Never Christmas Without You. Reese Ryan
until you tell me.”
“Sheila? Have you forgotten that she is a lesbian?”
Good point. But she might still be willing to help out her boss. Although, that wasn’t ideal. Because then Sheila would really be lying. Plus, the two of them would have no chemistry and it would show.
“Okay, so no Sheila. What about Madison? Madison likes you a lot.”
Justin scoffed. “Madison? Are you insane? It took me months to get her off of calling me three times a day every day. Bunny boilers need not apply.”
Despite herself, Alex laughed. “You are so wrong. Just because she made it known that she was totally into you did not make her a bunny boiler.”
“It makes her clingy. And I don’t need to confuse matters. You’re the perfect choice. No waters to muddy. You know me better than anyone. You could help me navigate the obstacles of the family. I need you. Not Sheila, or Madison, or some other hired hand. I need my best friend.”
She knew it was an honor. She’d give him anything. He didn’t need to know that. Because she was never going to tell him. “Justin, this is a bad idea.”
“It’s only for a week. Just for the holidays. I’ll make sure you get to LA to do everything that you need to do for the gallery opening. And I’ll give you all the support you need. I just need three or four days. Catalina. And technically you’ll be just as far away from LA as you are now, so it’ll be fine. Please, Alex, I need you.”
And because she was a fool, and because she cared too much about him, Alex sighed. “Okay, fine, I’ll do it.”
“You agreed to do what?”
Alex shifted under the scrutiny of her assistant Cassie’s gaze. “I said that I would pretend to be his girlfriend for a couple of days. It’s no big deal.” Alex busied herself getting the gallery ready, fiddling with Bubble Wrap on the corner of a canvas.
Cassie put her hand on her hips. “Look, I know I’m just the assistant here, but I’d like to think we’re friends, too. After all, we survived working for Peter together. He was a miserable old goat, but he put us together. Now I’m about to way overstep my boundary here.”
Alex shifted on her bare feet. If Justin saw her, he’d roll his eyes. But she preferred to work without the restriction of shoes. It was more comfortable, and something about it made her feel free. “Okay, let’s have it.”
“How long have you been in love with him?”
The heat hit Alex first. Then embarrassment that her deep, dark secret that she’d been holding back from everyone, for years, was plain for someone to see. She and Cassie had known each other since she’d moved to San Diego. At the time, Cassie had worked for the artist Alex apprenticed for. When he’d moved to Europe, Cassie had stayed on to work with Alex.
“I—What—I don’t know what you mean.”
Cassie wrapped the next canvas like a pro. The medium-sized painting, featuring streaks of reds, blues, purples and golds and titled simply Closet, was one of her favorites. The closet was the metaphor for her life and the jumbled mess that it was. And now you’re putting it on display to be judged by everybody.
“Okay, look, I’m totally out of my lane here. But I like you. And I know you’re not one for, like, oversharing or getting real close and whatnot, but I’m worried about you. If you think you can go to Catalina and be a stand-in girlfriend, you’re nuts. I see the way you look at him. I’ve looked at one too many guys like that. Like they walk on water.”
Alex winced. “Is it really that obvious?” she whispered.
Cassie shook her head. “No. No, don’t worry about that. It’s just I spend a lot of time with you. And Justin is always here. So I spend a lot of time with the two of you together. I just see these things. What I know is that with proximity, stuff is harder to hide. So what is your plan? Because I’m not letting my boss lady go to Catalina with a piece of toilet paper stuck to her shoe.”
The metaphor gave Alex a great idea for a painting. Focus on what the girl is asking you.
“Look, I get what you’re saying, but what was I supposed to do? He is my best friend. And he is as close to family as I’ve got.”
“So you can just pretend to be his girlfriend and hope he doesn’t notice that, hey, you’re in love with him?”
“I’m not in love with him. I just—”
“Sometimes you hold on just a second too long when he gives you a hug. When you think he’s not watching, you inhale deeply just to get a contact high from his cologne. Every time he holds your hand and pulls you close, you imagine being with him and what it would be like if he finally one day turned to you and said ‘Let’s do this. Give it a go?’ I’ve been that girl. A lot. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
Her heart thundered against her chest. If Cassie had seen it, she had no hope being locked in on the island with Justin and all his relatives. He’ll find out. And then your friendship will be over.
Alex flushed. “Oh no, this is a disaster. What was I thinking?”
Cassie busied herself. She set another canvas aside, then marked it off her checklist before placing it in its location in the cart. She had a system. When it came to the creative side, that was all Alex, but the organization, the getting pieces to where they needed to be, the customer service, that was all Cassie. She ran everything behind the scenes and Alex would be lost without her.
“I’m not in love with him. We are best friends. And he is like my family. And I wanted to help him out.” Damn, that sounded lame even to her ears. She was so totally screwed. “Oh my God. Would have I done? How do I get out of it?”
“Well, honey, I’m not sure you can get out of it. He said his grandma’s really sick, right? You must’ve had a plan when you said yes.”
“I don’t know. I was sort of gonna do what I’ve always done. You know, pretend it’s not there, bury the feelings deep under years of dirty laundry, where no one should ever go. That was my whole plan. That’s it.”
Cassie shook her head. “I swear, for someone so bright and intuitive, I’m surprised you really don’t want to do anything about your feelings.”
“You don’t understand. I’ve only ever had Justin.” And now Alex could see the problem with that. She’d never really had any close girlfriends. She’d never let anyone get close. Except, Cassie was trying to be a friend right now.
Maybe it was the desperation, maybe it was her spiking blood pressure or the blood roaring to her head that made her think twice. But all she knew was that Cassie was offering some kind of life preserver. And it was nice.
If you get too close, she could hurt you, too. But before Alex could latch onto that thought, Cassie smiled at her. “Look, I’m here if you want to talk about it. I think you and I could be friends. Besides, one of these days, you might need someone more than Justin for advice and stuff.”
Cassie had a point. And for once, Alex liked the idea of having someone else to confide in. Because right about now, she needed all the support she could get.
“I don’t get it. Explain to me why I need to buy new clothes?”
Justin tapped Alex on the nose. She really was adorable. “I think you look awesome. No matter what you wear.” Even now, with her hair up in a messy bun and dressed in a long-sleeved T-shirt and baggy boyfriend jeans, she was cute. Actually stunning, really, bare of any makeup; this was how he liked her. But on closer inspection, there