocked, her or Bryn.
‘I thought you’d left for work,’ he said when he had caught his breath.