Murder in the Middle Pasture. John R. Erickson
pickup hasn’t been cleared.”
“But Hank . . . do we have to run in the snow?”
I gave him a withering glare. “Unless you can fly, son, you’ll have to run in the snow. Come on.”
With a look of agony stamped on his face, Drover ventured one foot into the snow. I streaked past him and headed up the hill to check the tires on that unidentified pickup.
Turned out to be Slim’s rig so there was no real emergency, but just to be on the safe side, I restamped his right front tire. There’s no sense in taking chances.
High Loper and Sally May came out the back door. Loper had two suitcases in each hand and a playpen under his arm. Sally May carried the baby and several packages wrapped in colorful paper and tied with ribbons.
I sat down beside the gate and hung around to see what was going on. Drover had made it up the hill by that time. He stood shivering in the snow with his feet together.
Loper appeared to be in a foul mood and Slim started joshing him. “Gosh, Loper, I sure wish I was going someplace for Christmas. You sure y’all got enough stuff. You forgot the dinner table and the commode.”
Sally May gave him the evil eye. “Slim, this isn’t the time for your brand of humor. When you get married and have kids, you’ll understand about traveling.”
“Yes ma’am.”
When Sally May wasn’t looking, Loper shook his head at Slim and his mouth formed the words, “No you won’t.”
Slim shoved his hands into his jeans pockets and grinned at Loper. “Reckon that stuff’ll fit into the car or do you want me to hook up the stock trailer?”
Loper muttered under his breath, something about “your Sunday britches.” I studied Slim’s jeans. They looked normal to me—kind of worn and dirty, actually, and I sure wouldn’t have described them as church clothes. But cowboys are a strange breed. They don’t always think like the rest of the world.
I was waiting beside the gate when Sally May came out. I wagged my tail and gave her a big cowdog smile. She looked down at me with narrowed eyes and said, “Get away, you nasty thing!”
What . . . ? How . . . ? Hey, I didn’t jump up on her, I didn’t lick her in the face, I didn’t lick her on the leg. I didn’t do anything but smile at her!
All right, maybe she was still sore at me for jumping up on the dinner table and eating those T-bone steaks, or for running into the utility room after I’d been sprayed by a skunk, but heck, that had been months ago.
I was perfectly willing to start over with a clean slate and try to make something of the friendship, but Sally May had always been bad about carrying a grudge. Over little things too.
So she walked past me with her nose in the air, and then you know what she did? On her way to the car she saw Mister Pitiful, Mister Half-Stepper, Mister Sleep-Till-Noon—meaning Drover, of course—and instead of saying “Get away you nasty thing,” she bent down and rubbed his neck.
“Poor puppy’s cold.” She straightened up. “Oh Slim, why don’t you let Drover sleep in the utility room while we’re gone. Poor little thing doesn’t have a warm coat like,” she looked at me and her lip curled up, “like Hank McNasty.”
I wagged my tail.
“Hank can stay out with the skunks and the sewer, but Drover needs a warm bed.”
Let me intrude here to make one small point. Drover had very little promise as a cowdog, but even if he’d had papers and instincts and the rest of the program, that kind of mollycoddling would have ruined him.
The worst thing you can do to a ranch dog is spoil him. Let him stay inside in the winter and you’ve ruined him. For the rest of his life, he’ll expect a warm bed.
Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but I still believe that a cowdog ought to be just a little tougher than your ordinary breeds, and you’ll never catch me sleeping in a warm house, no matter how cold it gets outside.
So there you are, a little insight into the price we pay for being special, and also a little insight into why Drover would never go far in the business.
In addition to being dumb and chickenhearted, he had a weakness for comfort.
Sally May opened the back door of the car. Then she opened the front door too and put the baby into the baby seat. I watched from the gate.
Why had she opened both the doors? Why had she left the back door open? Was she trying to tell me something? Was it possible that . . . ?
I studied on that. It finally dawned on me that she was giving me an opportunity to go on the trip with them. What else could it mean?
Women are pretty subtle. They don’t always come out and tell you what’s on their minds. Often they will say one thing and then turn around and do another. A guy has to stay alert and interpret the signs.
Why did she want me to go with them on the trip? Maybe by the time she reached the car, she’d thought things over and decided she wanted extra protection for the baby. That made sense. I mean, it’s common knowledge that in spite of our gruff exterior, we cowdogs are very protective of children.
Well, I can tell you that I had other things to do. I had about two weeks’ work lined up and going off on a trip really didn’t fit into my program. But a guy can’t ignore the call of duty.
If Sally May wanted me to go, by George I had to go. So I hopped into the car and sat down in the backseat.
Her eyes came up and stabbed me. Her nostrils flared. “Get your dirty paws out of my car! Scat, shoo! Loper, come get your dog out of the backseat!”
Huh?
Loper appeared at the door. “Dang it, Hank, get out of the car.”
Now wait a minute . . .
“Come on, boy, out. Don’t we have enough trouble getting away on a trip without you?”
I whapped my tail on the seat and looked from one face to the other. I didn’t know what to do.
“He’s getting mud all over the seat!”
“Hank, for crying out loud! Come on, get out.”
Loper reached in, grabbed me by the scruff of the neck, and pitched me into the snow. He aimed a boot at my tail end, but I got out of the way, just in time.
I don’t know how you please these people. One minute they want you to . . . never mind.
At last they got the baby and the luggage loaded. Slim came out to say good-bye. “Y’all have a good time, and don’t worry about the ranch. Me and Hank’ll take care of everything.”
Loper laughed and shook his head. I didn’t see anything funny about that.
“Keep an eye on those heavy heifers. They’ll start calving any day now. And try to keep the house halfway nice. We don’t want to come home to a wreck.”
“You just have a good Christmas and don’t worry about a thing,” said Slim.
They shook hands and Loper climbed into the car. As he was backing out the driveway, Loper looked at me and shook his head. I wagged my tail and barked the car all the way up to the county road.
The car tires rumbled over the cattle guard and they were gone. I trotted back down to the house. Big soft flakes of snow were falling from the . . . well, from the sky, of course. I was ready to knock off and get some sleep, but on my way down to the gas tanks I heard a terrible racket up at the machine shed.
It sounded like a dogfight. One of the dogs involved was Drover, and unless my ears deceived me, he was coming out on the short end of the tussle.
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