Tri-level Identity Crisis. Группа авторов
persons who have already been serving in recognized institutions and positions in their home country. They have been living in decent homes, and their kids have been attending private schools, which are affordable to the middle-class since public education is usually not desirable. Most of these people are regarded as dignified leaders in their communities. In most cases, they have live-in servants who cater to all the household needs, not necessarily because they are very rich but because it is the norm: servants are affordable and provide a necessary security against burglary. Some, especially married men, do not launder or iron their own clothes, or cook their own meals, or wash dishes.
Yet, because of the popular exposure to the West as a land of opportunity and the general mindset of the West as more developed and a first world country, the prospect of living and making an even better life in the first world captures their excitement. That is, until they arrive. In a couple of weeks reality sets in. One pastor whose experience was the typical immigrant loss of status shock captured the experience in these words:
“At home I was respected, catered to by everyone around me, rubbed shoulders with heads of the state as their pastor, and in one month in the US I became a poor beggar who relied on the wishes of my sponsors. My children could not understand why they had to share a bedroom in our two-room school apartment when at our home in Africa they each had a huge room with en-suite bathroom.”
The loss of status is not only associated with loss of material resources but also, and maybe more detrimental, the loss of a place of honor in the society and its ensuing impact on the ego and sense of self. The community leader who had an administrative assistant and hundreds of workers under his supervision, now becomes a student who according to immigration requirements can only work in the educational institution that sponsors his Visa. Unfortunately, the educational institution, because of limited work-study positions and institutionalized prejudice, only has the lowest of jobs open to international students. So the corporate manager or esteemed pastor in his country now finds himself/herself a cook in the school kitchen, or a custodian to clean toilets. Except for the few who come on a full scholarship (usually one international student per year or in some institution every two to four years), all international students somehow have to take the “lowest” paying job within the institution to survive! Men from these communities have the hardest time transitioning to these statuses because of the high esteem with which they are held back in their countries of origin. Women make the transition easier because of their greater resiliency and coping resources, developed from years of demand for their versatility and gender discrimination in their own countries.
Gender Roles Adjustments
Many men will therefore try to hold onto their status at least in the home where they can still wield some power. In many situations, this also becomes a battlefield with wives who, now without help of house servants, are overwhelmed and demand the fair share of responsibilities from their husbands. If the man was raised very traditionally with regard to gender expectations, the very necessity to be involved in the daily affairs of the home as cooking, cleaning, or changing diapers becomes yet another blow to his manhood. The impact of loss of status ripples through the whole family system: greater conflict between spouses leads to emotional withdrawal and depression, making them emotionally unavailable to each other at a time when they really need each other because of lack of meaningful community. The less supportive of each other they become, the less emotionally available they are to the nurture of their children. The more their status is eroded both at home and in society, the less confident they feel, and the more they mirror insecurity to their children.
It does not help the situation when generally the American society favors the woman of color over their men because of the stereotypical association of crime and violence with men of color. Often this translates to greater opportunities for the immigrant wife rather than her husband in terms of finding jobs, scholarships or promotions—yet another blow to the status for the man!
Challenges of Immigration Status
The passage to the US in recent years for most first generation immigrants is gained either in pursuit of education, through the green-card lottery, via an application for an HB-1 work visa for skilled profession labor, or through illegal immigration via the borders. Visas have their own specific requirements and time limits to maintain one’s legal status. Hence, each passage poses its own set of challenges to the individual and family in general. For instance, those families that come on student Visa, usually have the F-1 or the J-1 visa. The spouse would then have a F-2 or J-2 Visa and is not allowed to work at all under the under this visa status, while the spouse with an F-1 Visa can only work the lowest paying jobs in their educational institution. In a country where life is generally expensive, this means the family must live below poverty level with very few forms of social help. Even when help is available, most immigrants are not aware of these resources. Some, even though aware, choose not to access it because of shame associated with coming from a place where they could adequately provide for their family.
The J-2 Visa has more leeway in terms of accessing work but even then, the holders experience a blow to their sense of self because the skills which may have been well respected in their countries are not recognized when they migrate. I am reminded a friend who was a well-accomplished dentist in Kenya, owning his own dental clinic and a staff of nine. In his country he was renowned, generally referred to as “Daktari” (Doctor)—one of the highest titles in the community. He had just lost his wife and wanted to give his children a new start by migrating to the United States. He followed all the proper channels thinking that when he got here he could easily get a job with his almost twenty years of dental experience. His first big shock was to discover that his whole training and experience was equivalent to zero years in the US. To even qualify to work as a dental hygienist or assistant he would have to go back to school. He bit the bullet and started a journey of seven years in dental school. The irony is that during his residency, the instructors usually looked up to him for insights and advice when faced with challenging dental work. Today, he owns three clinics in the U.S.A.—an accomplishment that required a long, humiliating journey. On the same vein, I met a lady who migrated after marrying her spouse who was already living in the US. In her country of origin, she had risen to a managerial position in one of the largest banks in her native country. When she migrated she expected to easily get back into her banking line since she had an undergraduate and a Master of Arts degree in banking and economics, only to realize that her degrees meant nothing in the USA. She could not even get a job as a teller in a bank because she was told she was over-qualified.
There is the also the plight of those who have no legal status because their Visa had expired or because they came without more permanent papers. Their challenge is even worse because they have to take jobs that are paid under the table and below minimum wage to support their families. They are constantly in hiding and must strictly instruct their children on how to avoid the law. The children are aware of their precarious position but must wrestle with the existential questions of “why them?” The children find themselves in constant dissonance about themselves and their families, noting the differences in social and economic status of families that surround them. The school system allows their children to be enrolled—but only through high school. After high school, no college will enroll their children. I am reminded of a family in a small town in Central Nebraska whose parents were some of the sweetest, most abiding citizens I knew. The small community loved them because they were helpful and polite. They had lived in this community for a long time but always took care not to get too close to anyone for fear that they might discover that they did not have papers. The wife always expressed how much she would have loved to go to the community college close by but could not. When the son, one of the most obedient and smart kids in the school, turned sixteen, I asked naively if he was excited that he could now drive. His mother was in tears and said he cannot get a driver’s license. I understood exactly what she meant. The son lived through being taunted for not driving by his fellow classmate who could not be told the truth. Then when he completed high school, he had to face the fact that he could not enroll in college like his friends. How can anyone say young people are on the same playing ground and should just apply themselves? There are tons of stories of varied life experiences that tell us status matters in the mental, spiritual and economic welfare of first generation immigrant children.
Response to Prejudice