The Anxiety of Kalix the Werewolf. Martin Millar
asleep so we were drinking some more and then I asked him if he’d liked to see my collection of Hello Kitty T-shirts and then we just sort of ended up in my bed.” Vex grinned, very broadly. Her hair was a chaotic mess of jagged blonde spikes, pointing in all directions. “So now he’s my boyfriend!”
“You mean you slept together?”
Vex nodded and looked pleased. Moonglow did her best to look pleased too, though she was far from certain that a drunken encounter with a guitarist really counted as having a boyfriend.
“When he left this morning he said he’d call me.”
“That’s nice,” said Moonglow.
Vex rose from Moonglow’s bed, threw open the curtains and danced around the room.
“I really think it’s time I had a boyfriend. And he likes everything I like! He’s a big fan of Tokyo Top Pop Boom Boom Girl.” Vex paused and frowned. “Well, I think he is. My memory’s a bit hazy.”
To Moonglow’s distress, Vex sat on her bed again.
“He’s really nice looking. And he plays guitar in my favorite band! I can’t wait to see him play onstage again now that he’s my boyfriend.”
“When’s he going to call you?” asked Moonglow.
“He didn’t say. Soon, probably. Any minute, I expect. I wonder if Daniel’s feeling any better? I really want to tell him about my boyfriend!”
Vex hurried out of Moonglow’s bedroom. Moonglow shook her head, then struggled to rise. She wrapped herself in her black dressing gown and made her way carefully downstairs. Beauty and Delicious were sleeping on the living room floor, on a bed made from cushions and spare duvets that Moonglow had made up for them. The twins had crawled into it only a few hours ago, very unsteadily. Now, having changed back to human while they slept, as the dawn arrived, they looked peaceful, with their pink and blue hair splayed out over their cushions and onto the carpet. The cat had settled down with them but woke as Moonglow crept by and followed her to the kitchen.
“You love sleeping with werewolves, don’t you?” said Moonglow. She opened a tin of cat food and filled the cat’s bowl before putting the kettle on. As she waited for it to boil, Moonglow reflected on their party. It had gone well, as far as she could remember. Kalix had seemed to enjoy herself, apart from the brief hostility between her and Decembrius. That had passed quickly, though Decembrius had spent the rest of the night sulking. So had Daniel. But Beauty, Delicious and Vex had created enough of a party atmosphere for anyone. As a celebration for Kalix’s birthday, it had been a success.
There were some heavy, stumbling footsteps outside the kitchen. Daniel appeared, wearing an ancient T-shirt and a crumpled pair of dark khaki shorts. His hair, which he’d grown longer in recent months, was plastered to his forehead.
“I’m going to kill Vex,” he mumbled.
“Maybe you should have tea first?” said Moonglow.
“OK. But then I’m really going to kill her.” Daniel sat on the kitchen floor, resting his back against a cabinet. “I feel terrible. Vex woke me up and started babbling about her boyfriend. I hate him already and I don’t even know who he is.”
“It’s Pete.”
“The guitarist? Isn’t he meant to be in love with Dominil or something?”
Moonglow shrugged.
“I think I’m going to be sick,” said Daniel. “Is the tea ready?”
Moonglow poured boiling water from the kettle into the teapot, but by the time she’d hunted out two clean mugs, Daniel had left the kitchen in a hurry, looking unwell.
At least that wasn’t too uncomfortable, thought Moonglow. She hadn’t been looking forward to her first encounter with Daniel after rejecting his advances in the cinema. Perhaps it was fortunate that the encounter had occurred while Daniel was feeling so poorly.
But he won’t have a hangover forever, Moonglow realized. It’s still going to be awkward later.
Moonglow felt dissatisfied. Now she was going to feel uncomfortable in her own house. What had Daniel been thinking about, trying to kiss her unexpectedly like that? No wonder she’d pushed him off. It was lucky the film had been entertaining and occupied everyone’s attention. Otherwise Moonglow and Daniel might have found themselves with a large audience for their uncomfortable love scene.
“No doubt everyone’s heard about it by now.” Moonglow knew there was no chance of the incident being politely ignored. Vex would have inevitably learned all about it and told everyone.
“They’re probably discussing it in Malveria’s palace at this moment.” Moonglow sighed. She took her tea and headed swiftly upstairs to her room, hoping to avoid Vex. Moonglow didn’t feel like enduring another long description from the young Fire Elemental about how good it was to have a boyfriend.
I bet he never calls her anyway, she thought, and then felt a little ashamed for thinking mean thoughts.
Old Minerva MacRinnalch’s mountain stood at one end of Glen Marbauch, a deep, glacial valley in a very remote part of the Scottish Highlands. At the other end of the glen was the tiny village of Marbauch, containing only a few cottages and a single shop. Dominil had booked two rooms in a tiny bed-and-breakfast. After successfully negotiating the long drive from Inverness, she halted the car before reaching the village.
The two werewolves looked along the valley. It was raining and, in the distance, under the gray sky, Mount Marbauch looked steep, dark and not welcoming.
“Maybe we should have gone to a clinic,” said Kalix.
“Too late now,” replied Dominil. “Anyway, we can’t. The standard treatments for addiction don’t agree with werewolf physiology.”
“I know,” sighed Kalix. “I was really sick after I took methadone.”
“Who gave you that?”
“No one. One time when I couldn’t afford laudanum I broke into a chemist and stole it.”
Kalix gazed at the mountain, and her heart sank even further. The gray slopes were impressive in their way. Inspiring even, as scenery. But as a place to undergo treatment for addiction, Kalix couldn’t help thinking they’d made a terrible mistake.
“Do we have to climb it?”
“Minerva will meet us at the foot. I understand there’s a pathway to the top.”
“Is it a steep path? Can you fall off?” Kalix’s was feeling more and more depressed. She was at least relieved to hear there was a path. She’d had a vision of herself struggling up the mountain with ropes and didn’t think she could manage it.
They parked outside the small bed-and-breakfast. There were a few other houses in the distance; hardly enough to qualify as even a village. A few hours ago in London, it had been warm and sunny, but here the rain fell steadily and there was a cold wind. Kalix shivered. She had poor resistance to the elements, much less than would have been expected from a werewolf. It was part of the effect that the drug had on her system.
Dominil wondered if the locals knew that a powerful werewolf sorcerer lived at the far end of the glen. If they did, might they also suspect that she and Kalix were werewolves too? If the landlady did suspect anything, she didn’t show it. While she couldn’t hide her surprise at the sight of Dominil’s icy white hair, she greeted the pair convivially.
“We get a lot of walkers around these parts in the summer,” she said. “Are you here for the scenery?”
“Yes,” said Dominil. “We like to get back to Scotland when we can.”
Dominil didn’t sound Scottish. She’d abandoned her accent at Oxford.