Food Men Love. Margie Lapanja
over medium-high heat (the pan is hot and “ready” when a drop of water sizzles in it). Pour in egg mixture. (Mixture should set immediately at edges.)
With an inverted Teflon™ pancake turner, carefully push the cooked portions at the edges of the omelet toward the center so the uncooked portions can “spill over” and reach the hot surface of the pan. Tilt pan to spread the uncooked portions of the egg mixture as necessary.
When the top of the omelet is thickened and no visible liquid egg remains, fill it with your filling of choice, if any (for suggestions, see The Inside Line on next page). With the pancake turner, fold omelet in half. Let the omelet cook in the pan for 30 seconds to a minute more. Invert it onto a plate with a quick flip of the wrist or take the mellow route and simply slide it onto a plate. Makes 1 incredible omelet.
THE INSIDE LINE
Omelets cook so quickly that the filling should be selected and prepared before starting the eggs. My friend Michael Shapiro, a.k.a. Doc Omelet, suggests trying a “whatever's in the fridge” omelet or one of the international or custom combos below:
The Greek: Olives, feta cheese, spinach, and onions
The Mexican: Salsa, onions, chiles, avocado, sausage or bacon
The Jewish: Kosher salami, cheddar cheese, and onions
The Italian: Italian sausage, pepperoni, mozzarella cheese, and onions
The Garbage: Anything…broccoli, onions, sprouts, carrots
The Duke: Caviar
EGGHEAD EGGSCHANGE
What came first? Scrambled eggs or coddled eggs? Sunny-side up or eggs over easy? Huevos rancheros or a Denver omelet? Do you ever feel the urge for a “man on an island” (egg cooked in carved out toast) or crave an “Adam and Eve on a raft” (two eggs on toast)? Have you tried a Scotch woodcock—eggs served on toast with anchovies?
That little egg, the primal source of life, has cracked the code of our cuisine and our vocabulary. You've been taught to never put all of your “eggs in one basket” for fear of “laying a big egg” in public. If you have a friend who's an “eggshell blonde” (bald), you could “egg him on” to buy an “egg-boiler” (a bowler hat). But if he is a “good egg,” he'll just dismiss you as an “egghead” (intellectual) and go enjoy his egg rolls and egg cream soda (even if there are no eggs in either of them…).
In the Style of a Real Man
The French often baptize culinary creations with the preface à la— which literally means “of the” or more specifically “in the style of”—followed by the person, foods, or conditions that inspired the dish. Though today many men wear the chef's hat in the family, the following list makes it obvious who was in the kitchen working on the recipes when these phrases first came on the scene.
| à la boulangère | In the style of the baker's wife; served with fried onions and potatoes |
| à la fermière | In the farmer's wife's style; usually a roast served with celery, carrots, turnips, and onions |
| à la financière | In the style of the banker's wife; garnished with olives, mushrooms, and cucumbers with a truffle sauce and creamed goose liver soup |
| à la maréchale | In the style of the marshal's wife; scallops or chicken breasts dipped in egg and bread crumbs and fried in butter |
| à l'ambassadrice | In the ambassador's wife's style; special sauce made with Madeira wine and veal gravy |
In this new culinary Renaissance age of men in the kitchen, I add:
| au vrai homme | In the style of a real man |
As food historian Andrew F. Smith explained, “Real men do eat quiche, but it's usually only with a real woman.”
Quiche des Vrais Hommes
(Real Men's Quiche)
1 prebaked 9-inch pie shell (see page 208 for the recipe)
Quiche Filling
2 to 3 slices of premium bacon
1 tablespoon olive oil
2 teaspoons brown sugar
6 ounces fresh salmon, cut into small chunks
4 to 5 artichoke hearts, chopped
4 to 5 mushrooms, sliced
2 tablespoons sweet red onion, finely chopped
1 clove garlic, finely chopped
1 medium tomato, seeded and diced
1 tablespoon white wine or apple juice
½ teaspoon herbes de Provence
¼ teaspoon paprika
5 large eggs (fresh and organic is the key!)
1 cup half-and-half
⅛ teaspoon salt
Dash of white pepper
4 to 5 drops Tabasco™, to your liking
1 cup Swiss or Monterey Jack cheese, grated
Paprika garnish
Bake the pie crust for 7 to 9 minutes at 400°F (see The Inside Line on prebaking a crust, page 206).
In the meanwhile, prepare the filling. In a medium pan, fry bacon until crisp. Drain the grease from the pan and pat bacon with a paper towel to remove excess oil. Crumble the bacon and set aside.
In a large skillet, heat olive oil and brown sugar over medium heat, then sauté the salmon, chopped artichoke hearts, mushrooms, onion, and garlic for 2 to 3 minutes. Add the tomato, white wine or juice, herbes de Provence, and paprika and sauté for a few more minutes until the flavors meld. Remove from heat and set aside.
Reset the oven temperature to 325°F. In an ample bowl, whisk together eggs, half-and-half, salt, pepper, and Tabasco. Spread the salmon-artichoke mixture over the prepared pie crust. Sprinkle with bacon pieces and cheese and pour the egg mixture over everything. Garnish with a few shakes of paprika.
Bake in the lower half of the oven for 40 to 45 minutes, until egg mixture is set. (Cover edges of pie with foil if they begin to darken.) Let cool 15 minutes before serving. Makes 6 real servings for 6 real men.
Here's to me, and here's to you,And here's to love and laughter.I'll be true as long as you,And not one moment after.
—Irish breakfast toast
Warming Up His Appetite
What love is to the heart, appetite is to the stomach. The stomach is the conductor that leads and livens up the great orchestra of our emotions
—Gioacchino Rossini, Composer
Scrumptious Soups, Salads, and Grand Sandwiches
HE LOVES…
