Winning: From Walk-On to Captain, in Football and Life. Gary Brackett

      When that advice didn’t cover it, she turned to encouraging words: “Anything is possible if you put your mind to it!” or “Attitude determines altitude.”

      Goodness knows she needed reassurance herself at times. Her job must have been enormously draining. To work as a public health nurse with the Camden Board of Social Services, she would have seen the worst of America’s poverty. Her job consisted of helping others through daily existences marred by drugs, despair, and illness. She served crackheads and depressed elderly patients. Her job required a level of composure even as others were stressed or strung out. She brought this trait home; her most reassuring quality was this sense of calm. For those years when my dad was sick, Mom very well could have dipped into despair and anxiety. She did not. Not only did she hold it together, she constantly spoke of her life as a blessing. How frequently in life do those that face great hardship feel the most blessed? She spent countless hours donating her time and money to worthy causes without ever asking anything in return.

      A genuine disciple, she didn’t think about how much time she devoted to such causes. She just thought of things that needed to be done, and then she did them. She had goals in mind for her family and never deviated from those goals. As she soldiered on towards them, Mom never shied away from sacrifice.

      In her honor, I host a dinner every year called the Tender Heart Luncheon. This event honors mothers who have children with a chronic illness. It offers those moms a chance to come together and share, to comfort and encourage. It is the kind of day that I believe my mother deserved every day. To lighten the mood a bit, I always share some of the funny things that my mother taught me, lines I read once in a poem by Bert Christenson called, “Things My Mother Taught Me,”

      My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB

       WELL DONE.

       “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just

       finished cleaning.”

      My mother taught me RELIGION.

       “You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

       My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

       “If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you

       into the middle of next week!”

      My mother taught me LOGIC.

       “Because I said so, that’s why.”

      My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.

       “If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,

       you’re not going to the store with me.”

       My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

       “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’

       in an accident.”

      My mother taught me IRONY.

       “Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry

       about.”

      My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

       “Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

      My mother taught me about WEATHER.

       “This room of yours looks as if a tornado went

       through it.”

      My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.

       “Just wait until we get home.”

      My mother taught me ESP.

       “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when

       you are cold?”

      My mother taught me HUMOR.

       “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t

       come running to me.”

      My mother taught me WISDOM.

       “When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”

      This poem always gets a laugh with the women at the luncheon, even if not all of those lines point straight to my mom. After this lighthearted joking, I talk about the amazement that a son can feel for his mother’s steady commitment. We aren’t always mature enough to realize it or say thanks when we are young, but the best lessons I learned from Mom came simply from her resilient presence. Moms don’t always do the most glamorous jobs in a family. Washing and folding clothes, shuttling kids in carpool, making the meals…these aren’t often the subject of poems or movies about greatness. But the moms at Tender Heart Luncheon, like my mom, are so often the backbone of families during times of turmoil or strife. They are truly great.

      Without Mom, I would not have been sitting on that plane heading down to Miami. Who knows where I would have ended up, if when Dad had to go for treatment, she hadn’t managed to support all of us both emotionally and financially? How she managed to do it all, I’ll never know. But she would be so proud if she were still here. I can hear her now saying in that positive tone, “Attitude determines your altitude.” wel1 l’m sky high, Mommy, sky high!

      “Hey, yo, Gary.” A knock on my arm once again snaps me out of my daydreaming

      “What is that brace on your arm, man? You gonna be able to go for the big game?”

      • • • • •

      “This brace, man? This is nothing. Of course I’m going to play. When you grow up playing against bigger and faster competition, in the streets no less, a little strain doesn’t even cross your mind in a big game like this.”