Miss Cameron's Fall from Grace. Helen Dickson
tears not far away, Delphine nodded, unable to stop herself from telling her mother every sordid detail of what had happened to her. In the telling, she remembered when Lord Fitzwaring had taken her a second time, how she had stilled, knowing the struggle was over. He was the victor—though against a smaller opponent. She had known the relief of it, and in doing so had become aware of the smooth firmness of his flesh, his perfect body above hers, the strange attraction she felt for him and her own insatiable desire.
The end of tension from the struggle had given her a strange physical thrill. She’d realised with horror that despite her rigid self-control during visits to the bordello, she could fall prey to sensual delight as easily as the woman she had observed making love to a stranger; she had understood in that instant that men and women were drawn to each other for the sensations they could enjoy. If a man or woman found delight in the sensations, this was part of the way they had been created, part of nature’s law, and could not therefore be considered unnatural. But her mother would not see it that way.
Lady Cameron listened in horror to the words that tumbled from her daughter’s mouth. For a moment, only utter shock and uncertainty registered on her face. Then her eyes began to gleam as they had done on the day her eldest daughter had married Lord Rundell and her whole expression changed, leaving her face blank, but decisive. Behind the mask of dignified respectability, the ambitious mother had taken over, greedy for her children and determined both to avoid a scandal and to make the best out of an intolerable situation.
‘The man is a colonel, you say, in Wellington’s army. What else? Is he rich? Titled? What?’
‘He is Lord—Lord Stephen Fitzwaring. That is all I know about him.’
‘Your behaviour was reckless and totally irresponsible. Now you must pay the price. He will have to marry you, of course—and he will, if he is a gentleman, which I am beginning to doubt.’
Delphine had never seen her mother’s face as it was then. Her eyes were hard, looking through Delphine as if she were a whore rather than her own daughter. Her eyes dropped to Delphine’s waist and then back to her face.
‘What if there is a child? Have you considered that?’
A cold, dreadful shock seized Delphine’s every nerve and the blood drained from her face. In her innocence she had not thought of this; lying beneath Colonel Fitzwaring, she had not considered the full consequences of his act.
When Delphine opened her mouth to speak, her mother held up her hand, quivering with fury and indignation. ‘Be quiet. What you have done is nothing short of wicked. It pains me to say it, you—you Jezebel. I shudder to think how your father will react to this. You are a disgrace.’
John Cameron was a short, stocky man of Scottish descent, with whitening tawny hair and a temper that was easily roused. He was summoned right away and when he’d heard what his wife had to say, his anger was like an explosion.
‘I always knew no good would come of your visiting that orphanage—however good your intentions. No,’ he blustered, red to the ears and puffing out his barrel chest, ‘you’ve made your bed. Lie on it. You are absolutely ruined unless the man marries you. You do realise that, don’t you, Delphine?’
She straightened up and looked directly at her father. ‘I have made a mistake, a grievous and awful mistake, and I will have to live with the consequences—but marriage?’
‘Absolutely. Thank God the man’s credentials are fitting.’
‘He won’t marry me.’
‘We’ll see about that. If Fitzwaring thinks he can ruin my good name by seducing one of my daughters and then go flitting off back to Spain, he is grievously mistaken. He’ll pay for it; I’ll make damned sure of that.’
Helplessness, bleak as the grave, descended on Delphine, but she was powerless to speak, powerless to stand against the combined forces of her parents when their minds were made up.
Two days later her father summoned her. Fully expecting another scolding, she proceeded to her father’s study, patting her hair into place. He was standing with his back to the fireplace.
‘Come in, Delphine.’ He nodded towards the tall man looking out of the window with his back to her. With his feet planted firmly apart, his hands behind his back, attired in his military uniform of scarlet jacket and white trousers, he stood stiff and unyielding. ‘You are already acquainted with Colonel Fitzwaring, of course.’
Delphine’s heart gave a fearful leap. Her initial surprise at her father’s summons was stirred into a sudden tumult of emotions by Colonel Fitzwaring’s presence. He turned and looked at her with those incredible midnight-blue eyes of his. The glare of his red jacket hurt her eyes; for one wild, unreasoning moment her life flared into vivid, lively colour, her familiar surroundings fading away into the background. She was conscious of an unwilling excitement. In fact, much to her annoyance, she was very much aware of everything about him—the long, strong lines of his body, the skin above the jacket, tanned and healthy—and she was surprised to see faint lines of weariness on his face.
Conscious of those searing eyes on her, with trembling fingers she clutched the neck of her gown, remembering that dark gaze and its seeming power to strip the clothes from her, leaving her body bare. Yes, she remembered him. She knew him by her own response to him—needle-sharp chills—but there was no sign of her lover of three nights ago.
In an atmosphere bristling with tension, with an effort she said, in the coldest and most condescending manner, ‘Yes, we are. Good day, Lord Fitzwaring.’
‘Miss Cameron.’ He bowed, and there was a touch of irony in his mocking tone as he lowered his shining dark head.
Stephen’s blood was pumping through his veins. He had not expected Lord Cameron to deliver such a robust lecture on the rules he felt Stephen had broken. As a result Stephen was alert; his consciousness was fine-honed as a sharp blade. The black pinpoints of his dark-blue eyes shot fire.
Delphine had never seen such a look in a man’s eyes before. It reminded her of sparks shooting from the glow of a fire. His presence filled the room. He didn’t speak. Waiting, Delphine shivered. Silence was a weapon, she realised, and there were men who knew how to use it to deadly effect. Stephen Fitzwaring was one such man. It seemed no one was prepared to speak in his presence unless spoken to. He had the dynamism of a military commander and he was using silence aggressively, to assert his power.
‘You are here because my father asked you to come. Is that not so, Lord Fitzwaring?’
‘It is. You are well, I trust?’
Delphine actually flinched at the cold, ruthless fury in his eyes as they raked over her. She did not want to disappoint her father now, having decided the moment she’d set eyes on Colonel Fitzwaring to keep her composure, but the effort of holding herself in check in the presence of this arrogant man was too much.
‘As you see,’ she replied icily, suspecting he would rather face the full might of Napoleon’s army than be present at her home today, ‘I have survived our last encounter without scars.’ This was hardly the truth, but she would not grant him the satisfaction of telling him so.
The impact of his gaze was no less potent for the distance between them. He took a step closer, his powerful, animal-like masculinity assaulting her senses. Melting inwardly, she felt her traitorous body offer itself to this man; in that moment they both acknowledged the forbidden flame that sparked between them, both angered by their inability to control it. He raised one well-defined eyebrow, watching her, a half-smile now playing on his lips. He seemed to know exactly what was going on in her mind.
But Stephen would have none of it. The army was of the utmost importance to him—he had no time for marriage and affairs of the heart. A man who loved too well was vulnerable. Certainly he yielded to the desires of the flesh as much as the next man. Many women had passed through his life—some had faded from memory and a few he had felt affection for, but never doted on, excepting one, a beautiful, callous and treacherous woman, whom he had left with the bitter belief that love was only for the