Manhood is a Mindset. J. Colin Trisler
thinking enables you to make good choices in the first place. The man who thinks rationally is the man who can see the world as it truly is. He can distinguish between truth and falsehood. And he is wise not because he perceives the truth, but because he chooses to think and act in accord with the truth. This makes him a rational man.
The truth is that which corresponds to reality—that which is real. Reality itself is an objective and absolute fact. Existence is what it is, and it exists independent of our opinions or wishes or imaginations. Reality is absolute and firm. The truth, therefore, is absolute and firm. This means the truth is always true. Neither the passage of time nor the cycle of culture can change it. Rationality is the recognition of and the submission to reality. And the rational man is the one who lives in uncompromised harmony with that reality. With the truth. Rational thinking is an essential aspect of the wisdom equation because it grounds your decisions in the truth. A wise man doesn’t have to be brilliant. But he must think reasonably. He must be rational.
For an example of rational thinking in practice, look once again to the example of Indiana Jones in the Grail chamber. Indy knew Jesus was a modest carpenter and not a man of worldly means. Based on this fact, he deduced that the cup of Christ would not be some lavish royal vessel (as Donovan thought it should be). It would instead match the humble personality of a King who came not to be served but to serve (Mark 10:45). Unlike Donovan, Indy didn’t base his choice on what he thought the Grail should look like. He instead chose a cup that was battered and worn and humble in outward appearance, like its true Owner.4 Indy committed himself to a rational thought process which followed the facts rather than his personal preferences. And his success in choosing the one true Grail testifies to my point: The man who thinks rationally is a man destined to make wise decisions.
Son, God has blessed you with a miraculous, one-of-a-kind mind that is like nothing else on this earth. He has equipped you with the ability to think: to know, analyze, understand, discern, prioritize, and decide. A man of true wisdom is a man who knows not simply what to think, but how to think. He knows how to distinguish good from evil. Right from wrong. Truth from lies. Wisdom from foolishness. A wise man never stops thinking. He uses his mind to discover the truth. And he exercises wisdom when he strives to live a rational life—that is, in harmony with the God-given truth that governs reality.
Skill. Thinking, however, is time wasted unless it is a precursor to action. Knowledge is worthless, morality is ineffective, and rationality is pointless until they are brought to life by skillful action in real-world situations. A man of true wisdom is serious about his life and the choices he makes. He is wise because he carries out his knowledgeable, moral, and rational decisions with an effective degree of skill. Thus he is productive in achieving his goals. In short, he is both a thinker and a doer—for as Jesus said, true wisdom is vindicated by her deeds (Matt 11:19; see also Jas 1:22–25).
In the Grail chamber, Indiana Jones didn’t hesitate to act. He saved his father’s life. He overcame the armies of darkness. And he preserved the Grail’s integrity because he was confident enough to bring his decisions to life in real-world situations. Son, as Indy proved, personal values are worthless unless you have the grit to act on them. Even in the face of extreme danger. The man who has the will to act is the man who achieves real-world success with the choices he makes.
On paper, the wisdom equation is straightforward and simple. But real life doesn’t exist on a wrinkle-free piece of two-dimensional paper. Nor does it unfold within the safe confines of a movie screen. It unfolds in the chaotic four-dimensional space of the here-and-now.
So how does the wisdom equation play out in real life? With all due respect to fictional heroes like Indiana Jones, the best way to answer that question is to observe the behavior of a living, breathing, real-world wise man.
And what better case study is there to learn from than that of the wisest man who ever lived?
Wisdom in Real Life
Son, that man is not me.
I am not the wisest man who ever lived. I am not a genius, nor do I claim to know all there is to know about life. I am, however, a thinker. I’m also a doer. That means I make great efforts to understand how the world works and I work just as hard to govern my life by the truth that governs our existence. I may not be a world-renowned action hero like Indiana Jones, but I am a wise man—and I am your father. And those two facts make me more qualified than any other person on this planet to provide you with the instruction you need to grow into a man of wisdom and strength.
My goal as a father is simple: I want to help you transform from a child into a man. To achieve this goal, I will do what a good father does. I will honor my God-given responsibility and train you up in the truth so you can learn how to think like a man, how to act like a man, and how to build a life worthy of a man. I will instruct you in the wisdom you need to get up off the couch, go to work in the real world, and reap the rewards of a meaningful life. I will come alongside you, not as a drill sergeant or a boss, but as your daddy—and I will teach you how to handle the responsibilities of manhood.
I will guide you every step of the way—but I will not live your life for you. I will protect you—but I will not overprotect you. I will provide for you as I teach you what it means to be self-reliant. I will tell you what you need to hear, not just what you want to hear—but you have my word: I will always speak to you with a sense of love and respect.
My hope is that together, as a team, you and I will take that unsophisticated mess of testosterone and insecurity the world calls adolescence and mold it into a chivalrous mindset of godly masculinity.
Son, I’m here to let you know that manhood starts not in the muscles, but in the mind. And wisdom is the key that unlocks that treasure chest of masculinity within you. We are going to unlock that treasure together. But we’ll need a guide to show us how it’s done. Fortunately for us, I know just the man for the job. The man God himself proclaimed to be the wisest man who ever lived.
Israel’s King Solomon.
With these letters, I will guide you through the mind of the world’s wisest man. We’re going to go verse by verse through the first nine chapters of the biblical book of Proverbs. Solomon dedicated these chapters to instructing his son in the principles of godly wisdom and the practices of authentic masculinity.5 He looked to God as the ultimate source of wisdom. And I will do the same.
I have followed Solomon’s lead and written this book as a personalized discourse. As a series of letters to you, my son. These letters are for you because the truth of God’s wisdom is the best instruction I could ever give you. Be aware, though, that the wisdom in these letters did not originate with me. I am not qualified to hand out eternal truths (I can only discover them). God, however, is very much qualified to define wisdom and truth. And it’s his divinely inspired wisdom and truth that I will impart to you because that is my highest responsibility as your earthly father.
I have used Solomon’s proverbial discourse as the basis for these letters because even though Solomon and his son lived thousands of years ago, they were regular people just like you and me: a father and his son, men created in the image of God, seeking to live wise and meaningful lives in a world filled with foolishness and confusion.
We are going to learn by example. By observing a wise and insightful man. Let’s begin our study by looking to the good example of Solomon to understand what wisdom looks like in real life.
Solomon, the Wisest Man
Prov 1:1
In the time of the Old Testament, God raised up Israel as his special people to receive and proclaim the wisdom of his word.
God blessed Israel with many wise and mighty leaders, beginning with Abraham and continuing with other wise men like Moses, Joshua, and Solomon’s father, King David. David was so devoted to walking in the wisdom of the Lord that the Bible calls him a man after God’s own heart (1 Sam 13:14; Acts 13:22). He was a brave warrior, a wise king, and a godly but imperfect man who, like every human being who has ever lived, had moments in his life when he abandoned God’s wisdom and lapsed into foolishness. Although his sins rendered real consequences,