The Surprising Adventures of Baron Munchausen. Rudolf Raspe
I hardly knew what to make of it. Coming up to them, I was greatly
surprised. The hare had littered in running; the same had happened to
my bitch in coursing, and there were just as many leverets as pups. By
instinct the former ran, the latter coursed: and thus I found myself
in possession at once of six hares, and as many dogs, at the end of a
course which had only begun with one.
I remember this, my wonderful bitch, with the same pleasure and
tenderness as a superb Lithuanian horse, which no money could have
bought. He became mine by an accident, which gave me an opportunity
of showing my horsemanship to a great advantage. I was at Count
Przobossky’s noble country-seat in Lithuania, and remained with the
ladies at tea in the drawing-room, while the gentlemen were down in
the yard, to see a young horse of blood which had just arrived from the
stud. We suddenly heard a noise of distress; I hastened down-stairs, and
found the horse so unruly, that nobody durst approach or mount him.
The most resolute horsemen stood dismayed and aghast; despondency was
expressed in every countenance, when, in one leap, I was on his back,
took him by surprise, and worked him quite into gentleness and obedience
with the best display of horsemanship I was master of. Fully to show
this to the ladies, and save them unnecessary trouble, I forced him to
leap in at one of the open windows of the tea-room, walked round several
times, pace, trot, and gallop, and at last made him mount the tea-table,
there to repeat his lessons in a pretty style of miniature which was
exceedingly pleasing to the ladies, for he performed them amazingly
well, and did not break either cup or saucer. It placed me so high in
their opinion, and so well in that of the noble lord, that, with his
usual politeness, he begged I would accept of this young horse, and
ride him full career to conquest and honour in the campaign against the
Turks, which was soon to be opened, under the command of Count Munich.
I could not indeed have received a more agreeable present, nor a
more ominous one at the opening of that campaign, in which I made my
apprenticeship as a soldier. A horse so gentle, so spirited, and so
fierce – at once a lamb and a Bucephalus, put me always in mind of the
soldier’s and the gentleman’s duty! of young Alexander, and of the
astonishing things he performed in the field.
We took the field, among several other reasons, it seems, with an
intention to retrieve the character of the Russian arms, which had been
blemished a little by Czar Peter’s last campaign on the Pruth; and this
we fully accomplished by several very fatiguing and glorious campaigns
under the command of that great general I mentioned before.
Modesty forbids individuals to arrogate to themselves great successes
or victories, the glory of which is generally engrossed by the
commander – nay, which is rather awkward, by kings and queens who never
smelt gunpowder but at the field-days and reviews of their troops; never
saw a field of battle, or an enemy in battle array.
Nor do I claim any particular share of glory in the great engagements
with the enemy. We all did our duty, which, in the patriot’s, soldier’s,
and gentleman’s language, is a very comprehensive word, of great honour,
meaning, and import, and of which the generality of idle quidnuncs
and coffee-house politicians can hardly form any but a very mean and
contemptible idea. However, having had the command of a body of hussars,
I went upon several expeditions, with discretionary powers; and the
success I then met with is, I think, fairly and only to be placed to my
account, and to that of the brave fellows whom I led on to conquest and
to victory. We had very hot work once in the van of the army, when we
drove the Turks into Oczakow. My spirited Lithuanian had almost brought
me into a scrape: I had an advanced fore-post, and saw the enemy coming
against me in a cloud of dust, which left me rather uncertain about
their actual numbers and real intentions: to wrap myself up in a
similar cloud was common prudence, but would not have much advanced my
knowledge, or answered the end for which I had been sent out; therefore
I let my flankers on both wings spread to the right and left and make
what dust they could, and I myself led on straight upon the enemy, to
have nearer sight of them: in this I was gratified, for they stood and
fought, till, for fear of my flankers, they began to move off rather
disorderly. This was the moment to fall upon them with spirit; we broke
them entirely – made a terrible havoc amongst them, and drove them not
only back to a walled town in their rear, but even through it, contrary
to our most sanguine expectation.
The swiftness of my Lithuanian enabled me to be foremost in the pursuit;
and seeing the enemy fairly flying through the opposite gate, I thought
it would be prudent to stop in the market-place, to order the men to
rendezvous. I stopped, gentlemen; but judge of my astonishment when
in this market-place I saw not one of my hussars about me! Are they
scouring the other streets? or what is become of them? They could not
be far off, and must, at all events, soon join me. In that expectation
I walked my panting Lithuanian to a spring in this market-place, and let
him drink. He drank uncommonly, with an eagerness not to be satisfied,
but natural enough; for when I looked round for my men, what should I
see, gentlemen! the hind part of the poor creature – croup and legs were
missing, as if he had been cut in two, and the water ran out as it came
in, without refreshing or doing him any good! How it could have happened
was quite a mystery to me, till I returned with him to the town-gate.
There I saw, that when I rushed in pell-mell with the flying enemy, they
had dropped the portcullis (a heavy falling door, with sharp spikes at
the