Walk With Me, Jesus: A Widow's Journey. Ronda Chervin Ph.D.
it will be realized.... God will in his own time discover his intentions, nor will I allow one word of entreaty from my pen - His...blessed Will be done.'
St. Elizabeth Seton
In correspondence dated 1808.
In 1774 the first American-born saint was born to a prominent Episcopalian family of New York City. Elizabeth was only three years old when her mother died; she became much attached to her doctor father, Richard, and often accompanied him to Ellis Island, where he helped the sickly poor immigrants who had just arrived in the "Promised Land."
Elizabeth was unusually devout and loved to pray, living from Sunday to Sunday for her spiritual enrichment. Yet the young woman was subject to despairing, even suicidal, moods over the evils of the world and her own miseries.
Elizabeth married a charming young businessman, William Seton, and they had five children. Her happy family life was marred when her husband's business began to fail, leaving the family nearly bankrupt. This anxiety was compounded when her spouse contracted tuberculosis. Hoping to save the life of her beloved husband, Elizabeth decided to take a trip with him and their eldest daughter to Leghorn (or Livorno), Italy, which was supposed to be a better locale for a person with his health problems. Unfortunately, William's health worsened on the long journey. He was quarantined in an Italian lazaretto, and died about six weeks later.
This tragic loss was to become a source of blessing; the family of Antonio Filicchi, her husband's Italian business associate and a devout Catholic, helped Elizabeth and her daughter during this bleak time.
The faith of her hosts had a profound impact on Elizabeth. When she returned to New York, Elizabeth was torn between the church of her family and the Church she was becoming convinced had the greater claim to truth. Her family made it clear where her allegiance should be; they told her that if Elizabeth became a Roman Catholic, she would lose all the support from her Episcopalian relatives - support she needed as a poor widow. Nevertheless, the widow converted, trusting God for her physical needs.
As a Catholic, the previously wealthy widow found herself in comparative poverty. She embraced the opportunity to live simply, and to do the housework that a woman of her background would have had servants to perform. She was happy to be free of social obligations she had never really liked in the first place. Yet her life was also touched by sorrow again and again; she lost both her daughters as well as another relative who had converted to the Catholic faith because of her influence. These sufferings made Elizabeth's heart full of empathy. Consider the tone of a letter written to Cecilia, her convert relative who later joined her in the order, who was suffering persecution at the hands of the New York City family members:
"Yes, my Cecilia favored of Heaven, Associate of Angels, beloved Child of Jesus - You shall have the Victory, and He the Glory. To him be Glory forever who has called you to so glorious a combat, and so tenderly supports you through it. You will triumph, for it is Jesus who fights - not you my dear one - Oh so young and timid, weak, and irresolute, the Lamb could not stem a torrent, nor stand the beating storm - but the tender Shepherd takes it on his shoulder, casts his cloak about it, and the happy trembler finds itself at home before it knew its journey was half finished - and so my dear one it will be with you, He will not leave you one moment, nor suffer the least harm to approach you, not one tear shall fall to the ground nor one sigh of love be lost - happy, happy child - and if you are not removed to the sheltering fold that awaits you [in Elizabeth's home-convent-to-be] he will make you one in his own bosom until your task is done...how must [the saints] rejoice over you while walking so steadfastly in their paths, and their sufferings.
"From now on a household of five will be divided, three against two and two against three; a father will be divided against his son and a son against his father, a mother against her daughter and a daughter against her mother, a mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law"
(Luke 12:50-53).
St. Elizabeth experienced the truth of this passage many times in her own-life. Have you?
If so, how have religious divisions and conflicts affected you and your family in the grieving process?
If not, how has your faith sustained you and your family members?
When burdens threaten to crush me, when isolation overwhelms, You, oh Lord, have not abandoned me. Jesus, I trust in You.
ST. ELIZABETH SETON: A WORK OF CHARITY
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
on your own understanding rely not;
In all your ways be mindful of him,
and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Although Elizabeth loved the sacramental and devotional life of the Roman Catholic Church, she was surprised that there was so little educational opportunity for children. She dreamed of starting her own little school for the poor. Eventually the widow's hopes were met with a similar idea on the part of the highly educated Bishop John Carroll of Baltimore. He invited her to start a teaching order for girls called The Sisters of Charity of Saint Joseph.
Elizabeth insisted that the bishop arrange things so her sons could be provided for at a flourishing Catholic school for boys, and her daughters could stay with her. The curriculum of the first school run by the newly formed order included reading, writing, arithmetic, English, French, and needlework. Quite a number of the students were boarders, so Elizabeth was busy from five-thirty in the morning until nine at night.
By no means was the way smooth for the new congregation of sisters. By 1809 Mother Seton was writing to Bishop Carroll of the difficulties. A cleric had ordered them to give up the direction of a priest who was greatly beloved for his understanding and inspiration. Instead they were to be ordered about by a superior they thought did not enter into the spirit of their own plans. Saint Elizabeth was willing to accept for herself the cross of the many misunderstandings that took place at the beginning of the foundation, but was not ready to see her sisters suffer.
For a while, another sister was appointed to head the order, which was followed by much turmoil. Elizabeth was especially anxious to retain charge over her own children under the new circumstances. Finally, the sister appointed as the congregation's head left, and the spirituality of the sisters grew in peace and joy."
Observe the sweet ironic humor of this account of the community Elizabeth wrote to her dear spiritual friend Antonio Filicchi, who helped the order financially as well as by his prayers:
"Now then you will laugh when I tell you that your wicked little Sister is placed at the head of a Community of Saints, ten of the most pious Souls you could wish, considering that some of them are young and all under thirty. Six more postulants are daily waiting till we move in a larger place to receive them, and we might be a very large family if I received half who desire to come, but your Reverend Mother is obliged to be very cautious for fear we should not have the means of earning our living during the Winter. Yet as Sisters of Charity we should fear nothing...."