Chateau de Paix. R. C. Jette
off the grief.” She giggled. “Besides, I’m almost at the level for a nice bonus this year.” She paused as her peripheral vision viewed Joel walking towards the water cooler.
Joel glanced her way, but Margaret pretended she didn’t see him. “Watch. See what I mean,” she whispered to Titus.
Titus glanced towards Joel and saw Carlotta slip a note into his hand. As Joel read the note, they both grinned at each other.
“That’s what I’ve witnessed almost daily for some time now. There’s clearly something going on.” She gestured with her right hand. “Do I go over there and confront them? Do I just give him back his engagement ring? How can I ignore what’s happening before my very eyes?”
“Have you asked him about it?”
“Of course! ” She rubbed the back of her neck with her right hand. “Well, not right out. I just mentioned how beautiful Carlotta was to see his reaction.” She gestured with both hands. “He just said the only beautiful one to him was me.”
“There. I’m sure there’s a good explanation to this water cooler thing.” He gave a wide grin. “I think we need to wait and see what Joel is doing.” He patted her right hand. “Believe me, if there was something, he would’ve mentioned it to me. We’ve had a David and Jonathan relationship since he was about six or so.”
Margaret placed her long black hair behind her ears with both hands. “I’ll heed your counsel and see what’s what.” Her blue eyes widened. “But what if he hasn’t said anything to you because he doesn’t want to be reprimanded?” She gestured with her right hand. “What if he’s waiting for the right moment to break the engagement?”
Titus gave a throaty laugh. “Margaret, Margaret, Margaret! What’s happening to you? I’ve never seen you so insecure. You must trust the Lord and quit leaning on your own understanding.” He paused. “My brother has never done an underhanded thing in his life. It’s not his nature to be deceitful.” He pulled his right eyebrow with his right thumb and forefinger. “I’m not trying to seem controlling, but please pray about taking some time to grieve your mother’s death.” He gazed into her eyes. “You feel like you’re in a dark tunnel, but the light is at the end. Your grief has you seeing only darkness.” He patted her right hand. “You must trust the Lord to take you through to the light.”
“I must admit it does seem quite dark at present. Perhaps, Joel isn’t God’s choice for me. Perhaps, I chose him and not God.”
Titus patted her right hand. “Margaret, Joel prayed this through. The Lord made certain that you are his wife.” He paused. “Now, I may be ten years older than my brother, but God hasn’t pointed out my wife yet. She must be a woman after God’s own heart.” He sat back and laughed. “At first. I thought I was asking a tall order from the Lord. But he calmed me by saying that desire had been put there by him. It’s a preventative so I don’t marry before he brings his foreordained wife into my life.”
Before she could respond, she felt a hand on her right shoulder. “Are you enjoying this beautiful day the Lord has made?” Joel said. “All I know is that I thought I’d never get that job done.” He gave a heavy sigh. “I’m delighted that it’s almost finished. It’s been quite the ordeal.”
She rubbed the back of her neck with her right hand. “What job?” Her blue eyes widened. “I didn’t know you were having trouble with anything.”
Joel scratched the back of his head with his right hand. “It doesn’t seem like anything now.” He clasped his hands together. “Thank God, it’s about complete.” He pulled out a chair and sat next to Margaret. “What book are you reading?”
“The Mysteries of Udolpho.”
Titus gave out a throaty laugh. “Well, I pray you don’t become overwhelmed like Emily in the story.” He patted her right hand. “I’m not sure that’s a story to read after just losing your mother.”
Joel’s eyebrows squished together. “I think my brother might have a point there. That is quite the story with Emily losing her mother, her father, trying to understand her Aunt’s death, and all the mystery about Montoni.”
Margaret giggled. “You two are being ridiculous. I chose this book, because I just wanted to get into some gothic place away from everything.” She gestured with her right hand. “One of the nurses who tended to my mother told me how she couldn’t put it down. It was as though Emily was in paradise. After her mother dies, she and her father go on a journey. After his death, she finds herself in a nightmare of the horrors of Udolpho.” She gave a sigh. “It seemed like the perfect book explaining what I’ve been feeling.”
Joel took her right hand and held it between both his hands. “Margaret, only the Lord can give comfort during this time. You’ve missed church for several weeks.” His brown eyes gazed at her. “Your mother never missed church. I do wish you would seriously take time to grieve before the grief consumes you.”
Margaret threw up both hands. “What it is with you two? I’m fine. I told you I missed church because I couldn’t sit there without my mother. I’m healing in my way.” She paused. “Just give me a little more time.”
Joel kissed her forehead. “I’ve been praying for you. I know you’ll come through. The Lord promises that when we love him, all things we go through will work together for our good.” He scratched the back of his head with his right hand. “We may not see any good in it, but faith says God will bring about something good. He is faithful to his word.”
Titus gave a wide grin. “I do believe Joel is correct. For I have a strong feeling that something good is going to come out of this grief.” He touched her right hand. “I don’t mean that it’s good that your mother died, but God has a way of making something good come out of our trials. There is light at the end of the tunnel.” He paused and looked into her eyes. “We have to trust in his love for us.” He paused. “You must get your eyes off your grief and onto him. Remember, that’s how Peter sunk. He walked on the water while keeping his eyes on Jesus, but sunk when he looked away at the storm.”
Margaret fought back tears. “That’s what my mother told me.”
Chapter Two
Storms Rage Within and Without
A turbulent sensibility raced through Margaret as she peered out her living room window. Her emotions smoldered like an active volcano ready to spew out molting lava as she watched Hurricane Vastare rampage outside. Winds chanted the ritual of destruction, leaves whirled like musical tops spun out of control. Near the garden, the old elm tree, forced to genuflect before the power of the storm appeared to supplicate for its safety.
As she witnessed the tree arch humbler and humbler, fear took control of her emotions. Suddenly her being mingled with the tree, and she became one with it in the struggle to survive. Margaret felt them both being plucked up by the giant tendrils of some unknown force of destruction.
She grabbed her head with both hands, closed her eyes, and tried to focus on reality. Sensing a need to recover her reasoning, she opened her eyes to gaze at the tree. With its limbs stretched towards heaven, it seemed to laugh as it danced to the song of the wind.
Margaret opened her briefcase and searched frantically for the vacation pamphlet. The daily grief had her strung out like a coil ready to snap. She sat down in the bow back Windsor arm chair that was her mother’s. “God! Why didn’t you heal her? Your word says, that faith the size of mustard seed can remove mountains. I know I believed.” She grit her teeth together. “You took my father before I even knew him. You took my mother, and now you are taking Joel. You take everyone I love.”
The tears streamed down her face. “Now, I have to watch Joel and Carlotta at the water cooler.” At the thought of seeing them caused a spasmodic trembling within. “What do they think I am? I must appear like a fool. As if I don’t see them passing notes back and forth.”