Heart Of Courage. Sue MacKay

Heart Of Courage - Sue MacKay


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she persisted.

      ‘Auckland.’

      So he wasn’t just visiting, he was stopping. Guess she should be glad they’d be in the same city. Shouldn’t she? That depended on lots of things. ‘That’s where you come from?’ When he nodded abruptly she commented, ‘You’re not happy with my questions.’ It was like pulling teeth.

      ‘Not particularly.’

      Fair enough. ‘But I know next to nothing about you.’

      ‘That’s how I like it,’ he snapped.

      With all his relationships? Or just the one involving her that he’d have to adjust to? Could be he thought she was working out how much she could ask for child support. She contemplated letting him stew for a while, then realised how bitchy that was. Not so long ago he’d been sucker-punched with most men’s worst nightmare. Her memories of the day she’d learned about the baby were still sharp, and that had been months ago. Shock followed by excitement, followed by fear. Those emotions still rocked her some days. ‘For what it’s worth, I have no intention of demanding money from you to raise my daughter.’

      ‘Our daughter.’

      Kapow! So he’d accepted the fact he was a father. Or had he? Was this just a hiccup as he processed everything? Her head spun. It seemed too easy. Far too easy to be true. What was the catch? When no answers came to mind she focused on driving safely and getting to Harry’s Place in one piece.

      Wonder of wonders, there was a parking space right outside the main entrance. With her usual efficiency—baby brain on hold for once—she backed into it and turned off the engine.

      Our daughter.

      The knob came off the handle as she wound hard to close her window. ‘Stupid car. Something’s always falling off.’ Opening the door to allow some air flow through, she couldn’t stop her mind running away on her.

      My baby. Our baby.

      A knot formed in her gut, dread cramping her muscles. ‘I don’t expect anything of you.’

      ‘I’m starting to get the picture. Why didn’t you contact me about this? Apart from wanting nothing of me, wasn’t I entitled to know?’ His hand waved between them, sort of in the direction of her extended belly. As though he was struggling with the whole concept after all. Which made more sense and was a lot closer to the reaction she’d expected.

      The heat was building up rapidly and making her feel very light-headed. Shoving out of the car, she slammed the door, leant against it until her balance returned. Stepping onto the pavement, she told him, ‘It’s not like we knew each other.’ It was hard not to yell at him, to ram her words in his face.

      ‘Which gave you the right to decide I shouldn’t have anything to do with my child?’ The pewter of his eyes was now cold steel. His mouth had become a flat line that dragged his face down, making her realise it was the first time she’d seen him without a hint of a smile softening his expression. No, that wasn’t right. He’d looked stunned and shocked when he’d first seen her in the medical unit. No smile then either.

      ‘I always intended telling you after the birth.’ Her cheeks were getting hotter by the second, and not from the heat slamming up from the pavement.

      ‘Why not before?’ He stepped up beside her, dwarfing her with his size as he glared down at her.

      ‘It’s personal. Private.’ She so did not want Cooper hanging around for midwife appointments and examinations. No, thank you.

      ‘That’s it? Personal? Private?’ When she continued to watch him, he snapped, ‘It took two to tango in the first place. You can’t just kick me into touch and then haul me back as it suits you.’

      She gasped. She wasn’t doing that. ‘It’s not like that. I wanted this time to myself to get used to the fact my life’s changed irrevocably.’ She couldn’t tell him that every time she’d thought of emailing him vivid memories of being piggy in the middle of her parents’ disastrous marriage rolled in, and had her shutting down her good intentions. She’d been afraid to include Cooper in case her daughter had to grow up with the same pressures. Bad enough she knew next to nothing about good parenting, let alone adding Cooper to the mix. Tossing the hand grenade back at him, she asked, ‘What could you have done these past months?’

      ‘Supported you.’

      How? Money? Marriage? They were in the army, unable to move to be with someone even if they wanted to. She shuddered. ‘I don’t need that from you.’ Her friends would be there for her if—when—she asked. Her head spun. Happened a lot lately. The sun pounded her from above. Then the ground was rushing up to meet her.

      ‘Hey, easy.’ Strong arms wrapped around her, held her safe. Too safe. She liked these arms, remembered them holding her as they’d...made a baby.

      Sophie struggled to free herself of Cooper. This was another reason she hadn’t wanted him on the scene throughout her pregnancy. There’d been days when she’d gone into panic mode, wondering what on earth she was doing, going through with the pregnancy. But it wasn’t like there’d been any alternative. She’d never have an abortion. But the thought of raising a child was frightening. On those bad days she’d been vulnerable, and if Cooper had been around she might’ve clung to him, relative stranger or not. There was something about him that could easily undermine her resolve to go it alone and that was dangerous—for the three of them.

      Cooper kept his hand on her waist, and began walking her inside. ‘Let’s get out of this sun. It’s debilitating.’

      ‘It sure is.’

      So are the spikes of heat in my blood brought on by your touch.

      Her knees felt as firm as a piece of string, and her breathing was shallow.

      Sex in hard boots.

      Kelly’s words from that fateful day ricocheted around her skull. There’d been an instant attraction back then, one she’d fully intended ignoring. Seemed bombs could blow up more than the earth and buildings and people. All thoughts of staying clear of Cooper had gone AWOL when she’d leapt into his arms behind the accommodation block. Now he was with her, doing the same job to her internally as the sun was doing externally. Pregnancy had made her emotional, and this was just another example. Less than seven weeks to go and then she’d again be in charge of her hormones and everything they upset. Fingers crossed.

      First there was a conversation to be had. How could she have got pregnant to a man she’d known a few hours and never seen again? A man she knew zilch about—being a sexy hunk didn’t count. Except that’s what had got her into this situation in the first place.

      ‘Are you looking forward to becoming a mum?’ Cooper asked as he sat down opposite her at a small table inside, after ordering their drinks and some sandwiches.

      Sophie nodded slowly. ‘I am now.’ When she’d first seen the blue line on the stick she’d gone into denial. Being a mother had not been on her to-do list. That had ideas on it like climbing the Sydney Harbour Bridge, hiking in Greece, going to Iceland to see the Northern Lights. This...her hand touched her belly...was something she’d thought she’d consider later if and when she found the right man. Or if her biological clock switched on.

      ‘But not in the beginning.’ Cooper was studying her too intently for comfort. Looking for what? A history of madness or irresponsibility?

      ‘I’ve never been inclined to settle down.’ Too many things to see and do in this world to want to disappear behind a picket fence. Except that theory had slapped her across the face recently. Avoiding life was no longer an option. But Cooper wasn’t going to take advantage of these uncertainties. ‘Now I’m ready.’ Despite the panic that occasionally overwhelmed her, she could say, Bring it on. She couldn’t wait to meet her daughter.

      Their daughter.

      Eek, but this was awkward.

      Thankfully


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