Sex in a Tent. Michelle Waitzman
there was no fresh snow and it was incredibly foggy every day, but we were in the Alps, so we weren’t complaining. In the evenings, we joined our friends for wonderful family meals.
One day, the sun finally came out, so Greg and I decided to take a drive to a different ski area, Claviere.
When Greg plays, he likes do things a more “interesting” way. With snowboarding, this means hiking to reach good powder. Although I am often willing to come along, I tend to be lazy and lethargic after lunch. Needless to say, when Greg picked up his board and started hiking out to a ridge, I wasn’t thrilled. In fact, I was feeling quite nauseated hiking after the meal. Can’t we, for once, take it a bit easy? I thought. I might even admit to being a bit whiny. Greg was urging me on. When he stopped so I could sit and rest, I thought, Wow, I got off easy.
It was beautiful: We were sitting on a knife-edge ridge surrounded by snow-covered peaks. In the distant valley, we could see the alpine towns. This is my memory of what happened next (Greg has a somewhat different version):
Greg: “Is this pretty?”
Me: “Yes.”
Greg: “Is it romantic?”
Me: “Yes.”
Greg: “No, really, I mean, is it really romantic?”
Well, I could hardly think because my heart started beating really fast as I said, “Yessss……”
Then Greg got down on his knees in the snow and pulled out a box wrapped in a Borders coupon. I don’t remember the entire conversation clearly from that point on because I was too busy crying. I think he said he got me a 25-percent-off Borders coupon, and I said I always wanted that. Underneath was a little blue box with a ring inside. He proposed, and I said yes.
We sat there for a while. I was very excited that no one else knew our little secret, except for the skiers hanging out on the hut’s deck. We decide to go down, and I had an awesome afternoon scoring freshies in the trees.
On the way back, we stopped by the town of Cesana to walk around. At this point, I no longer wanted to keep the secret. I wanted to tell someone, anyone. We went to a wine bar and ordered two glasses of Barolo. I asked Greg if I could tell our waitress. He said sure, probably wondering how I would accomplish that. Well, in the international language of women, I pointed to my ring and said, “Oggi,” which means “today” in Italian. Of course, she understood. And I discovered the way to get a free plate of appetizers: She brought us over a plate of bread, prosciutto, and cheese. Maybe we should try that more often…
—Wanda Gonzalez
Ease Into It
Yes, it’s possible to have too much of a good thing, especially your first time out. Don’t get carried away with your enthusiasm for showing your partner all of the great stuff you can do on a camping trip. Start slow, start small, and gradually make your camping trips more challenging as your partner gets more comfortable. My friend Maria is a beginner camper, but she is willing to try new things because she trusts her boyfriend to understand where her comfort level is. “I feel I can trust him 100 percent with the plans and details of the trip that I may be more unsure of,” she says. “I can trust his judgment, trust his sense of what is a challenge versus what is dangerous, and I can trust that he takes my abilities into account.”
Let’s look at some ways to make those first few trips easier for someone who’s still not too sure about all of this outdoorsy stuff, and build their trust to the point where they’re willing to try more challenging outings.
Start at Home
If you’ve got a partner who is terrified of camping, try “practicing” at home first. If you have a yard, set up your tent there and spend a night in it together. Your partner will get a chance to see how warm and comfortable it can be, without ever being too far from a real bed. It will also give you a heads up on any extra comforts that your partner might need on a trip, like a travel pillow or a set of earplugs. Do it right by wearing the clothes you would bring with you on a camping trip.
You can also try out some of your camping meals at home before you go. If your secret recipe for tuna pasta supreme makes your partner gag, it’s better to find out before it’s the only thing you’ve got.
The More the Merrier
“ My husband kept saying he wanted me to come mountain biking with him, because it would be so much fun if we could do it together. So finally I said OK, I’d give it a try. But then as soon as we were on the trail, he just took off and left me (literally, might I add) in his dust. I wasn’t really sure where the trail went, or if it branched off anywhere.
By the time I caught up with him, he had been waiting for 15 minutes, and he was ready to take off as soon as he saw I was OK. So I didn’t rest at all, and this pretty much kept happening all day. As soon as I caught up, he’d take off again. At the end of the day I said, ”If that’s your idea of spending the day together, you might as well go by yourself.“
We eventually found a compromise. We go biking with a group so he can take off with the fast people, and I can follow along with the slower ones and not be left alone. ”
–HU
And be sure to try out some of the sexy suggestions in Chapter 5—you may find your partner is converted into an enthusiastic camper on the spot!
Bring the Car
Car camping can be an excellent way to introduce someone to the outdoors and get a new camper comfortable before trying to go into a park interior. Even if you are an experienced backcountry camper, take your partner on a car-camping trip the first couple of times. Having a vehicle nearby makes people feel safe, since you can always make a quick escape back to civilization. Car camping also gives you the option of bringing along more comforts of home since you don’t have as many limits on size and weight. And if things get really bad weather-wise, you can always hide in the car and turn the heat on—or even retreat to the nearest motel.
Sexy Tent
Games for a Rainy Day
If the weather’s bad, there’s no need to pack up your trip. Take the opportunity to hole up in your tent for a little romance. If you need help getting started, try one of my favorite games.
STRIP POKER:
Try the classic version or substitute your favorite card game. If you don’t have cards, try Strip 20 Questions. Pick a famous person to be (maybe someone naughty like Madonna or the Marquis de Sade), and let your partner guess who you are by asking questions with yes or no answers. For every question they need to ask, your partner loses an article of clothing. Chances are, you’ll never get to 20!
TEQUILA PIGS:
These little plastic piggies were designed as a drinking game, but you can bring along your own rules. When you throw the pig down, how it lands determines what you have to do. Snout down, remove a piece of clothing. Bum down, remove a piece of your partner’s clothing. Lying on one side, kiss an exposed part of your partner. Standing up, your partner has to perform the sexual act of your choice (time limits may apply). It’s even more fun than tequila, and you won’t get a hangover!
STORY TIME:
Take turns telling a sexy tale, with each person adding the next sentence. You can set the scene by making your story take place on a camping trip. Start of with something like: “Once upon a time, a handsome, young man (or beautiful, young woman) was walking through the woods.” Then the next person continues: “Suddenly, he saw something in the river ahead of him—someone bathing naked.” Well, you can see where this is going, but let your imaginations run free.
STRIP BATTLESHIP:
You’ll need