Caressless. Heru Psy.D. EL
with black paten leather shoes with gold inserts and his shirt unbuttoned with his gold chain with a big letter E hanging at the end, a gold ring with a big diamond shaped in the letter E on his pinkie finger was hard not to notice. “Sandra can you describe Earl to me a little more?” “Well he was about 5’-10 kinda heavy maybe about 250 lbs light skinned and he had his hair processed and combed to the side with a gold front tooth. Earl was nice to me in the beginning but that would change.” As Sandra was telling me her story I noticed she would look me directly in my eyes when she was face to face with her characters in her story but gazed off thru the window facing Lake Michigan as she set the scene. Just then the secretary buzzed my phone and told me my 3pm was ready. “Well Sandra I like the way you opened up this session I look forward to making some more progress next Wednesday.” Dr. Howard I wish I had more time because this feels good to release some of this weight that I have had to carry all these years.” “You are doing well just be patient and it will flow out easy” “Thank you Dr. Howard see you next week.” My next client was a very handsome man who was a 34 year old virgin as he was telling me his story I realized his biggest fear was what if I don’t perform good in sex. He was not gay but said that his fear seemed to stem from the fact that his 4 older sisters and Mother would tell him these negative stories about the men they would have in bed. He would hear comments like “he couldn’t last but 5 minutes” or “Girl he came too fast” “ His dick was too short” “ He don’t know how to lick my pussy right” or “He can’t fuck”
He said that he has allowed this fear to keep him from the bedrooms of many gorgeous women who have now spread rumors that he must be gay if he won’t engage them in sex.
I must help this Brother because “A hard dick is a terrible thing to waste” in my book I’m sure I would get an Amen from the sisters out there. Another day, another story a lifetime of chain reactions I say to myself as I press the garage button on the elevator. Heading to my black Toyota Camry thinking I guess since I’m in the big bucks now maybe I should get that Mercedes now, I don’t have any more college loans or wife and children, why not? As I drove out of my office garage at 5:15 ready to deal with the heart of rush hour traffic I can’t help but wonder as I see the hundreds of people moving to and fro down Michigan Ave, as I gaze into their faces I wonder how many stories are you hiding behind those stoic looks and suppressed smiles? Maybe I’ll see some of you soon, or could some Doctor be saying the same about me? Time will tell. I make it to my apartment on Marine Drive on the North side of Chicago as I approach the elevator I notice one of the new tenets that just moved in on the same floor I helped her with a heavy box last Saturday but I can’t remember her name to save my life, as fine as she is I don’t see how I could have forgotten. “Hi how is the new apartment coming along?” as she turned around I could see the lovely shape of her lips and gorgeous eyes I’m always a sucker for the eyes, “hello Dr. Howard” she said with a cute little, smile damn she remembered my name “I want to thank you again for helping me with that box I don’t know how I got it that far, my girlfriends abandoned me when it came to that heavy box they weren’t going to break all of their nails that day.” “Oh you’re welcome I have been known to have flashes of chivalry at times.” “I can tell your mother did a good job you’ve got gentleman written all over you. I bet you can tell me where the best seafood restaurants are around here.” “I sure can its Nicks right at Clark and Howard Ave.” “I think I might check that place out, I’ve been longing for some good Lobster.” “I don’t think you will be disappointed. (I thought to myself that could be my queue to ask her out for dinner? The elevator opened and like my Father always told me the reason why men let woman walk in first is so you can check that ass out. She turned around and glanced up at me” I bet a lot of people tell you look like Eddie Murphy don’t they?” “I get that a lot lately.” “Only your taller and got muscles, Dr Howard why is the number 13 missing on the elevator key pad?” “Well I’ve been told that some construction crews were superstitious so they would never build a thirteenth floor to avoid unlucky accidents.” “So Dr. Howard us being on this elevator together is no accident”, she turned toward me and winked. “I responded maybe I planned it that way what do you think? DING! Oh I guess this is our floor 14.”” Since I’m the only