SOVIET MASINTHIDWE. Zosangalatsa. СтаВл Зосимов Премудрословски
ndipo chimatulutsa mchira wake, ndipo Mfalansa ndi kumwetulira kwa China. Ndipo nenani: «Mtsikana wopusa», ndikuluma mano, galu amayamba kulira, ndipo Mfalansa ndi Wachichaina ayang’anani wina ndi mnzake chifukwa chotsatira tanthauzo la mawuwo, aliyense adzayankha m’chinenedwe chake chonyansa.
Ndipo mawonekedwe a nkhope alibe chochita nazo. Splash mphamvu.
Koma ine, wowerenga wanga wozunzidwa kwambiri, wotanganidwa ndi zinyalala zowona izi, zomwe sizinalembedwe ndi china chilichonse, koma monga chidziwitso chodziwikiratu, kuti mu nthawi yathu simungapeze ndipo izi sizabwino. Kunena zowona, nkhani yanga ndi chilengedwe chilengedwe chotchedwa «Toothy Frog Belching». Ndikudzipereka kuti ndikwaniritse ndikutanthauzira ndekha kuchokera ku Galupsky kupita ku Sparrow ndi kubwerera, kumene, kudzera mu chilankhulo cha anthu. Ndipo omwe adatsata m’mawu abodza awa, omwe, adalembedwanso mozama, azilankhulanso mwachangu, popeza inu ndi ine, mtumiki wanu wonyozeka, sitilankhula chilankhulo china. Inde, ndipo nthawi yocheperako imagwiritsidwa ntchito pakuwerenga. Tsopano tisiyanitsa kutsatsa kwachisanu ndi chiwiri ndikuwona momwe ndimeyi ikathera m’nkhaniyi.
Oo.... Koma iwo, amuna amalonda ndi mpheta, palibe malo ano omwe ndidasokonekera ndikufotokozera za zilankhulo?! Ali kuti? Ndipo apa, osati pamenepo. Ndikulembera iwe, adasowa. Ahh! Ndi awo, glitches anga, atakhala ndikuyankhula. Pepani, Pepani, ndayiwala kuti Dziko lapansi limazungulira mozungulira osati pansi pa mapazi athu, komanso pansi pa mapazi awo. Ndipo ali nalo mwachangu, kotero kuti adangoyang’ana zokongola, ndikuyimirira pakapena ndi kuwongera khosi langa, nthawi yomweyo ndidawapeza…
– Apa, Stasyan, zonse, ndizo zonse … – ali ndi chisoni m’maso mwake Zeka adamaliza nkhani yokhudza vuto la Galupiya ndi cholinga chaulendo wawo wabizinesi. -Tikufunika tipeze china chomwe chatenga m’malo mwa chakudya, monga momwe ma radiation yanu imakhala yama radio.
– Hmm. – Stasyan adasenda mutu wake wadazi ndi mapiko a dazi.
– Koma ngati mumayamwa ma radiation onse kuchokera kwa inu, ndiye kuti tingapeze kuti chakudya panjira?! Sitikufika pachikonzero ndipo sitipulumutsa Galupia. Ndipo anthu athu adzafa imfa yankhanza. – adapitilira General Zasratich.
– Inde, tidzigoneke tokha ndi njala. – adaonjezera Cherevich Chmor Iko.
– Khungu. chigaza chija chidagubuduzika ndikujambula chozungulira pamchenga ndi fupa. – mumaganizira za mimba yanu. – Sindinakonde lalikulu, ndipo adajambula bwalo pakati. – cholengedwa cha nduna.
Cherevich sakanatha kupirira ndipo adathamangira kwa wamkulu. Adayimilira ndikumukankha mwamphamvu. Wowombera anachokapo. Chmore Iko adadya moyo wake wonse ndipo m’modziyo anali ndi mphamvu kuposa wamatsenga aliyense. Adakhala pansi m’malo mwa Zasratich ndipo adakoka phale lachitatu, lodziwikiratu ndi kwa mwana wake wamkazi pakati pa bwalo. Cherepuk adayambanso chikumbumtima, adayimirira ndipo adangofuna kuukira Cherevich, pomwe Kazulia adalowererapo.
– Mwachete, chete… Limbani! -ndiye adabwerako ndikuzimitsa zojambula zake mwa kufinya.
– ndikudziwa choti ndichite. -Stasyan adati mopusa.
– Chiyani? – onse adafunsidwa mu nyimbo.
– Ndipo zakuti aliyense ayenera kugwirizanitsa ndikumvetsetsa kuti tonsefe tidzafa padziko lapansi chimodzimodzi. Kuwononga wina ndi mnzake, timalepheretsa chitukuko, ndipo tikachulukitsa, timachipongwe. Ndipo anthu okhawo sangamvetsetse kuti amvere ndani komanso kuti amve ndani. Koma sizingakhale zophweka kukhala palimodzi ndikuganiza pa chilichonse, ndikupanga dziko lapansi m’modzi.
Zowonadi, kwenikweni, iwo ndi omwe ali onse owona mtima ndi akuba. Funso nambala ya awa kapena ija?! Pano mukunena zoona a Galups, mukupha akuba, ndipo mukuba, ndipo iye amene adapanga zonse sangamvetse kuti awononge ndani ndikusiya ndani. Kupatula apo, kuchokera kumanzere chinthu chomwecho chidzachitika. Phwanyani gululi, khululukanani komanso mugwirizane. Khalani mpainiya osachita nsanje, koma kuthandizana. Popeza anali atatopa ndikudikirira kuti aonekere kwa inu…
– Ndiye ndichani? – atapuma pang’ono, khumi adafunsanso ndipo sanamvere.
