I-SOVIET MUTANTS. Amaphupho amnandi. СтаВл Зосимов Премудрословски
wommelwane waphazamisa okanye wabuza ngokuhlebeza. Ufike okokuqala kwibhunga.
– Luxolo. Baza kuthi baya kudanisa – siya kudanisa. -Iqhwatyelwe izandla kummelwane omncinci, emi ngasekunene. -Ke ke yiba nomonde kwaye ungahlukani nokumamela ibali likaGalupiya.
– Apha, okokugqibela.. – wongeze omnye ummelwane ukusuka ekhohlo. -atsiba liphezulu kunokuba liphantse usuku.
– Kutheni? -ambuza omncinci.
– Akukho kwanto ithethwayo, ke babecinga ukuba intlanganiso akufuneki ibe lilize…
– Kwaye ukuze ucinge ngcono, iNtloko iyalele ukubaatsiba…
– Kwaye ndiyathanda ukulala kwaye andikhathali nokuba kunjani.. – yatsho eyesithathu ukusuka kwesobunxele yalala.
– Ulala? Ke awuva nto? -ambuza omncinci.
– Akunjalo kwaphela, Cherevich omncinci, xa ulele ngcono uyaqonda ukuba uthini. Ikhefu kancinci…
– Uxolo kuwe!! Ubhinqe enye yeCherevichs ezindala.
– … Kwaye abantwana bethu abakwishumi elivisayo bangena kumlo olinganayo kunye nesidalwa esingaziwayo, esingaziwayo, esingathi, saqhekeza uphahla, sasivulela ilizwe elitsha. Ke kukho izinto ezifanayo ezihamba kuthi ukuze, ukuze sishukume, sondle kwinto enye nathi…
– Okanye, Nkosi, ngaba kukuhlaselwa oku? -uphazamisekile umntu.
– Musa ukuphazamisa,.. Yintoni ebendifuna ukuyithetha? -Semisrak uyathandabuza.
– … ziyafana njengoko thina … -alungiswa uCasulia Zack.
– Ewe… kunjalo… ziyafana nathi… Oko sihamba ngenxa yokutya. I—Vootoot.. Kwaye ndifuna ukubonelela, zintle zam, ukuba ndikhethe kwaye ndidibanise iqela okanye iqela labahlaseli kwaye nibathumele apho babevela khona, oko kukuthi, ngaphakathi kweGalupia yethu. Ngaba ndiyazicacisa?
– Ewe!! -uphendule wonke umntu.
– … Kwaye thumela elukhanyiseni ngokukhangela koMhlaba oMtsha. -uqhubeke uSemisrak. -Akukho nto ekunciphiseni ixesha kum.Galupia sele inciphile amaxesha amaninzi. I Shards ziyafa kwaye ngakumbi ebutsheni bazo. Kwaye ngokuthumela iqela, iqela okanye iqela, kuya kubakho ithemba elincinci. -u-Semisrak ukhonkothwe…
Ukuthula kuye kwaphulwa sisikhalo selungu lebhunga.
– O, Lord Generalisyphilis. Abenzanga nto, kodwa benze intetho. -aphazamisa uCherevich Chmoriko, omnye wabacebisi abasondeleyo kwiNkosi.
– Shut up, schmuck, andigqibile ukuthetha kwam!!! -UVladyka wayenomsindo kwaye wanyusa amathambo akhe esiya kuChmoriko. – Ke… Uh… Ke, ayenzi ngqondo ukutsala. Kodwa ukuthumela iqela, kuya kubakho uhlobo okungenani lwethemba elincinci… M-ewe.. Sele ndibonile oku kunikezelwa kwenye indawo?! -Uzihlole macala onke, watshintsha ubuso, wema ezimpondweni, wagxuma, wema emlenzeni wakhe, wakhaba, intloko yakhe wakhwaza. – Zaek, yintoni le ihagu eza nayo le ntetho entlokweni yam ngezivakalisi eziphindaphindiweyo
– III. – wothuka uZack.
– Ngaba ndingumntu ophindaphinda into enye? Chitha amandla akho kuphindaphinda. Awuyazi ukuba uLwimi luthatha amandla angaphezu kwa… ucinga?!
– Uphi?
– EKaraganda!! Uza kuya kolu hlazo lwam, mna Generalisiphilis uqobo, iNkosi yeGalupia yonke, Ingqondo yokulwa kobuzwilakhe kwelaseGalupi. Wow Uya kuba livolontiya lokuqala ukukhangela iqela. Kwaye uya kuba ligorha lokuqala kwimbali ye-shobla yethu okanye iqela okanye ikoloni.
– Yhe Lord yiba nenceba!! Ahahaaa!!! -khathaza uZack- andifuni ukuba ligorha. Ah!!
– Kwaye inqaku!!! (inkunzi) -uye uNkosi enkosi. «Unantoni, Mfundisi Chmor Iko?.. Nawe, Zeka, lungisa.»
– Enkosi, Owu Nkosi, bendifuna ukubuza, Ngubani omnye oza kuhamba ngaphandle kwam? -Cherevich Chmor Iko ubuzile.
– Wena!
– Me?
– Ewe, ewe, uya kuba sentlokweni yohambo. Ufuna ukuba liqhawe laseGalupia, njengam? -ubuze uSemisrak Chmor Iko. Oko kuya kutyhila yonke into ngelishwa ukuba kunjalo.
– Me? Andikakulungeli Andi… kwaye yintoni «uhambo lweshishini»?
