The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter. Petronius Arbiter

      TO THE RIGHT HONOURABLE HENRY EARL OF RUMNEY

       Master-General of Their Majesties Ordinance, and of Their Majesties most Honourable Privy-Council, Constable of Dover-Castle, and Lord Warden of the Cinque-Ports.

      My Lord,

      Good men think the meanest friend no more to be dispis'd, than the politick the meanest enemy; and the generous would be as inquisitive to discover an unknown esteem for 'em, as the cautious an unknown hatred: This I say to plead myself into the number of those you know for your admirers; and that the world may know it, give me leave to present you with a translation of Petronius, and to absolve all my offences against him, by introducing him into so agreeable company. You're happy, my Lord, in the most elegant part of his character, in the gallantry and wit of a polite gentleman, mixt with the observation and conduct of a man of publik employments; And since all share the benefit of you,'tis the duty of all to confess their sence of it, I had almost said, to return, as they cou'd, the favour, and like a true author, made that my gratitude which may prove your trouble: But what flatters me most out of the apprehensions of your dislike, is the gentleman-like pleasantry of the work, where you meet with variety of ridicule on the subject of Nero's court, an agreeable air of humour in a ramble through schools, bagnio's temples, and markets; wit and gallantry in armours, with moral reflections on almost every accident of humane life. In short, my Lord, I shall be very proud to please a Sidney, an house fertile, of extraordinary genio's, whose every member deserves his own Sir Philip to celebrate him; whose characters are romances to the rest of mankind, but real life in his own family.

      I am, my Lord, Your Lordships most devoted Humble Servant, W. BURNABY.

      THE PREFACE

       Table of Contents

      The Moors ('tis said) us'd to cast their newborn children into the sea, and only if they swam would think 'em worth their care; but mine, with more neglect, I turn into the world, for sink or swim, I have done all I design'd for't. I have already, with as much satisfaction as Aeneas in a cloud heard Dido praise him, heard the Beaux-Criticks condemn this translation before they saw it, and with as much judgment as if they had: And after they had prophetically discover'd all the flaws in the turns of thought, the cadence of periods, and had almost brought in Epick and Drama, they supt their coffee, took snuff, and charitably concluded to send Briscoe the pye-woman to help off with his books. Well, I have nothing to say, but that these brisk gentlemen that draw without occasion, must put up without satisfaction.

      After the injury of 1700 years, or better, and the several editions in Quarto, Octavo, Duodecimo, etc., with their respective notes to little purpose; for these annotators upon matters of no difficulty, are so tedious, that you can't get rid of their enlargements without sleeping, but at any real knot are too modest to interrupt any man's Curiosity in the untying of it. After so many years, I say, it happened upon the taking of Belgrade this author was made entire; made so because the new is suspected to be illegitimate: But it has so many features of the lawful father, that he was at least thought of when 'twas got. Now the story's made out, the character of Lycas alter'd, and Petronius freed from the imputation of not making divine or humane justice pursue an ill-spent life.

      As to the translation, the other hand, I believe, has been very careful; but if my part don't satisfie the world, I should be glad to see my self reveng'd in a better version; and though it may prove no difficult province to improve what I have done, I shall yet have the credit of the first attempt.

      If any of the fine gentlemen should be angry after they have read it, as some, to save that trouble, have before; and protest I've yet debauch't Petronius, and robb'd him of his language, his only purity, I hope we shall shortly be reconciled, for I have some very pretty new songs ready for the press: If this satisfies them, I'll venture to tell others that I have drest the meaning of the original as modestly as I could, but to have quite hid the obscaenity, I thought, were to invent, not translate.

      As for the ladies, if any too-discerning antiquated hypocrite (for only such I fear) shou'd be angry with the beastly author; let the work be my advocate, where the little liberties I take, as modestly betray a broad meaning, as blushing when a man tells the story.

      Those who object, that things of this nature ought not to he translated, must arraign the versions of Juvenal Suetonius, etc., but what Suetonius thought excusable in History, any sober man will think much more allowable in Satyr: Nor can this be offensive to good-manners, since the gross part here is the displaying of vices of that dye, that there's an abhorrence even in nature from 'em; nor is it possible that any ill man can talk a good one into a new frame or composition; nay, perhaps it may be applicable to a good use, to see our own happiness, that we know that to be opposite to humanity it self, which some of the ancients were deluded even to practise as wit and gallantry, thus I'm so far from being toucht in expressing those crimes, that I think it makes the more for me, the more they're detested.

      If I have alter'd or added to the author, it was either to render those customs of the Romans that were analogous to ours, by what was more familiar to us, or to prevent a note by enlarging on others where I found 'em.

      The verse of both parts are mine, and I have taken a great liberty in 'em; and tho' I believe there I have not wrong'd the original, yet all will not amount to call them good.

      The money at first I made English coin, but not the exact worth, because it would have been odd in some places to have brought in pence and farthings; as when the thousand sesterces are offered for Gito, it would not be consistent with the haste they were in to offer so many pounds, so many shillings, and so many pence: I therefore proportioned a sum to the story without casting up the sesterces; thus they went to the press: But advis'd either to give the just value or the Roman coin, I resolv'd on the latter for the reasons I have given, and alter'd the summs as the proofs came to my hands; but trusting the care of one sheet to a friend, the summ of 2000 crowns past unalter'd.

      W. B.

      THE SATYRICON OF PETRONIUS

      THE SATYR OF TITUS PETRONIUS ARBITER

      With its Fragments, recover'd at Buda, 1688.

      PART ONE

      "I promis'd you an account of what befel me, and am now resolv'd to be as good as my word, being so met to our desires; not only to improve our learning, but to be merry, and put life in our discourse with pleasanter tales.

      "Fabricius Vejento has already, and that wittily, handled the juggle of religion, and withal discover'd with what impudence and