– Mukufunika kuthamanga!! Pitilizani mtsogolo mokha ndipo musabwerere, osabwereza zolakwa za makolo anu!!
– China chake chomwe sindimakumvetsetsa, tidatipatsa zinthu zopanda nzeru kwa ife.. – Zasratich adafotokoza. – Fotokozerani mwachindunji choti achite?
– Thawani!! – Mpheta adalumphira m’manja mwake. – Thamanga ndipo ungothamanga osabwereranso.
– Mosatekeseka?! – Adasangalatsa Casulia Zacka.
– Eya, ulemerero kwa Ambuye, okonzedwa! – anasangalala Cherevich Chmor Iko ndikutembenukira kwa ambiri. – ndipo ena sanadandaule kupepesa.
– Yembekezani Shish.. – Zasratich adabowola.
– Hooray!! Pali dzenje!! – adayimba mokuwa ndikuimba nyimbo yawo: «Ah, hi hylaek, bir julomas birlaek». Tsoka ilo, izi sizimasulira m’mawu a anthu, koma mwakuthupi zili ngati… Uh … «idadya lalanje», amenewo ndi mawu a nyimboyo.
– Dikirani!!! Dikirani!! – Adafuula mosamala Casulia Zeka. Aliyense amatsika: ndani padziko lapansi, ndi amene mlengalenga podumpha. Amangotsutsana ndi mphamvu yokoka ndipo mphamvu yokoka sinawasamale, ngati ma SMScams kapena mapaketi a digito akuwuluka padziko lonse lapansi. Cherevich amalowa panyanga, ndipo chigaza, kudumpha kuchokera kumiyendo imodzi kupita kunzake, chozizira: mafupa awiri mmwamba, ndi awiri ena atatsamira pansi. Ma shoti atatu atapachikika mlengalenga: woyamba mu somersault; Chachisanu ndi chiwiri ndi cha mapasa, ndipo chakhumi chidapotoza miyendo yake kukhala chingwe.
– Zachitika, Zeka? – adafunsa Cherevich.
– Ndipo kothawira kuti? Njira yanji? – Zeka adaseka diso.
Aliyense anayang’anani wina ndi maso awo kukhazikika pa mpheta. Amamva kufunsidwa kosawoneka bwino kwa ena.
– Huh? 1 Chifukwa chiyani mukundiyang’ana choncho? Titha kuthamangira komwe: kumanja, kumanzere, kumbuyo, kutsogolo, kumtunda, pansi… Osachepera, komabe tibwerere kuno.
– Chifukwa? – adafunsa aliyense mokweza.
– Dziko lapansi chifukwa ndi lozungulira. – adayankha mpheta ndipo adazunzikanso. – Ndidawuluka, molingana ndi lingaliro, apa.. Ndidawuluka. Kodi mukumva Ndidawuluka, koma sindinapite kapena kuthamanga … – Stasyan adadzuka ndikusesa chingwe chake. – mchira, kodi ukukula?
– Bwerani, osadandaula. – Anakanda chigaza ndipo anayamba kuchita ndewu. Omenyera nkhondo adamtsata. Stasyan wabwerera.
– Ayi, ayi, muli bwanji?! Ndinakumbukira. Mpira wowunikira, Dzuwa, udagudubuzika kumeneko … – ndipo unaloza chakum’mawa. – ndipo ndinawulukira kumamphukira ake.. Chifukwa chake, tifunika kuthamangira kumbuyo, komwe kubisala dzuwa, kumbuyo kwa kamvula.
– Kwambiri.
– Eya. Wolemba wanzeru kwambiri. -Stasyan adatulutsa mapiko ake pamwambamwamba ngati ndakatulo. – Voot …, Uh… Mwachidule, kumbuyo. Komwe inali kubisala – ndinawuluka, koma tsopano ndikufunika kuthamangira, komwe imakwera.
– Ndipo pali chiyani? – Casulia adafunsa.
– Ku Chelyabinsk, kapena makamaka Mtambo Tech. Ndipo panali kamodzi kuphulika komanso ma radio radio okoma kwambiri kotero kuti zonse zimangowala. Ndipo padakali zinyalala za wailesi padziko lonse lapansi. Pali zabwino zamibadwo yamuyaya. – Ndipo Stasyan adapinda msana wake, ndikuwonetsera pachifuwa chake ndi gudumu.
– Chabwino, kotero iwo adathamanga kuti timangomamatira ngati zipatso pamtengo mbiya? – adalumpha Casulia.
– Omenyera, zomanga!! – idalamula chigaza ndipo chonsecho chidagwa. – Begoooo, kumbuyo kwa mpheta, kuguba!!!
Ndipo onse anangoyenda mosiyana, akumasiya fumbi la dziko. Ndipo dzuwa linawalira pamwamba pamitu yawo. Anathamanga mwachangu kwambiri kotero kuti usiku sunalinso ndi nthawi yoti ubwere. Ndipo Dzuwa limayamba kuyamba kugwera ndipo chilichonse chinali mwachangu komanso mwachangu. Ndipo kuthamanga kwa othamanga kunakwera kwambiri kotero kuti ananyamuka kale kukakumana nawo dzuwa litalowa ndikupita kum’mawa. Ndipo usana unasinthidwa ndi usiku, ndipo