Secret Admirer. Karen Rose Smith

       THREE

      She squeezed her eyes shut. The fluorescent lights bored into her head. It throbbed with pain. All she could think about was Eva. What Anna said confirmed the truth in her mind. Eva never made it home. Someone kidnapped her like they’d tried to do to Rachel. What did these men want with them?

      So far, after looking at dozens of photos of criminals for hours, the man who attacked her wasn’t among them—at least as far as she could tell. All she had to go on was his eyes, but they left a lasting impression.

      Noah promised to find Eva. As the hours slipped away, she struggled to hold on to that promise.

      Holy Father in Heaven, please bring my schweschder home safely.

      She’d lost so much in her life. Noah. Her daed. Daniel. The baby. At times, it felt as if the pain in her heart would be there to stay. She couldn’t lose her sister, too.

      Against her will, she remembered that fateful day. She and Daniel were heading home from the bulk foods store. To this day, she still didn’t know what spooked the mare. Daniel was thrown. He’d died before he reached the hospital. When her doctor visited her some time later, he delivered another blow. Losing their unborn baby was just the beginning. He’d told her the damage to her body was too great. She would not likely be able to have another child.

      Something brushed against her hand. Rachel’s eyes snapped open. A Styrofoam coffee cup sat next to her. She glanced up. Noah was there.

      “I thought you could use a break.” He smiled, and she noticed his facial cuts from the glass had been bandaged. He pulled out the chair next to hers.

      “Denki,” she murmured and took a sip. Strong coffee. Something she rarely drank anymore. Daniel was the coffee drinker in the family. Since his passing, she couldn’t bring herself to prepare it for herself.

      “How are you holding up?” he asked, keeping a careful watch on her face.

      Truthfully, she was barely hanging on. “I feel so helpless. I need to be doing something. I can’t sit here looking at these photos any longer while Eva is missing.” She shook her head. “She could be hurt, Noah. Maybe a car struck her on the way home, and she’s lying out there frightened and alone. I am supposed to watch out for her. My mamm entrusted her well-being to me.” Not since losing Daniel had she felt such turmoil in her heart.

      Noah covered her hand with his. “We have all our people looking for her. They’re combing the road between the Lapp place and yours. We’ll find her.” His gentle answer washed over her, and she pulled in a breath. Gazing into his eyes, she believed him. Noah was a gut man. He would do what he could to fulfill his promise and bring Eva home.

      As she studied his handsome face, the past and all its shattered dreams rose in her heart like a barrier between them. At seventeen, she had been so sure her future belonged with Noah. It didn’t matter how many times her mamm tried to get her to see the differences standing between them. She’d been so foolish back then, blinded to the truth while her heart had believed that with Noah at her side they could conquer any obstacle in their way, including their differences in faith.

      But the past had no place between them anymore.

      She studied his handsome face. While his blue eyes were as she remembered, fine lines fanned out around them. Grooves circled his mouth. She wondered about his life now. Was he married? Happy?

      “I’ve been so worried about Eva that I haven’t thought to ask how you’ve been.”

      Dark blond brows shot up. Time slipped by before he answered. “I’ve been okay, I guess. Busy. This job is fulfilling in many ways.” A strange answer. He stopped, and she wondered if perhaps in just as many ways it was not.

      “I meant what I said earlier. I am sorry about Ezra. He was like a dad to me for a long time. I learned a lot about farming from Ezra when I was too stubborn to listen to my father.” A hint of a smile lifted the corners of his mouth, not reaching his eyes. “And I was sorry to hear about your husband, as well,” he added quietly.

      The strain between them now was something the younger Rachel could not have imagined. They were like two strangers. She glanced at his hand on hers. He didn’t wear a wedding band. Had he ever married?

      Rachel thought about her years with Daniel. At times, it was hard to believe he was gone. So many things changed forever with his death. The buggy accident that took his life scarred her deeply and she still struggled to accept Daniel’s death and her injuries as part of Gott’s plan. The future and its promises had evaporated that day.

      When the silence between them grew uncomfortable, she asked the question she was curious about. “How did you know about Daniel?”

      “Isaac. We still keep in touch. He and I go hunting together several times a year, and I help him with his planting like I used to with your dad.”

      She looked away, surprised by the admission. When he’d left, Rachel had thought Noah had shut both her and the Amish ways out of his life, and yet he kept in touch with Isaac. He just hadn’t wanted her.

      Before she could think of anything to say, someone came into the room. The sheriff motioned to Noah. From his grim expression, she was sure something terrible had happened.

      Noah stepped out of the room. Her heart accelerated. Please, Gott, do not let it be Eva.

      Time seemed to stop while her last conversation with Eva came to mind.

      Can you believe it, Rachel? Soon, I will be teaching at the same shool where you and I attended as kinner. I cannot imagine doing anything else. Eva’s eyes lit up every time she spoke about the future.

      Perhaps someday you will meet a man like Hannah Wagler did and fall in love, Rachel had teased.

      Her sister had blushed and eventually giggled before changing the subject. At the time, Rachel hadn’t thought much about it. Now she wondered if perhaps Eva had kept parts of her life secret even from Rachel.

      When Hannah first came to Eva and mentioned her plans to marry Isaac Yoder, the bishop’s sohn, come November, Eva could not believe that the community leaders would select her to train as Hannah’s replacement.

      Her sister pored through all of Hannah’s past issues of the Blackboard Bulletin, an Amish teachers’ magazine. Eva could not wait to complete her apprenticeship.

      Noah came back in. The sight of him had her jumping to her feet. “Is there news?” she asked while trying to glean something from his expression.

      He hurried to her side. “We haven’t located her,” he said as if reading her thoughts.

      “But you know something.” She could see it in his eyes.

      “Yes, we found this.” He held up something in a plastic bag. Rachel’s hand covered her mouth. It was Eva’s quilted bag. She had had it with her at the church service.

      “You recognize it,” Noah confirmed.

      She nodded. “It belongs to Eva. I made it for her seventeenth birthday six months ago. She took it with her wherever she went. Where did you find it?”

      “Not far from where the men forced us off the road.” He paused a moment.