gentleman here I will allow you to exit first we both chuckled as we walked down the hall way I’m thinking to my self as she walked slightly ahead of me puttin on a show with them sexy hips and rhythmical walk those nice leather boots she was wearing were making light little thumps as she glided down the hallway Howard I said to myself you need to make a decision real quick because she is too close for a playa like you, just say good evening and don’t add another link in the chain of dick to pussy. “Well goodnight you have a restful evening” “goodnight Dr. Howard maybe while your taking your shower you can remember my name” she laughed out as she closed her door not giving me a chance to ask her. She got me good. Oh boy you know if I start bangin that, she will definitely be drama that’s just too close for comfort. One of my rules has always been, never where you live or where you work. But got-damn! She fine! Whatever her name is, damn what is her name?? I remember her girlfriend called her Ray but that’s got to be a nick name because she told me something else, an unusual name. What the hell I got to get to my chill zone I threw my keys on the counter next to the unopened mail and the usual Chinese restaurant flyers, Lincoln insurance ads. It felt so good slipping my one month old black Farragamos off my feet, nice shoes but they need a little more wear to be an all day shoe. I quickly undressed and threw my pants across my neatly made up bed, my mother would be proud to know one of her teachings stuck. As the warm and steamy water from the shower covered my body I thought about Sandra and the millions of young girls whose young experiences make up today’s woman we see weave in and out of our lives for some reason she seemed like she had a ton of stories behind those big brown eyes. This was one I looked forward to the next session almost like a sequel to a mystery story. I need to get to bed early tonight, tomorrow is a busy day.
Friday
Thank God its Friday says Tom Joyner on my radio as I cruised down Lake Shore Drive it was a beautiful sun rise that warmed the left side of my face. Just two appointments today 10:30 am 12:30 and I'm free until Tuesday! My secretary Lisa was really keeping everything working smoothly for me, but lately, I can see that "I've been here for a year now I need a raise look in her eyes" especially now she knows about that the new contract with the City translates into more work for her. I think I'll beat here to the punch. I walked into the office and that sweet aroma of fresh coffee hit my nose. There she was putting paper into the fax machine being her usual efficient self. “Good morning Lisa” “Good Morning Dr Howard” “You know Lisa before my 10:30 we need to have an official office meeting.” She looked over her shoulder at me with a puzzling look like she didn't know what to expect. Lisa always looks so professional with her business suites and designer shoes. Lisa sat down with a half smile and softly asked “what’s on the agenda Dr. Howard.” "You are" I said quickly, matter of fact I'm going to fix you a cup of coffee I already know you take 4 sugars and 2 creams right? She replied “I never knew you noticed Dr Howard what are you up to you’re kind of making me nervous” as she looked back over her shoulder as I approached the desk with two coffees. I sat down I replied " well Lisa I'm sure you know that the Ole Boy Network of white corporate America always takes the very best of our brothers and sisters into their organizations which leaves us Black employers with the low skilled leftovers or people that nobody wants. I said that to say this. I Dr Howard James proclaimed this day to be Lisa Appreciation day by first saying how fortunate I am to have such a sterling example of not only a fine human being but the best damn secretary I could ever have. I therefore commission you a salary increase starting January 1st from $25,000 a year to $30,000. What do you say? Lisa says sarcastically "can I think about it for a while?" and abruptly says “I'll take it.” “Thank You! Thank! You Dr Howard I just think you are very good at what you do and I just want to say I applaud you for being so professional and in the year I have been here, unlike other Managers I've had you have always been respectful to me. That makes working here very fulfilling.” “That’s good to hear Lisa I've always believed that a great working environment makes for a successful day. I extended my hand out for a hand shake to seal to agreement, and notice a very wide smile on her face almost a look of admiration in her eyes, she softly repeats “thank you so much Dr. Howard.” “Okay back to work