Montegue Blister’s Strange Games: and other odd things to do with your time. Alan Down
now has to unknot the rest of the players in the quickest time possible.
Collapsing Bridges is tremendous fun—as long as you don’t have back problems or a phobia of being trapped under heavy weights.
For two evenly sized players; one makes the ‘bridge’ by kneeling on the floor and then placing their hands on the ground, leaving adequate space for the second player to crawl beneath their stomach. This second player crawls through a maximum of three times and the player being the bridge has to decide on one of those times to collapse (much of the excitement of the game is not knowing when this will happen). This they do by letting their weight take over and flopping onto the player crawling beneath them. The aim of the crawler is to get free in the quickest time possible. The bridge player cannot use arms and legs to keep the other trapped, but must use purely their weight.
Bucking Bronco has been played by every child at one time or another but few carry on playing to adulthood—which is a shame because it improves and gets much funnier as you get older. For two players, one plays the Bronco by kneeling on the floor and supporting their upper body with their arms. The rider now sits on them, not in the centre of the back but nearer the bottom, takes their feet off the floor and holds onto the collar of the Bronco with one hand only. It is now the Bronco’s role to dislodge the rider in the quickest time using sudden movements, spins and turns, but keeping knees and hands on the floor at all times.
Banana Racing
Banana Racing is simplicity itself and great to play on a polished floor.
Slide one foot as far forward as you are able, as if slipping on a discarded banana skin. Then drag the trailing foot back up to meet the first. Both of your feet must remain touching the ground at all times. Once you have mastered the required feet movements, you need to practise increasing the speed—obviously the faster the better. And remember, if you are playing this outside the official shoes of the Banana Racer are not training shoes or sneakers but a pair of leather-soled brogues.
To play real banana racing you will need…bananas. Eat the insides then use strong rubber bands to attach the skins, slippy-side exposed, to the base of your shoes. Competitors now race to complete a course in the quickest time whilst avoiding falling. Possibly the only game around in which you can boost your potassium levels and risk a serious hamstring injury all at the same time.
Blood Potato
Combine Blindman’s Buff with Murder in the Dark and you get not ‘Buff Blindman in the Dark’, but Blood Potato—a superb indoor game. This is rarely seen played at parties, but it is reasonably common at drama schools (presumably it is popular with all the budding Bela Lugosis).
All players are blindfolded and one of them is given the role of murderer (without anyone else knowing who that person is). Players then start to move around the room. If two meet they must say the word ‘potato’ to each other; however, if the murderer meets someone, instead of saying ‘potato’ he must say the word ‘blood’, upon which they must scream dramatically, die, and remove themselves from the game by standing at the edge of the room. The game continues, with the body count increasing and fear levels rising until no ‘potatoes’ are left.
The game is improved immeasurably if eliminated players encourage and shout warnings and directions to the remaining players.
Living Room Challenges
Often the best indoor games are those that require little or no equipment except your own body and a wish to test it to its limits.
Furthest Coin is a fun game for players of similar height. The object of the game is to place a coin on the floor as far away from your feet as possible and then pick it up again.
However, you cannot move your feet from their starting position, and, to reach as far as possible, you can support your body only with your non-coin-holding hand. Once the coin has been placed, the players must now return to a standing position in a similar one-armed fashion. To complete the game, all players now have to recover their coins using the same method. The winner is the player who manages to place, and successfully retrieve, a coin the furthest distance from their feet.
Another great indoor game for players of similar height is Furthest From the Wall. Taking turns, each player must stand some distance from a wall and then lean forward towards it and support themselves (to avoid crashing head first into the wall) with ONE arm only. Their feet must remain together and in a fixed position. To complete their turn they must get back to the upright position by pushing hard off the wall, again using one hand only. No step-backs are allowed and the feet must remain in a fixed position throughout.
Players continue to take turns, each time trying to get further back from the wall. The one who successfully completes the manoeuvre with his feet the biggest distance away is the winner.
Drawing Room Baseball
An extremely silly indoor game, but immense fun nonetheless, Drawing Room Baseball brings the great American sport into the living room and provides hours of endless amusement and broken ornaments.
This game is best played with small teams of three or four players (but it does depend on how big your house is). Simply re-arrange some room furnishings (cushions, chairs, etc.) to provide the bases, then replace the baseball bat with a kitchen spatula (either wood or metal) and instead of a baseball use a Ping-Pong ball. This gives the pitcher the opportunity to wind up their throwing arm and pitch the ball as hard as they want without fear of injury. Any damage to the room is not from bat and ball action, but rather the dashes to reach bases and the scrambles for the ball of the fielding team.
Bucket Ball
Bucket Ball has a similar feel to Hanetball (see page 180), in the sense that the player actually stands within the goal but it is much weirder, more fun and…uses buckets.
For two competing players, at the start of the game each player stands facing the other, a few yards apart. Both have placed their feet into plastic buckets, one on each foot. If children are playing a standard bucket is usually perfect; for adult players you may need to search a garden centre for larger specimens.
Players hold in their hands an equal number of small balls. The aim of the game is to throw as many balls as possible into either of your opponents’ buckets, whilst avoiding getting too many in your own. Players are allowed to move about, so the game soon develops into tense stand-offs, daring bucket-footed attacks, and desperately clumsy leg movements to avoid incoming balls landing in one of your own buckets. Any player falling over loses, and once all the balls have been thrown the bucket-balls should be added up to determine the winner.
Elbow Racing
Unless you have access to knee and elbow protectors, the old Inuit game of Elbow Racing (Ikusimmiaq) is probably best played inside on a thick carpet.
To play, simply crouch down on your knees, place both elbows on the floor and both hands over your ears. Now, maintaining this position—race. You can not remove your hands from your ears and you must propel yourself forwards using only your knees and elbows.
The fastest person over the course, or, more usually, the person who can stop laughing the longest, wins.
Faceball
Every so often the human brain surpasses itself with its ingenuity and invents a game so sublime that Olympic status can surely only be months away. Faceball is one such game.
Created by the staff at Flickr.com, the game of Faceball is like a stationary version of dodgeball, but much more fun.
For two players; each sits on an office chair ten feet from the other. Players then take it in turns to throw