– Uhambo ngeshishini liqela, kwaye iqela luluhambo. Ngokubanzi, uCasulia Zack uya kuchaza, uyazi, oku kubuchule bakhe. -Vladyka wanyuka emlenzeni-amathambo okanye ebantwini abaqhelekileyo – mosl.
– Andilungile. Vumela omnye umntu – uthuli luphume eCherevich.
– Akukho uthuli kwaye akukho mntu, njengoCasulia. Lityala lam. Ummelwane wahlebeza wahleka kancinci.
– Ndathi, yiya, ke uhambe, yiyo loo nto. -USemisraq wanyusa ithambo lakhe lomlenze lasekunene waza wagoba ikhakhayi lakhe phakathi kweempondo zexhama. -Ikhalthi ithe, i-shard yenziwe kwaye yeyokugqibela. Andidingi ukuqengqa uboya bekotoni. Linda! Thatha uCherevich Chmor Iko noKazuliya Zeku, kwaye uye kwindawo yokuhlaselwa. -Eli, iimbaleki zibaleke zaya kubamba uZeku noChmor Iko.
– Kuphela kufuneka uqaphele ukutsala kwimikhaba. Ngaba sele ingamagorha?! Yiya kwindawo yohlaselo. Kwaye konke okunye, ndibopha umhlangano, ngaphandle kwe-bazaar. Kwaye ndiyakuxolela ngokundimema ngokubanzi kwi-shards yeefonti ezintathu, isikhumba sikaZasratovich.
– Sele ndilapha, uBongameli baKho … – emva koko kwavela ukakayi enamathambo amathathu emilenze egobile kwaye enendawo etyhobozekileyo ecaleni kwayo.
Kudala kudala kukho ukudibana kwi-Great Hole (ngoku: Galupii) kwaye okwethutyana umthetho wathatyathwa nguCherevich Chmor Iko, owayeyintshatsheli eselula ephumeleleyo. Kodwa ukutshitshiswa nguGeneral Zasratich kumlo ongalinganiyo kwabamba itrone kaBothava Cherevich kwaye kubuyiswe ubukhosi, bebeka uVladyka ofanelekileyo. Emfazweni, waphulukana namandla okusebenza kwithambo lesine, sele wabethile inxenye yengca. Ukhubeka nje kwaye waphula inxenye yakhe. Kodwa ngenxa yoku woyika ngakumbi kwaye wayesatya, ngakumbi uSemisrak, kutheni embizele kuye. Kodwa abo balwayo bamnqula.
– Ohhh, wenze kakuhle, Zasratich!!! Ndiyabulela kwaye ndidumisa isantya sokulwa kunye nokunyaniseka kwezoluleko. Ke: thabatha abanye abalishumi bokulwa nawe, okona kubi kwaye ukhokele uhambo lweshishini.
– Kodwa uthini uCherevich Chmoriko? Ngaba wambeka njengentloko?
– Ahhh.. kum.... UVladyka uyathandabuza. -And ke andikunyulanga okwangoku.. Kwaye ke, awuyincinci, kuya kufuneka uthathe isigqibo sokuba ngubani oza kukhokela uhambo lweshishini… Hmmm… Ngaphezu koko, uya kuba ulapho wedwa, ngaphandle kwam kunye neGalupia. Ngaba uyafuna ukuthatha indawo yakhe kwaye ube ngumlinganiswa ophambili?
– Ewe, Nkosi yam!!
– Manje ke, qhubeka, kwaye ukuba akubafumani abalishumi abazinikelayo, ndiza kukuyalela ezinye ioyile zakho ukuba zibethe entlokweni yakho kwaye zikhuphe ibhola kuyo. Kwaye amaxesha amahlanu kamva, ukuba andikuboni, umoya wakho ngengabikho. Ixesha elidlulileyo: enye, enye, enye, enye, enye … – kwaye i-flinched ngokubanzi kwaye ngoko nangoko babaleka baya emsebenzini, kwaye emva kwakhe abalishumi bakhe basinda kwi-coup.
UVladyka wambukela ehamba.
– Mdaaaa, ude ukhale, abayi kuyenza… Abakholelwa ngokupheleleyo. -Uye wehla eholweni wakhwaza.
– Zisa u-Kazulia Vasya kum, uVladyka ufuna ukutya!!!
Kumhla wokuqala kwe-Generalisyphilis, abantu baphosa nje amavolontiya phakathi: iishawundi ezilishumi-ookopolotyeni abakhokelwa nguGeneral Zasrat Zasratich, uCherevich Chmor Iko Juu Wow noKazuliya Zeka Lee. Ukumbona ehamba kunye nekwayara yesimbo somculo, esifana «nokuvalelisana kweSlav».
Nabani na ochaza le ngoma: I-Galups okanye i-Slavs, ayaziwa, kuphela bayibiza «njengeKazuli» kwaye baxelisa iinxalenye zezixhobo ze-orchestra yi-Galupsky eyaziwayo, kunye ne-capell, umdaniso we-Local State Tap umdaniso kunye nomculo wokudanisa ikopi, phantsi kwesikhokelo seSemisrak efanayo, Obetha i-mezzo-soprano kunye ne-bass ephindwe kabini ngexesha elifanayo. Ngokubanzi, abanye babecula, xa bethetha, lo gama abanye bevalela umngxuma. Kwaye abahambi beshishini bazamile ukukhwela ukubuyela umva, aba bangamatsha-ntliziyo, kodwa bakhutshelwa ngaphandle kwaye xa umsantsa wokugqibela wawatywinwa, onke amalungu ohambo lweshishini ngokukhawuleza ayilibale indawo