Backblock Ballads and Later Verses. Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
changin'
In the face of sudden danger or some great emergency;
Heard the like in song and story and in bush traditions hoary,
But I nearly dropped me bundle as I looked at Dad McGee.
While we gazed he seemed to toughen; as his fingers gripped the handle
His old form grew straight and supple, and a light leapt in his eye;
And he stepped around the waggon, not with footsteps weak and laggin',
But with firm, determined bearin', as he flung the whip on high.
Now he swung the leaders over, while the whip-lash snarled and volleyed;
And they answered like one bullock, strainin' to each crack and clout;
But he kept his cursin' under till old Brindle made a blunder;
Then I thought all Hell had hit me, and the master opened out. And the language! Oh, the language! Seemed to me I must be dreamin'; While the wondrous words and phrases only genius could produce Roared and rumbled, fast and faster, in the throat of that Old Master— Oaths and curses tipped with lightning, cracklin' flames of fierce abuse.
Then we knew the man before us was a Master of our callin';
One of those great lords of language gone for ever from Out-back;
Heroes of an ancient order; men who punched across the border;
Vanished giants of the sixties; puncher-princes of the track.
Now we heard the timbers straining heard the waggon's loud complainin',
And the master cried triumphant, as he swung 'em into line,
As they put their shoulders to it, lifted her, and pulled her through it:
"That's the way we useter do it in the days o' sixty-nine!"
Near the foot of Mount St. Leonard lives an old, enfeebled party
Who retired from bullock-punchin' at the age of eighty-three.
If you seek him folk will mention, merely, that he draws the pension;
But to us he looms a Master—Prince of Punchers, Dad McGee!
"Paw"
Haw!
Ai've just obteened a pension for mai Paw.
And you should hev seen the people thet were theah. Re-ally, it was surpraising! Maind, Ai am not criticaising, But it was embarrassing, Ai do decleah. Ai met the Snobson-Smythes and Toady-Browns, and many moah Belonging to ouah set; and wondahed what they came theah foah. And, of course, Ai didn't say a word of Paw. Ai rather think they've nevah heard of Paw. But Ai thought it well to mention That Ai came to get the pension For an agéd person who had worked for Maw. The Snobson-Smythes said, "Fancy! That is just why we came dahn." But Ai've heard they hev a mothah hidden somewheah out of tahn.
Haw!
Ai do deserve some gratitude from Paw. To think what Ai've gone thro' foah him to-day! Mixing with the lowah classes And Ai never saw such masses Of disreputable creatuahs, Ai must say. Impostors, Ai've no doubt, if most of them were but unmasked. And then, the most humiliating questions Ai was asked! Yes, he forced me to admit it was foah Paw. Asked me, brutally, if it was foah mai Paw. Some low-bred official fellow, Who conversed in quaite a bellow, And he patronised me laike a high Bashaw. And his questions, rudely personal, Ai hardly could enduah. The Government should teach its people mannahs, Ai am suah! Haw! Ai'm glad we've got the pension foah pooah Paw. His maintenance has been—O, such a strain. Ouah establishment's extensive And exceedingly expensive, As mai husband has remawked taime and again. It's quaite a miracle how Ai contrive to dress at all. He cut me dahn to twenty guineas for last Mayoral Ball!
And it's such a boah to hev to think of Paw— To hev a secret skeleton laike Paw. Paw, you know, was once a diggah, And he cuts no social figgah. And his mannahs! O, they touch us on the raw. Of course, we're very fond of him, and all thet sort of thing; But we couldn't hev him—could we?—when theah's naice folk visiting. Haw! It's cost us pawnds and pawnds to care foah Paw. And then, it is so hard to keep him dawk. Why, no later than last Mond'y, Ai was out with Lady Grundy, When we ran raight into him outsaide the Pawk. Goodness knows! Ai managed, somehow, to elude him with a nod, And Ai said he was a tradesman; but she must hev thought it odd. You can't picture the ubiquity of Paw, And he's really very obstinate, is Paw. Why, he held to the contention That this most convenient pension Was a thing he hadn't any raight to draw! He said we'd kept him eighteen months, and ought to keep him yet. But mai husband soon convinced him thet he couldn't count on thet.
Haw!
He was a pioneah, you know, mai Paw.
But of mai early laife Ai never tell.
Paw worked, as Ai hev stated; And he had us educated; And, later on, Ai married rather well. And then, you know, deah Paw became—er—well, embarrassing. For he is so unconventional and—all thet sort of thing. But the Government has taken ovah Paw. We are happy now we've aisolated Paw. And a bettah era's dawning, For mai husband said this mawning Thet the money saved would buy a motah-caw. Paw was so good to us when we were young, that, you'll allow, It's really taime the Government did something foah him now.
The Builders
Behold, I built a fowlhouse in my yard!
Two months ago the great work was begun,
And every eventide I laboured hard,
What time my daily office grind was done.
'Tis to my industry a monument.
The fowls, my wife, and I are well content.
Indeed, I built a fowlhouse. God forbid—
Although I made it, floor and roof and wall—
That I should boast about this thing I did.
I mention it most modestly withal.
Just these two hands, this brain were all I had.
I built it on my own, and I am glad.
And, as I toiled at eve, my wife would come,
The candle, nails and divers tools to hold;
And when I swore because I hit my thumb
She did not hang the contract up to scold,
Nor move a vote of censure, and maintain
The thing should be pulled down and built again.
She is my helpmate, both in name and deed;
Nor does she deem it policy to nag.
And when she saw my wounded finger bleed
She bound it up, most tenderly, with rag.
Thus, for one end, did both of us conspire—