Coaching with Heart. Jerry Lynch
and empower them but they must want to move forward and when they do, the motivation comes from within. Change and growth is an extraordinary inner process and the work of a dancing heart leader is to be patient, persevere, and persist on nurturing and supporting, guiding and directing others in an environment that is emotionally safe from failure and taking risks. Your work as leader and coach is to add fuel to an already burning pilot light within your protégés. When you create a safe environment, you accelerate the process of readiness for others to be led. From this safe, sacred place, they will open their hearts to you and give you permission to enter. When you do, you will be able to do your best work. You will inspire, empower, and influence them to believe in themselves, to believe in you and to believe that they can be and do something other than ordinary.
If those you lead and coach are not moving forward, don’t call 911 and don’t try to motivate them, that is impossible to do. Instead, create a healthy relationship and environment that is emotionally safe (where failure is okay because it is our best teacher), listen to them, offer your help, and become the beacon that lights up the path. If they don’t follow, keep trying, don’t give up, don’t ever give up and do not take it personally. Everyone has a different learning curve. And don’t disregard the notion that following your path, what you think is best for everyone, may not be in their best interests. It’s not about you, you’re not a bad or inept coach. If you discover that they want out, if they want something different, are burned out, simply ask if they want you to release them to follow their hearts and discover what excites and energizes them. In another sense, to do such, to release them on another path is to be a very good coach. They will love you forever. I never witnessed a bus driver get off the bus and pull, shove, or coerce a pedestrian to get on board. But recently a driver asked me at the airport, “Are you getting on?” To which I replied, “No, thank you. I am waiting for someone to pick me up.” Coaching is not much different. Ask those you lead: do you still want me to coach you, to bring you along? If they respond “no,” then you might want to pursue this further. You want your athletes to be happy, to play for all the right reasons. It makes your life happier and easier.
BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE
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