60 Plays: The George Bernard Shaw Edition (Illustrated). GEORGE BERNARD SHAW
of their duty; and he is now a standing menace to the peace and order of the town.
MONTANELLI. Whatever the man has done he has the right to be judged according to law.
FERRARI. The ordinary course of law involves delay, your Eminence; and in this case every moment is precious. There’s a remarkable amount of devilry — I beg pardon; but really this man is enough to try the patience of a saint. It’s hardly credible; but I have to conduct all the interrogations myself; for the regular officer cannot stand it any longer.
MONTANELLI. How is that?
FERRARI. It’s difficult to explain, your Eminence, but you would understand if you had once heard the way he goes on. One might think the interrogating officer were the criminal and he the judge. If your Eminence would only be present at one of the interrogations, I am sure you would agree with me. He needn’t know anything about it. You might overhear him from —
MONTANELLI [interrupting haughtily] lam a minister of religion, Colonel Ferrari, not a police-spy; and eavesdropping forms no part of my professional duties.
FERRARI. I — I didn’t mean to give offence —
MONTANELLI. I think we shall not get any good out of discussing this question further. Bring the prisoner in. I will have a talk with him.
FERRARI. I venture very respectfully to advise your Eminence not to attempt it. The man is perfectly incorrigible. It would be both safer and wiser to overstep the letter of the law for this once, and get rid of him before he does any more mischief. It is with great diffidence that I venture to press the point after what your Eminence has said; but after all I am responsible to Monsignor the Legate for the order of the town —
MONTANELLI. And I am responsible to God and His Holiness that there shall be no underhand dealing in my diocese. Since you press me in the matter, Colonel, I take my stand upon my privilege as Cardinal. I will not allow a secret CourtMartial in this town in peace-time.
FERRARI [resentfully] As your Eminence pleases, [to the Sergeant] Bring the prisoner in. [He sits down].
MONTANELLI. Colonel Ferrari, I propose to see the prisoner alone.
FERRARI [rising stiffly] You do not wish me to be present?
MONTANELLI. I do not wish anybody to be present.
FERRARI. What! No guards!
MONTANELLI. Certainly not.
FERRARI. Then, with your Eminence’s permission, I shall clear out. And I warn you that I take no responsibility for the risk you are going to run.
MONTANELLI. I do not ask you to do so. You will find there is no risk.
FERRARI. Oho! You think so. [lowering his voice] Listen to me, your Eminence. I have been obliged to be rather strict with him — especially as it is a military prison. The other day I thought that perhaps a little indulgence might have a good effect. I offered to relax the discipline considerably if he would behave in a reasonable manner; and how does your Eminence suppose he answered me? He lay looking at me a minute, like a wolf in a cage, and then said quite softly: “Colonel, I can’t get up and strangle you, but my teeth are pretty good: you had better take your throat a little further off.” He is as savage as a wild cat.
MONTANELLI. I am not surprised to hear it. I will give you my answer as to the CourtMartial when I have seen the prisoner.
FERRARI. I have no doubt, your Eminence, he will convince you of the necessity of getting rid of him better than I can.
As he goes to the door, it opens, and the Gadfly enters, escorted by the Sergeant and four soldiers. The Gadfly instantly makes a spring at Ferrari. The soldiers drag him off. The Cardinal rises, white and shocked.
Ferrari. Now, your Eminence, I hope you believe me. You have seen for yourself.
GADFLY [coolly] I am bitterly disappointed, your Eminence. I was within an inch of getting a good bite when these foolish fellows stopped me.
FERRARI. I leave him in your Eminence’s hands. I wish your Eminence a pleasant interview. Exit.
MONTANELLI [to the guards] I wish to be alone with the prisoner. You can wait downstairs.
SERGEANT. But, your Eminence — montanelli [peremptorily] You are to wait downstairs, all of you. Go.
The Sergeant, overawed, takes his men out.
[to Gadfly] Sit down, please.
The Gadfly sits.
Signor Rivarez, I wish to ask you a few questions, and shall be very much obliged to you if you will answer them.
GADFLY. My chief occupation at present is to be asked questions.
MONTANELLI. And — not to answer them? So I have heard, but those questions are put by officials who are investigating your case and whose duty is to use your answers as evidence.
GADFLY [with covert insolence] And those of your Eminence?
MONTANELLI [quietly] Mine, whether you answer them or not, will remain between you and me. If they should trench upon your political secrets, of course you will not answer. Otherwise, though we are complete strangers to each other, I hope that you will answer frankly, as a personal favour to me.
GADFLY [icily] I am entirely at your Eminence’s service.
MONTANELLI. First, then, you are said to have been smuggling firearms into this district. What are they wanted for?
GADFLY. To kill rats with.
MONTANELLI. That is a terrible answer. Are all your fellow men rats in your eyes if they cannot think as you do?
GADFLY. Some of them.
MONTANELLI [suddenly, after a pause] What is that on your hand?
GADFLY [glancing at his left hand] Old marks from the teeth of some of the rats.
MONTANELLI. Excuse me: I was speaking of the other hand. That is a fresh hurt.
GADFLY [holding up his right hand with the wrist badly cut and bruised] It is a mere trifle, as you see. When I was arrested the other day, thanks to your Eminence [he makes a little bow], one of the soldiers stamped on it.
MONTANELLI [taking the hand and examining it] How does it come to be in such a state now, after three weeks? It is all inflamed.
GADFLY. Possibly the pressure of the iron has not done it much good.
MONTANELLI [frowning] Have they been putting irons on a fresh wound?
GADFLY. Naturally, your Eminence; that’s what fresh wounds are for. Old wounds are not much use. They will only ache: you can’t make them burn properly.
MONTANELLI [looks at him closely, then rises and opens a drawer full of surgical appliances] Give me the hand. [He bathes the injured place and bandages it carefully] I will speak about the irons. Now I want to ask you another question. What do you propose to do?
GADFLY. That is very simply answered, your Eminence. To escape if I can; and if I can’t, to die.
MONTANELLI. Why “to die”?
GADFLY. Because if the Governor doesn’t succeed in getting me shot, I shall be sent to the galleys; and for me that comes to the same thing. I haven’t got the health to live through it.
MONTANELLI [after a pause] Suppose you succeed in escaping, what will you do with your life?
GADFLY. I have already told your Eminence; I shall kill rats.
MONTANELLI. That is to say, that if I let you escape from here now — supposing I had the power to do so — you would use your freedom to foster violence and bloodshed instead of preventing them?
GADFLY [raising his eyes to the crucifix on the wall]
“Not peace but a sword” — at least I should be in good company. For my own part, though, I prefer pistols.
MONTANELLI