Golden Steps to Respectability, Usefulness and Happiness. John Mather Austin
discreet youth will exclaim—"Nothing would gratify me more than to be honored and respected, as I advance in years; to move in good society; to have people seek my company, rather than shun it; to be looked up to as an example for others to imitate, and to enjoy the confidence of all around me."
Is not his the desire of the young of this large audience? Surely there can be none here so blind to the future, so lost to their own good, as to prefer a life of infamy and its ever-accompanying wretchedness, to respectability, prosperity, and true enjoyment? But how are these to be obtained? Respectability, prosperity, the good opinion of community, do not come simply at our bidding. We cannot reach forth our hands and take them, as we pluck the ripe fruit from the bending branch. Neither will wishing or hoping for them shower their blessings upon us. If we would obtain and enjoy them, we must labor for them—EARN them. They are only secured as the well-merited reward of a pure and useful life!
The first thing to be aimed at by the young, should be the establishment of a GOOD CHARACTER: In all their plans, anticipations, and prospects for future years, this should form the grand starting-point!—the chief corner-stone! It should be the foundation of every hope and thought of prosperity and happiness in days to come. It is the only basis on which such a hope can mature to full fruition. A good character, established in the season of youth, becomes a rich and productive moral soil to its possessor. Planted therein, the "Tree of Life" will spring forth in a vigorous growth. Its roots will strike deep and strong, in such a soil, and draw thence the utmost vigor and fruitfulness. Its trunk will grow up in majestic proportions—its wide-spreading branches will be clothed with a green luxuriant foliage, "goodly to look upon"—the most beautiful of blossoms will in due time, blush on every twig—and at length each limb and bough shall bend beneath the rich, golden fruit, ready to drop into the hand. Beneath its grateful shade you can find rest and repose, when the heat and burden of life come upon you. And of its delicious fruit, you can pluck and eat, and obtain refreshment and strength, when the soul becomes wearied with labor and care, or the weight of years. Would you behold such a tree? Remember it grows alone on the soil of a good reputation!! Labor to prepare such a soil.
Believe not, ye youthful, that God has made the path of virtue and religion hard and thorny. Believe not he has overhung it with dark clouds, and made it barren of fruit and beauty. Believe not that rugged rocks, and briers, and brambles, choke the way, and lacerate the limbs of those who would walk therein! No! he has made it a smooth and peaceful path—an easy and pleasant way.—"Wisdom's ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace."
The young who overlook these considerations—who lay their plans, and cherish their expectations, in reference to their future career, without any regard to the importance of a good character—who, in marking out their course, lose sight of the necessity of laboring to establish a worthy reputation to commence with—who, in building their hopes of success and happiness, are not convinced that "a good name" is the only foundation on which such hopes can legitimately rest—have commenced wrong. They have made a radical and lamentable MISTAKE at the outset. A mistake, which, unless speedily corrected, will prove most disastrous in all its influences, and be keenly felt and deplored throughout life.
Those who fall into error on this point, who view a good reputation as a matter of no moment—well enough if you can secure it without much trouble, but not worth laboring for, with zeal and perseverance—have placed themselves in a most critical position. They are like a ship in the midst of the wide wastes of ocean, without chart compass, or rudder, liable to be turned hither and thither by every fickle wind that blows, and dashed upon dangerous reefs by the heaving billows. Failing to see the importance of establishing a good character, they fall easy victims to sinful temptations, and, ere long, verging farther and farther from the path of rectitude, they at length find every fond hope, every fair prospect, blasted for life.
To a young man, a good character is the best capital he can possess, to start with in life. It is much better, and far more to be depended on than gold. Although money may aid in establishing a young man in business, under favorable circumstances, yet without a good character he cannot succeed. His want of reputation will undermine the best advantages, and failure, and ruin, will, sooner or later, overtake him with unerring certainty!!
When it is known that a young man is well-informed, industrious, attentive to business, economical, strictly temperate, and moral, a respecter of the Sabbath, the Bible, and religion, he cannot fail to obtain the good opinion and the confidence of the whole community. He will have friends on every hand, who will take pleasure in encouraging and assisting him. The wise and good will bestow their commendation upon him; and parents will point to him as an example for their children to imitate. Blessed with health, such a youth cannot fail of success and permanent happiness.
But let it be known that a young man is ignorant or indolent, that he is neglectful of business, or dishonest; that he is given to intemperance, or disposed to visit places of dissipation, or to associate with vicious companions—and what are his prospects? With either one or more of these evil qualifications fixed upon him, he is hedged out of the path of prosperity. To cover up such characteristics for a great length of time, is a moral impossibility. Remember this, I beg you. It is beyond the power of mortals to conceal vicious habits and propensities for any long period. And when once discovered, who will repose confidence in such a youth? Who will trust him, or encourage him, or countenance him? Who will give him employment? Who will confide anything to his oversight? Who will render him assistance in his business affairs, when he is straitened and in need of the aid of friends? Behold his prospects! How unpromising, how dark!! It is impossible for such a young man to succeed. No earthly power can confer prosperity upon him. He himself undermines his own welfare, blackens his own name, and dashes down the cup of life which a wise and good Providence has kindly placed to his lips, and calls upon him to drink.
If a good character, a spotless reputation, is all-essential to the prosperity of a young man, what must it not be to a young woman? A well-established character for morality and virtue is of great importance to people of every class, and in all circumstances. But to a young lady, a "good name" is a priceless jewel. It is everything—literally, EVERYTHING—to her. It will give her an attraction, a value, an importance, in the estimation of others, which nothing else can impart. In possession of a spotless character, she may reasonably hope for peace and happiness. But without such a character, she is nothing! Youth, beauty, dress, accomplishments, all gifts and qualities will be looked upon as naught, when tainted by a suspicious reputation! Nothing can atone for this, nothing can be allowed to take its place, nothing can give charm and attraction where it exists. When the character of a young woman is gone—all is gone! Thenceforward she can look for naught else but degradation and wretchedness.
The reputation of a young woman is of the most delicate texture. It requires not overt acts of actual wickedness to tarnish its brightness, and cast suspicion on its purity. Indiscreet language, careless deportment, a want of discrimination in regard to associates, even when no evil is done, or intended, will often bring into question her character, greatly to her injury. Many are the instances where a single word, spoken at random, in the giddy thoughtlessness of youthful vivacity, without the slightest thought of wrong, has cast a shadow upon the character of a young woman which it required years to efface. How important that every word uttered, and every deed performed, should be maturely weighed. A discreet lady will not only be careful to avoid evil itself, but will studiously refrain from everything which has even the appearance of evil.
"Whatever dims thy sense of truth,
Or stains thy purity,
Though light as breath of summer air,
Count it as sin to thee."
Young women frequently err in their understanding of what it is that gives them a good name, and imparts their chief attraction. Many seem to imagine that good looks, a gay attire, in the extreme of fashion, and a few showy attainments, constitute everything essential to make them interesting and attractive, and to establish a high reputation in the estimation of the other sex. Hence they seek for no other attainments. In this, they make a radical mistake. The charms contained in these qualities, are very shallow, very worthless, and very uncertain. There can no dependence be placed upon them.
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